Autistic, male, and wants to be a pediatric nurse

sleepwalker, MSN, NP · Oct 11, 2021

Take it one step at a time...just like you're already doing.

JP_403 · Oct 11, 2021

3 hours ago, sleepwalker said:

Take it one step at a time...just like you're already doing.

will do

FlameHeart, CNA · Oct 18, 2021

Hello. I can't tell you my real name, because I must keep the rules of this website. However I can tell you to call me FlameHeart.

I am a Man, 31 years old, Single, and Christian.

My mom suspected I may have Asperger's, a mild form of high-functioning Autism, but I have never been officially diagnosed with such a condition.

It is true I do not think like most people and I am happy about that. I grew up very sheltered spending most of my time in my room, alone, happy with my video games, internet, movies, tv, and books. Most of my few friends growing up were only at elementary school or college, I didn't have any friends in middle school, went into homeschooling half the time, and I was only in highschool for half a year before being homeschooled until I got my GED.

Hitting puberty and questioning reality after seeing The Martix was a big factor in changing the way I thought and being unable to connect with people my own age in the way that I thought made me not interested in them, occasionally the teachers were easier to talk to.

Please forgive me for not using proper grammer in my paragraph structures, I break up my collection of words more frequently in order to make them eaiser to read for most people, unlike me, do not like reading large collections of words even if they are properly constructed according to the rules of English. I myself dislike reading large collections of words without good structure.

Getting back to my background: it wasn't until I moved to Hawaii on my own at 25 years old as an independent adult Man permanently on his own away from parents that a series of events led to God revealing himself to me and confirming that he exists independently of anyone's beliefs but I got to know who he truly is only through The Holy Bible and Jesus The Christ. Since then my understanding of reality is defined by him and his book The Holy Bible.

I think because of my own unique way of thinking that changed over the years growing up, my rejection of how other people think, always seeking to prove everything not just accepting whatever I'm told by anyone, and my inexperience with socializing with people has led many people even to this day not understand me very well thinking I may be annoying or weird or even autistic or germaphobic.

But that doesn't upset me, because I know who and what I am and who God has made me into and is making me into being. I don't live to make everyone happy or pleased, only God. That being said I do care about people with an enormous amount of compassion and love and kindness and patience and anything else I need that I must ask for and must be refilled with every day by God or else I literally run out of.

I am very intelligent, I think far more than I speak even I though I speak more than most people, I notice details, I look at most things around me when I am not thinking too much in my own head, I have learned alot and remember alot and understand alot of things.

1 person thinks I should be a RN instead of a CNA, because the way that I am. I will be, but not yet. It will take me about 5 years to get my ADRN while getting my Musical Theatre Degree to as I will not give up a part of myself just to focus on Nursing.

I treat everything I do seriously, regardless of pay. I am honorable, loyal, honest, respectful, and I follow all laws and rules I know and understand and have agreed to follow. This includes being a born citizen of this country, a member of this state and county, a CNA, etc. because I am an honest person and I do what I know and understand to be right regardless of who is watching me. I wouldn't feel right about myself if I didn't.

I am the kind of person who will attempt to read all or most of everything I sign every time, unless it says "I have read ALL of this and I agree to it." then I HAVE TO read all of something before I sign it, otherwise I would be lying. I am the kind of person who will report myself if I know I did something is explicitly against the rules I agreed to follow.

What is right and what is wrong is clearly defined, known, and understood by our creator God, his book The Holy Bible, our country's government, our local government, the licenses we carry, and the places we work at. All in that specific order of ranking and importance. Morality does not change at the highest level of God and his book and it is not up to debate or interpretation. Many of our government laws are the same way except when they are changed due to legal process and must be interpreted and judged on a case by case basis according to a Judge in a court.

As individuals we have various feelings about many things, but our feelings do not change what is right or what is wrong. But there exceptions some laws make in regards to how they are followed based on the case by case situation.

People establish their own set of "rules" in addition to the above and often they vary based on the person. Every person is different with many factors that contribute to this such as their age and it can get easier to interact with them based on common factors across large groups such as their age, stage in life, level of maturity, their religion, their romantic life, etc.

I see people as a learning experience like taking a class in school. It's true math is much easier for me as it is simpler than learning about people and how to interact with them, but I still find people fascinating, some groups more so than others like children as I want to be Father one day and I just love children.

I say all of this because my background, the way my mind works, and I how I feel about certain things is all relevant to showing you I can relate to you and understand you better than some people can.

My advice is to treat each person as a learning experience like you are in a classroom. No 2 people are like, yes we can assume some things and treat them accordingly based off certain factors like their age or social group as a starting point, but as long as you adapt to each person as you learn about you will be most likely loved by them. This is because while we all have some things in common, we also are all different in many ways and we each want to be learned and known as the unique individuals that we are. When people take the time and consideration to do this and to treat us accordingly with respect to this these are the kinds of people that often become our friends.

JP_403 · Oct 20, 2021

On 10/18/2021 at 1:50 PM, FlameHeart said:

Hello. I can't tell you my real name, because I must keep the rules of this website. However I can tell you to call me FlameHeart.

I am a Man, 31 years old, Single, and Christian.

My mom suspected I may have Asperger's, a mild form of high-functioning Autism, but I have never been officially diagnosed with such a condition.

It is true I do not think like most people and I am happy about that. I grew up very sheltered spending most of my time in my room, alone, happy with my video games, internet, movies, tv, and books. Most of my few friends growing up were only at elementary school or college, I didn't have any friends in middle school, went into homeschooling half the time, and I was only in highschool for half a year before being homeschooled until I got my GED.

