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Discussion

Abuse of nurses

I’ve been really struggling lately at work. Not only is the management absent and non responsive, but as a new charge nurse I was called into a room to an irate patient who attacked me professionally and personally (my appearance). My crime? Other than existing? Trying to explain why they were on contact isolation. The CNA had gowned up and added a mask, but the patient didn’t blame her, she blamed me. I just had to walk away and get the supervisor. To top it off, while the supervisor tried to talk her down from going AMA, she said the only way she’d stay was if I apologized. Umm, no!

Featured Replies

I'm sorry to say, but I am laughing at this. I have dealt with too many difficult patients and family! Some people can be so awful! It doesn't sound like your management is helping either. I'm thankful that my management tries to resolve issues without throwing me under the bus.

I learned how to deal with difficult people in hospice. Those patients and family members are in major crisis mode. They are not always the nicest and to make matters worse, you are in their home. I think it's best to never escalate your voice to their level, acknowledge that they are facing a tough situation "being on isolation is just that, isolating. It must have been difficult to not be able to see the CNA smile". Let them vent, so they feel like you are listening. Realize that these people are facing tough issues, probably have mental health challenges and use that knowledge to NEVER take anything personally (super challenging, I know!). But still state simply "personal insults are inappropriate, please keep your comments on topic". Also, if personal insults continue tell them "I will not tolerate this behavior", and walk out if needed.

Hope this helps.

  • Author

Yeah it’s ok. I just find it sad that people feel free to insult and scream at others who are there to help. It’s the culture we’ve come to accept and I hate that it’s become the norm.

I've been fortunate enough where most of patients have been pretty cool/chill/nice. I've come across just a few "unruly" patients. Yeah the verbal abuse is there. Do I care? Not really. Any insults the patients throw at me means nothing. I'm there to do my job and if they don't want the care, that's their decision. I'm a pretty chill bro and play neutral when I come across these kind of patients. As a nurse, should I be more persuasive? Yes, I try but I'm not gonna go out of my way to get them to listen and agree with the care if they don't want. If they don't want the care, I chart as is, and it's there decision. Then again, I'm sure we all come across that unruly patient that DOES want the care but remains unruly. Just gotta get through that shift and hope the patient is gone the next time you come back. The "abuse" will always be there, but being the victim, you gotta put your mind to it at how you will deal with it. I simply brush it off. No, I'm not ignoring it, but it's something that I don't need to waste my time chasing after or fixing. Some people in the world don't change, at least I've tried.

  • Experts

I have found it hard, in my new, job adjusting to how “complaints” are dealt with. Sometimes it seems like people can say anything to or about nurses with impunity, in a hospital setting. Keeping focused on the fact that the patient is legitimately sick can be hard when they are “firing” colleagues and making stuff up about them and you.

Sometimes I could communicate better, sometimes people just want to argue with nurses or be crappy. We are an easy target, that much is clear. I’ve learned something with each of these patients. Usually the hard way.

I’m trying not to be surprised by the BS anymore. Plus management will co-sign the BS of patients and family all day. I’d like to say it isn’t hurtful. Sometimes it is.

I am having a hard time with demanding families and patients complaining to management that there were problems or that I was rude. For instance today a pt had a very low bp 77/30 and her sister constantly demanded that I recheck her bp and give pain meds. Im talking every 5 min.I did this and as the pts bp did not come up much and she almost passed out pain med couldn't be given. Sister took a break and apparently called management. The dr discharged this pt and she was informed not to take pain meds at home until her bp came up. I had 5 other pts the cna’s were not helping. About 3 hrs after this pt was discharged I was sent home due to her complaints to management.The pts daughter had complained to management about the night shift nurse doing the same thing but she was not escorted out. Im sure Im fired but how do I explain this to a possible new employer.

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