avoiding sexism drama and gossip

Nurses Men

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I'm hoping I'm wrong and being paranoid but I want to make sure I avoid as many problems as I can as a new nurse. I graduated in 2013 with my BSN in nursing and worked at a inner city hospital for two years as a PCA and when I graduated college I was promoted to an RN on the same unit.......bad idea... Apparently some of the staff did not see me as a RN but still as a PCA and it caused many problems eventually causing me to leave my job as a RN there after 7 months. I just now found another job at a nursing home after being unemployed for 5 months looking for RN jobs. As a new male RN I want to make sure I avoid sexism gossip and drama as much as possible in order to be successful and take good care of my patients. Does anyone have any experience or advice regarding this?

Specializes in Peds, Med-Surg, Disaster Nsg, Parish Nsg.

Moved to Men in Nursing forum for more response.

Remember that the people with which you work are your coworkers-not your friends.

That doesn't mean that you should not be friendly but keep your personal life at home and stay out of other peoples as best you can. The same people who want to gossip to you about someone else are the people who will gossip about you as soon as you aren't around.

Other than that bust you behind, always learn and always help. Earn their respect by being a professional.

Here is my advice. Become skilled at active listening. Do not volunteer information that can be used against you, but do not completely shut down conversation that you find questionable. Often times, when people recognize resistance to involve yourself in face time, you run the risk of being the target. Trust your instincts, and learn the players in the game. I have a personal experience for you. I am a male. I had a female supervisor, my immediate supervisor, come on to me at a Christmas party. I denied her advance, this ultimately turned into career suicide for me at work. She rallied her peers against me, all of a sudden I became known as insubordinate at work, lacking professionalism, etc. Needless to say, line staff at institutions like jails know the path of least resistance in dealing with superiors is the way to go. So, I walked around with the scarlet letter around my chest for over five years. All the while top county officials asking me if I was a glutten for punishment? The point to this is sometimes things cannot be avoided, and trouble will find you. Just keep moving on, and try to stay out of the garbage as much as YOU can.

Specializes in burn ICU, SICU, ER, Trauma Rapid Response.

Wow! You left a paying hospital RN job for 5 months of unemployment then a job at a LTC? I think YOU might be oversensitive. I can understand looking for another job due to the unit culture, but to leave for employment? Wow.

Specializes in ER, ICU.
Wow! You left a paying hospital RN job for 5 months of unemployment then a job at a LTC? I think YOU might be oversensitive. I can understand looking for another job due to the unit culture, but to leave for employment? Wow.

Yeah maybe, but you don't know what happened or what was going on.

Do home care. You're by yourself all day. You get to start work whenever you want. Only thing is it feels like you're always working. Least you won't have to deal with office politics. I can understand your attitude. I've left other jobs for far less. Don't listen to anyone trying to tell you to change your overall attitude. It's nonsense. What makes you a good nurse is rooted in how you are and your personal characteristics. How many in-services have you been to telling you how to walk into a patient's room and how to conduct yourself? That sort of thing should be common sense. I personally have never had much issues as far as office politics; I generally don't care what other people are saying about each other or about me. I set the initiative to be as helpful as possible regardless of how you feel about me. Being talked about does not affect my confidence; simple plan is to mind your own business - get in there and do what you have to do - get out.

Specializes in NICU, PICU, Transport, L&D, Hospice.

I have always employed a no gossip no drama expectation at work.

When I have been included in gossip fests I excuse myself the moment I realize what is happening, same with general drama.

If I am asked why I am exiting I am honest, I don't listen to gossip and don't speak gossip.

I don't make a big deal about it I just exclude myself, they may do what they want, say what they want (even about me) they just get to do it without my presence.

This attitude has never been a problem for me in the workplace.

I have never had a problem connecting on a positive level with my co-workers and enjoy excellent collaborative relationships.

Good luck.

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