Asking for guidance/opinions just like everyone else.....

[BrandNewLisa]

Before I begin with my maxi-rant, I just want to first say thank you to all of the wonderful people that post here. I am a student who begins her core program in Spring 2012, as well as an information hog, so read several forums here daily. I am of the belief that if Google doesn't know it, than I don't need to know it, lol. However, as I embark on my new journey, I find myself scared and conflicted, and I am not quite sure what to do.

I began my academic career as an 18 year old National Merit Scholar in 1992, attending Pre-Med. With a full ride, my entire life was before me. Yeah, which means I blew it. I called myself taking a "break" sophomore year, to get my mind together before I permanently lost my scholarships. During my break I got a job, which I happened to be dam good at. Fast-forward 18ish years and I find myself making pretty good money, 50k plus incentives/bonuses as a recruiter/staffing manager. I like my job, and I am good at what I do, however it is not my passion, and I cannot see myself doing it until I retire. A few years ago, in a down economic market, I decided that it was time to pursue my passion. This quarter, I complete all of my gen. ed. requirements, leaving me nothing but my core course starting in Spring. I was completely excited and ready to start nursing school, until maybe the last week or so. To be blunt, I am absolutely petrified.

This could entirely be because of my tendency to over research things, but with what I am reading here, I almost am beginning to question whether the entire thing will be worth it in the end. Giving up life for school, graduating and not being able to find a job for a year, finally getting a position to only be petrified every single second of every single day that I will make a mistake that may not only cost me everything that I have sacrificed for, but may cost someone their life. So many new nurses here seem so unhappy, and often question their choice to go into the field. The medical field is my first and only love, and I want to jump in both feet first, but now I am completely questioning the wisdom at starting all over at 37 in a career that inspires so much fear and angst. Switching from the black and whiteness of the HR world to the 'critical thinking' model of nursing scares the crap out of me.

Thank you for allowing me to vent. I know that I am meant to be a nurse, and will be a fantastic one if given the chance. I am just curious as to what made YOU want to make the sacrifice? Being a bit older and so settled into another career path, can I be the successful patient advocate that I truly want to be? I work 8-5 Monday through Friday, paid overtime as needed. I run to the grocery on break if I need to, and run Target when I get the urge. Am I crazy to walk away from that comfort and flexibility for the career that I have been passionate about for 20 years? I know that none of you can answer that dilemma for me, but I think I just needed to exhale in front of those living the life day in and day out. As a child of the internet, I understand that more people are likely to go online to complain than they are to comment and post when they are happy. The occasional flashes of love, passion, and dedication to the craft I see here are what keep me inspired. Thank you so much for allowing me to decompress, it was much needed. And apologies for the lengthy rant!!!!!

[TopazLover, BSN, RN]

I wish every potential nurse thought things through.

I don't know if you can reconcile the problems in nursing to your dream of being a nurse. You have recognized some of the issues. You may want to think about the fact that you will be working odd shifts and as the bottom of the pole will be the one to whom unrealistic schedules are pushed, Forget about dropping by the local store for a quick break. Those mini vacations of 5-25 minutes will be great remembrances.

I gave up half my children's' early lives to follow my dream of becoming a nurse. Along the way I got divorced (not related to nursing, but I know many marriages that did not survive college). I have a good relationship with all my kids but know it would have been better if I had not been so attached to that nurse dream.

I did it when I was in my early 20s. I don't know if I would have given up a decent job for the pipe dream that the nurse job has become. What you read is reality. You don't read much of the good stuff that happens to a nurse. You get to read the vents. No one can make the decision for you but recognize your decision will affect and effect others even if you are not in a relationship and have no children. You have not spent 37 years living as a hermit.

I understand I have not calmed your fears. I also know that what you have written would scare me if I were considering nursing as a career. If you still want to be a nurse after writing as you have I think you must really want it badly.

Best wishes.

[sunbaby0811]

Sounds like you and I have an awful lot in common! As a mid-30s career changer myself, I don't have any advice from the other side of the fence yet, but one thing you wrote grabbed me:

"Am I crazy to walk away from that comfort and flexibility for the career that I have been passionate about for 20 years?"

My answer to you is NO. You are not crazy. I figure I have 20-30 years left to work and while I know that it's not all sunshine and lollipops when you do something you feel passionate about, it's got to be infinitely better than being miserable every day of your life. IMO, that's no way to live.

Good luck in your decision!

[Nicky30, BSN, RN]

I think you only ever regret that which you did not do. You appear to regret not taking the opportunity when you had it. Is it a risk taking the opportunity now?

Perhaps, but only the person who risks is free.

:redpinkhe

Nic.