Hitting puberty and questioning reality after seeing The Martix was a big factor in changing the way I thought and being unable to connect with people my own age in the way that I thought made me not interested in them, occasionally the teachers were easier to talk to.

Please forgive me for not using proper grammer in my paragraph structures, I break up my collection of words more frequently in order to make them eaiser to read for most people, unlike me, do not like reading large collections of words even if they are properly constructed according to the rules of English. I myself dislike reading large collections of words without good structure.

Getting back to my background: it wasn't until I moved to Hawaii on my own at 25 years old as an independent adult Man permanently on his own away from parents that a series of events led to God revealing himself to me and confirming that he exists independently of anyone's beliefs but I got to know who he truly is only through The Holy Bible and Jesus The Christ. Since then my understanding of reality is defined by him and his book The Holy Bible.

I think because of my own unique way of thinking that changed over the years growing up, my rejection of how other people think, always seeking to prove everything not just accepting whatever I'm told by anyone, and my inexperience with socializing with people has led many people even to this day not understand me very well thinking I may be annoying or weird or even autistic or germaphobic.

But that doesn't upset me, because I know who and what I am and who God has made me into and is making me into being. I don't live to make everyone happy or pleased, only God. That being said I do care about people with an enormous amount of compassion and love and kindness and patience and anything else I need that I must ask for and must be refilled with every day by God or else I literally run out of.

I am very intelligent, I think far more than I speak even I though I speak more than most people, I notice details, I look at most things around me when I am not thinking too much in my own head, I have learned alot and remember alot and understand alot of things.

1 person thinks I should be a RN instead of a CNA, because the way that I am. I will be, but not yet. It will take me about 5 years to get my ADRN while getting my Musical Theatre Degree to as I will not give up a part of myself just to focus on Nursing.

I treat everything I do seriously, regardless of pay. I am honorable, loyal, honest, respectful, and I follow all laws and rules I know and understand and have agreed to follow. This includes being a born citizen of this country, a member of this state and county, a CNA, etc. because I am an honest person and I do what I know and understand to be right regardless of who is watching me. I wouldn't feel right about myself if I didn't.

I am the kind of person who will attempt to read all or most of everything I sign every time, unless it says "I have read ALL of this and I agree to it." then I HAVE TO read all of something before I sign it, otherwise I would be lying. I am the kind of person who will report myself if I know I did something is explicitly against the rules I agreed to follow.

What is right and what is wrong is clearly defined, known, and understood by our creator God, his book The Holy Bible, our country's government, our local government, the licenses we carry, and the places we work at. All in that specific order of ranking and importance. Morality does not change at the highest level of God and his book and it is not up to debate or interpretation. Many of our government laws are the same way except when they are changed due to legal process and must be interpreted and judged on a case by case basis according to a Judge in a court.

As individuals we have various feelings about many things, but our feelings do not change what is right or what is wrong. But there exceptions some laws make in regards to how they are followed based on the case by case situation.

People establish their own set of "rules" in addition to the above and often they vary based on the person. Every person is different with many factors that contribute to this such as their age and it can get easier to interact with them based on common factors across large groups such as their age, stage in life, level of maturity, their religion, their romantic life, etc.

I see people as a learning experience like taking a class in school. It's true math is much easier for me as it is simpler than learning about people and how to interact with them, but I still find people fascinating, some groups more so than others like children as I want to be Father one day and I just love children.

I say all of this because my background, the way my mind works, and I how I feel about certain things is all relevant to showing you I can relate to you and understand you better than some people can.

My advice is to treat each person as a learning experience like you are in a classroom. No 2 people are like, yes we can assume some things and treat them accordingly based off certain factors like their age or social group as a starting point, but as long as you adapt to each person as you learn about you will be most likely loved by them. This is because while we all have some things in common, we also are all different in many ways and we each want to be learned and known as the unique individuals that we are. When people take the time and consideration to do this and to treat us accordingly with respect to this these are the kinds of people that often become our friends.

that's alot to take in wow! Thanks for telling me a lot about yourself!

FlameHeart, CNA · Oct 22, 2021

On 10/19/2021 at 11:57 PM, JP_403 said:

that's alot to take in wow! Thanks for telling me a lot about yourself!

You are welcome.

I can say many things about myself because I do not have what other people think I should have as a barrier to this kind of behavior. I never learned to develop this barrier growing up as I never bothered to invest much time into socializing once I hit puberty. Analysis of this indicates that this is likely a learned psychological defense mechanism many people develop to protect themselves from other people using knowledge about themselves to hurt them. Trust takes time to build. Their lack of trust allows for their fear to motivate them to develop this kind of barrier most likely.

However, while it does take time for people to earn my trust as well and it does still hurt if they use the information about me to harm me I still refuse to be so afraid to of this that I would refuse to share any or most information about myself.

I have come to learn that all relationships involve the risk of pain and the greater the trust the greater the harm someone can do me however trust is built over time as they prove this is something they will NOT do.

So I put my own information out there about myself to people as I think they need to hear it in order to help them either online or in person and I make myself vulnerable and willing to get hurt, because sometimes it's important people know things about you so they can relate to you and feel like they're not alone in whatever trouble in life they are going through.

If you can learn this lesson and how to listen and treat people according the kind of individual that they are then this will help you alot in all your interactions with your fellow Humans especially teenagers in Pediatrics as many are struggling with discovering their own identities as well as the meaning of life and other deep philosophical questions.

JHURN · May 25, 2022

That’s awesome! Honestly I think you would be great at peds. I have worked with some awful peds nurses, and as long as you have compassion and kindness towards your patients you will be fine. Plus you will probably care for some autistic kiddos too and they will absolutely look up to you if you share your experience with them.