Hi all, I recently switched from acute care after 5 years to outpatient PACU. It's less stressful although I am nervous giving so many narcotics. It's a bit routine and I don't get to do IVs (only remove), draw blood, foleys, IV pumps, wounds, etc. I emailed my former manager about coming back per diem. So far I haven't heard back but I heard she's out on family leave. All the patients, nurses, and doctors I worked with complimented me on how I did my job, as did my boss, but my boss and close friends commented that the job seemed to stress me out too easily.
I never freaked out in front of patients, but sometimes in break room or nurse's station I would talk about being overwhelmed, wanting to cry, wanting to quit... I know, not professional. Maybe to do with bipolar disorder and anxiety. But it never affected my job performance, just my own mental health. For this reason I'm not sure if my boss will take me back and if I should apply per diem at another hospital (lots of hospitals hiring.) I still have bad dreams about my hospital days... last night about a time a patient needed a second IV for antibiotics because other IV used for bicarb drip. My floor was so understaffed, no one free to help. I tried to help but missed 3 times, pt's nurse couldn't do it and we had to pause the bicarb for 30 mins =( This was 4 years ago. Why does it still come into my mind?? Are these dreams and my coworkers' feedback a sign I shouldn't ever do acute care again? They all want me to come back. Does anyone think they personally aren't mentally fit for acute care? Not as in can't do the job, just that it affects you too negatively? Thanks
Specializes in Community Health, Med/Surg, ICU Stepdown.
8 hours ago, brandy1017 said:
I would advise you to stay where you are for now and not go back to acute care. You may feel bored now by the routine and lack of stress, but I would argue that is better for both your mental and physical health than being stressed out and overwhelmed.
I would say the majority of nurses in acute care are stressed out from the poor working conditions and deliberate understaffing that has been going on for years! Many may deny it because they can't admit they don't like nursing or feel it is a sign of weakness. Many are so emotionally invested in being a nurse they will proclaim how much they love it even though they will admit they are stressed, anxious, can't get a break or lunch.
Your emotional outbursts and nightmares from lack of resources mirrors my struggles, especially the last year. I lived with nightmares and felt dread 24 hours before my next shift started! I had similar situations where patients were left without IV access for the night as admin got rid of the IV team to save money. I totally understand that fear of what will I do if a patient needs an IV and I can't get it. Looking back, it really pisses me off because it was not my fault, nor was it yours. It was the fault of greedy mgmt that refused to provide adequate resources!
I finally put myself first, listened to my mind and body and quit. I should have done it sooner. There is no way in hell I would ever go back! The nightmares have stopped, and I feel so much better. The stress is gone and no amount of money would get me to go back. It is like heaven not being subjected to endless alarms. That is the best thing, but even now the sound of the phone really gets to me.
I implore you to listen to your body and put yourself first. More research is coming out about how harmful stress is to one's health. I felt if I didn't quit, the job would kill me thru a stroke.
I'm glad you are doing better! What type of work do you do now?
I don’t think what you described means you are not meant for acute care. I think you were put in situations beyond your control and it made you frustrated and angry. I think our healthcare has been failing for years and Covid simply illuminated the faults in our system.
I am in a similar boat. I am in preop/PACU and get bored with the redundancy of the job. I find myself getting annoyed with what I perceive as little things (like when the OR team has a conniption because I put an IV line in the right arm versus left since the patient is a difficult stick and that was the best I could give them!). The little things and lack of skills does sometimes get to me. However, every time I think I applying PRN to the ER again, I can never force myself to fill out an entire application. Or every time I go down to the ED to pick up a patient and all my former coworkers tell me “it’s so bad!” and everyone is running around like chickens with their heads cut off.....I remember why I left.
Maybe at some point, I will go back to the ED. However, I don’t think I am past the feelings of anger and frustration and incredibly unsafe situations.....the verbal and physical abuse. The going 12 to 16 hours without eating and being physically and emotionally exhausted.
I really do think our society’s version of what strength is is incredibly warped and messed up. Strength is seen as seen as staying in a job that is mentally and physically draining.....that if you leave to pursue a job that’s better for YOU, then that’s weakness. And it’s not.
I know I am so much more compassionate and less angry since leaving the ER. For me, the loss of skills is worth it. If those feelings ever change, then I can go back. However, for me, I know it’s not the right time or place to go back.
I'm glad you are doing better! What type of work do you do now?
I started early retirement and my pension. At this point, I have no plans on working in nursing. I'm just enjoying my freedom. Also I feel like I freed myself from a very abusive employer. I feel sad for those still working there.
I get updates and nothing is better. The working conditions are terrible, unsafe and management has total disrespect and contempt for the workers. They don't even bother to hide it. Consequently they are losing nursing in droves and will have to keep paying travelers crisis pay to keep the doors open! Eight nurses left since December and six more are leaving in the ER!
Specializes in Community Health, Med/Surg, ICU Stepdown.
10 hours ago, speedynurse said:
I don’t think what you described means you are not meant for acute care. I think you were put in situations beyond your control and it made you frustrated and angry. I think our healthcare has been failing for years and Covid simply illuminated the faults in our system.
I am in a similar boat. I am in preop/PACU and get bored with the redundancy of the job. I find myself getting annoyed with what I perceive as little things (like when the OR team has a conniption because I put an IV line in the right arm versus left since the patient is a difficult stick and that was the best I could give them!). The little things and lack of skills does sometimes get to me. However, every time I think I applying PRN to the ER again, I can never force myself to fill out an entire application. Or every time I go down to the ED to pick up a patient and all my former coworkers tell me “it’s so bad!” and everyone is running around like chickens with their heads cut off.....I remember why I left.
Maybe at some point, I will go back to the ED. However, I don’t think I am past the feelings of anger and frustration and incredibly unsafe situations.....the verbal and physical abuse. The going 12 to 16 hours without eating and being physically and emotionally exhausted.
I really do think our society’s version of what strength is is incredibly warped and messed up. Strength is seen as seen as staying in a job that is mentally and physically draining.....that if you leave to pursue a job that’s better for YOU, then that’s weakness. And it’s not.
I know I am so much more compassionate and less angry since leaving the ER. For me, the loss of skills is worth it. If those feelings ever change, then I can go back. However, for me, I know it’s not the right time or place to go back.
I think we're in the same boat! A little nostalgic for the good parts of acute care and our former colleagues, but not quite enough to actually go back! LOL
6 hours ago, brandy1017 said:
I started early retirement and my pension. At this point, I have no plans on working in nursing. I'm just enjoying my freedom. Also I feel like I freed myself from a very abusive employer. I feel sad for those still working there.
I get updates and nothing is better. The working conditions are terrible, unsafe and management has total disrespect and contempt for the workers. They don't even bother to hide it. Consequently they are losing nursing in droves and will have to keep paying travelers crisis pay to keep the doors open! Eight nurses left since December and six more are leaving in the ER!
Good for you! That does NOT sound like a good place to work
LibraNurse27, BSN, RN
972 Posts
I'm glad you are doing better! What type of work do you do now?