[TheDreamJourney]

I am 23 and can relate to your post. I am also changing careers from psychology to nursing. It was not an easy decision and I am scared too. I read some of the posts on the forums and I think that maybe I am crazy for pursuing this. But if I don't become a nurse I will regret it and I can't live with regret. You only have one life to live, so live it to the fullest. If you feel that nursing is for you then go for it! :)

[AnonRNC]

"I know that I am meant to be a nurse, and will be a fantastic one if given the chance. I am just curious as to what made YOU want to make the sacrifice?"

Lisa, I think you should go to nursing school. You feel it in your bones and you have the maturity (you're 37 yrs old) to know yourself well. Sometimes life isn't about making the most money, but doing what you love and having what you need. Although I must say that I think nursing offers me excellent compensation for my level of education.

When I was 21, I was on the fast track at a benefits administrator (medical, dental, pension for union members). I was a pension benefits estimator and next in line to be an adjustor - the top of the non-management tier. I would have been a manager before I was 30.

But I didn't like it.

I left the office (and high heels and pantyhose) and wandered a bit. When I was 23, I became a CNA in a LTC. As a child I thought I wanted to be a nurse, but workingin LTC I decided I did not. Later I had the opportunity to move to a hospital setting and saw a different kind of nursing, the kind I wanted to do. So I went back to school.

I got my RN at 28. The first year was horrible; I thought I had made a huge mistake and wasn't meant to be a nurse. The next few years were better. I found that I had knowledge and could make a difference. At 34, I entered the NICU and found what my heart had been seeking. Seven years later, I L.O.V.E. what I do. No doubts.

Best wishes to you!

[onthemark]

AnonRNC, I love your story! You had a kernal of a dream, you followed it, and you eventually "found what your heart had been seeking"! Good for you!

[carolmaccas66, BSN, RN]

Sweetie, you remind me so much of a guy your age I used to work with.

He passed his 1st year of his RN BSN. Then in the 1st semester, 2nd year he failed by ONE POINT. He ranted & raved & begged the university to pass him, but no, they said he must re-sit his unit. He didn't want to, but he truly wanted to be a RN. He could not do any other units until he passed the one he'd failed. Well he kept making excuses as to why he couldn't do it; the uni should have passed him, he was too busy, his little daughter kept getting colds - anything under the sun to not actually enrol and do the RN course.

I said to him one day, if you don't bite the bullet and just DO the RN course, you will never know what it is like & realise ur dream. I don't know if he did finish it, but when I left that job, he was still ruminating & making excuses.

You will never ever know, until you actually do at least one year & do clinicals; even then, u won't know what it's like to actually be a RN, managing ur time & a patient load.

If ur this anxious just thinking about it, I would say do not do it.

Nobody has a crystal ball; but if u suffer this much anxiety now, I would say it will increase a thousandfold studying to become a RN.

Whatever you decide though, I wish you luck.

[Fannie'sMom, BSN, RN]

I am not 100% certain this will help, but if I may, I will briefly share my story, as it seems as if we were/are in similar shoes. I was 37, in a cush job making good $$$ with lots benefits. My plan was to retire at 42, leave all that behind (as I did not like my career) and enter a BSN program.

Then one fateful day the decision was taken away from me and my 15 year career was gone, along with the money and all the perks. After a year to get over the shock of it all, I pulled myself up off the ground and finished my AA and then transfered to a BSN program. I am 178 days away from graduation.

Looking back, I never would have left. Despite the fact that I hated the culture of my job, I never would have left the money of that job, to go into debt to go back to school, to work in a job I would work a 100 times harder at, for less pay. I was very pratical and would have put a secure financial future ahead of my dreams.

Thankfully fate stepped in and all of my security was ripped away from me and left me no other option but to fulfill my dreams, financial security be damned! I got a second chance at life and I wouldn't have it any other way.

All that being said, I think you have a greater passion for the profession than I did; at least that is the sense I get. So let me ask you a few questions (for you to answer only to yourself)? I'm sure you have life experience enough that you know a lot of what nursing is about, so can you do the job? Are you smart? Do you have common sense? Are you detail oriented? Do you have good communication skills and empathy? Are you compassionate? Can you focus and do well in school?

I pray frequently that I may never make a mistake that would take anyone's life, but I don't let that thought fill me with fear or doubt. I know I am going to be a very good nurse and I am going to do my absolute best to follow my education and training while being guided by my life experience. What do you think with regard to this (killing a patient)?

Last question. When you are about to leave this world and you are looking back over your life, how do you think you will feel if you don't do this?

I hope any/some/all of this helps...

Best to you :hug: !!!

[xtxrn, ASN, RN]

What would be worse? Finding out you don't like something and going back to something you know you were successful at, OR never giving it a try?