A story for the newbies....

Published

Several months ago, I went on several interviews right after graduation. I went to a hospital in the city that is known for its outstanding medical staff. Was not sure what to expect when I interviewed. But, it was a delightful interview. I interviewed first with the nurse recruter, then she took me down stairs to meet with the ICU manager, then that manager took me up to the Oncology/hematology manager. ( those were the positions I applied for)

Both units were outstanding, the demenor of the employees on the floor was great. I really had a good feeling about this hospital.

There was two reasons I chose the oncology floor. Two employees. They stood out to me. One asked questions about me, my personal life ( such as if I had children or married) I took the questions that she asked me as if she was very interested in me as a person. I felt she was pretty, and very well put together and someone that was going to be most helpful and someone that I would learn from.

So several weeks later I start the job. The first couple of days the perceptor I was with would show me around and teach me things that nursing school dont prepare you for. I saw the lady that I felt was so put together and so nice. My preceptor introduced me to her again and I was trying to be interesting and kind. Ummm, well she blew me off. I took it, as, you are new here. Dont talk to me like you know me. But, if you know me, I dont ever meet a stranger. I try to find things to talk to people about that makes them feel good about themselves

So, my feelings get a little hurt, but I am not ready to write her off yet.

I am in now 6+/- weeks of orientation. Bringing my orientation book home nightly, looking up information on the cancers that I have seen. Look further into the reasons some of the medications are given.. so on.

I am doing well. My preceptor is telling me that she truely believes that I am smart and I will do fine in this area of nursing.

Week 7 or so, my preceptor goes on vacation. I get to work with the pretty lady who was so kind to me on my interview day. OMG! She rode me like you would not believe. She made me feel so stupid and so unworthy that I left on one occasion thinking, am I truely cut out for this? Maybe I should quit....

My preceptor came back, and I mentioned to her that how I felt. How nervous the pretty lady made me feel. How I couldnt remember how to do a blood pressure cause I was afraid she would tell me her way of doing it would be. How I was afraid to do anything because of the suttle insults I would get. My preceptor responded with.... " I was afraid of that"

I didnt share this information with my preceptor to be a back stabber, I just wanted her to know if I was off my game, it was simply nerves.

My confidence comes back... feeling really good about how much I have grown. I am put into a class for further education. So, my schedule is off a little and in order to get my hours, I was placed with the pretty lady preceptor again. She was so terrible to me. She rode me so hard. My confidence level was in the toilet.... 12 hours of this. I finally said to her you are a control freak arent you? ( my BS cup was full) Where I come from that is called a micro-manager! Well, needless to say 20 minutes later she was in the managers office. What would think she said to them? Well I got the picture when 20 min or so after she exited the office, she pulled me into the conference room to ask me how I felt I was doing. If I felt I was ready to be off of orientation in two weeks.

I was offended... I couldnt beleive she would make horrible assumptions about me after only working with me for three days.

The next day that I worked. I asked the manager to meet with me alone. ( cause the coordinator and others that were in the office are all really good friends) So we met. I explained to her, that I was here to do a good job. I am not someone who gets involved with he said she said, but, I had a concern of what the pretty nurse had said about me and how she treated me. Thank goodness, my manager told me that she had every confidence in me. She knew that I was a person who put allot of pressure on myself to do a good job. She knew that I continued with educating my self after work hours. She said that she knew I was safe to work with patients and not to let this bother me. And above everything else, she knew that I would not do anything that I was not confiendent to do. I would ask the question first. Thank God, someone other then my preceptor saw in me what she did. I felt that the conversation pretty lady had behind close doors could really put a bad taste about me in others mouths.

So, I wanted to share with newbies like myself that if you work hard, and prove yourself to others that someone kind does see the good in you and your abilities.

Keep your head up. Be confident in what you know and be confident in what you dont.

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Specializes in Psych.

Good advice to remember. I wonder why she was so nice to you at first? Seemed to be out of character for her.

