Advice please!!

[edp855]

Hello everyone,

I am feeling very stuck as to what I want to do in the future so I thought I'd get some advice here. I am hitting my one year mark as a new nurse in 2 months. The only reason I started nursing school was to ultimately become a CRNA. That was also my goal for moving across the country to start my new grad ICU program at one of the top hospitals in the US. However, I had a horrible experience in the ICU and ended up leaving about 5 months in. I had worked in ICUs as a tech during nursing school so I knew what it entailed, but it was mostly because of the lateral violence that I just felt unsafe, unsupported, and pretty much miserable in the ICU. On top of that, all my patients were ventilated and very few patients improved. I had moved for this job so I was trying my best to stick it through, but it was so difficult that I just ended up throwing in the towel. Although I must say, I loved titrating drugs and keeping patients hemodynamically stable. I love the critical thinking aspect of it and I actually miss it. Anyways, I switched units to a surgical floor with tele and IMC beds. It was a breath of fresh air!!!! Nurses were nice and supportive. I could educate and talk to my patients. My patients were grateful and they actually IMPROVED and went home. I was very happy because I felt like I finally remembered the reason why I wanted to be a nurse in the first place.

I am slowly getting ready to apply for NP schools. I really don't think I'll like what acute care NPs do because I work with them everyday and I see what they do. I would prefer going to FNP school because I want to focus on health promotion and education in an outpatient setting. I think that really makes me happy. But every single time I think about going to school, one part of my heart is aching for CRNA school. I'm not sure if it is because it was such a long time goal of mine and I feel like I gave up on it or if I should just give the ICU another chance because not all ICUs are horrible to new grads. I think ultimately, I would be very happy as an FNP. However, I want the education of a CRNA, i feel like there is so much more I can learn. Maybe even have the day that I can do a spinal block which has been a long time dream of mine. I feel so wishy washy about this. Should I just go for FNP school because that is something that I know is a good fit for my personality? Or should I give it another go and go for CRNA school even if it takes a lot longer? What do you guys think?

[Snatchedwig, BSN, CNA, LPN, RN]

I never understand why people ask strangers for life decisions. But for the sake of trying to help and guide you. Ms. Edp855, imagine when you are in your old age and reminiscing, would you feel fulfilled as a FNP? What does your heart say? I think you already know but maybe seeking confirmation to take that leap.

[Nurse SMS, MSN, RN]

Well, the first thing that comes to mind is that the FNP market in many areas is completely saturated with stagnant to falling wages. You will need to look carefully and consider that most opportunities for that are going to be more rural and potentially lower pay.

As far as FNP being an end to your education, that's just silly. Start looking around at high achieving RNs and you will find that their initial advanced degree is only the first thing they did to elevate themselves.

If you like "health promotion and education in an outpatient setting" and the like, CRNA makes zero sense. Your patients won't even be awake. I have to wonder if this is either money driven, FOMO or simply the regret of letting go of something you thought you wanted, because it seems, frankly, grossly illogical.