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Good advice to remember. I wonder why she was so nice to you at first? Seemed to be out of character for her.

Probably because she was with a nurse manager or HR person, the pretty on the outside only nurse was probably trying to sell herself to the higher ups. I see it all the time, fortunately not presonally.

I am glad that things are going well for you oncologyrn!

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Specializes in FNP, Peds, Epilepsy, Mgt., Occ. Ed.

I'll bet the next time your "phony meter" will go off like crazy around someone like her!

I'm glad you have a good preceptor and manager, both of whom know how to treat a new person.

Oh, and I'll also bet that the "pretty lady" doesn't look nearly so pretty to you now!!

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Good advice to remember. I wonder why she was so nice to you at first? Seemed to be out of character for her.

I think she was sizing me up. To see how extensive my education was. To see if I had something to gain by befriending me. She was only pleasant consistanly to people whom she feels she has somthing to gain, I have figured out. She calls one doc, who is about 33 years old by her first name. And lights up like a christmas tree when she walks onto the floor.

It is all good, I dont play games. So, no worries here.

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Specializes in ICU/PCU/Infusion.

I think you've handled your situation as well as (or BETTER!) than lots of other folks woud have. You did all the right things, went up the chain of command, and voiced your opinions to the right people.

Obviously, you had a steep learning curve (don't we all?) and I for one think you are doing great and just keep on keepin' on. Stay out of the messes, and keep your shield up at all costs with this "pretty lady". As if you didn't know that one already, ;) .

Congrats on becoming an RN!

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I think you've handled your situation as well as (or BETTER!) than lots of other folks woud have. You did all the right things, went up the chain of command, and voiced your opinions to the right people.

Obviously, you had a steep learning curve (don't we all?) and I for one think you are doing great and just keep on keepin' on. Stay out of the messes, and keep your shield up at all costs with this "pretty lady". As if you didn't know that one already, ;) .

Congrats on becoming an RN!

I really appreciate the comment. Prior to becoming a nurse I worked in a management position. So, I am pretty keen to closed door conversations, and the people who initate them.

That being said, I know how to present a case to managers in a "sandwich" manner. Always deliver bad news with a positive upside. I have been through all of it before.

Also, I was a LPN prior to becoming a RN, so some of her "Assessment" c/o about me was unfair and uncalled for. But, I will continue to maintain a professional realationship, I just will not go out for a drink with her.

To me it is just amazing how cruel and decetful people who are supposed to be in a compassionate role can acually be.

I still love my job, I love the patients I take care of and I can not see me leaving any time soon. I love being a nurse!

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Whoa, OncologyRN07, it's like you are describing one of my co-workers. Thanks for bringing this personality type out into the open.

Families LOVE this RN, as do new nurses. The new nurses just don't know she is badmouthing them whenever they turn around. It takes a few weeks to see the true colors. I think she likes to feel important. She will even tell physicians who (she thinks) is a good nurse and who is not, and gossip with them. She is so skilled at putting on that "I'm supportive" face, somewhat grandmotherly, but it's a total lie. Those of us who work with her know. Everyone else thinks she is wonderful.

This RN once tried to make me feel like it was my fault a patient's mother started crying when her son was discharged (I did the discharge). She gave mom a hug, said "there there" and shot me evil looks over the woman's shoulder. I knew it wasn't my fault. It was about something totally unrelated. But she wanted to blame it on me when she told the story later to everyone else.

You did a great job in handling this type of person. It sounds like everyone on your unit knows of this RN's reputation - they won't take her seriously, whatever she says about you. Keep up the good work

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Specializes in RN CRRN.
Several months ago, I went on several interviews right after graduation. I went to a hospital in the city that is known for its outstanding medical staff. Was not sure what to expect when I interviewed. But, it was a delightful interview. I interviewed first with the nurse recruter, then she took me down stairs to meet with the ICU manager, then that manager took me up to the Oncology/hematology manager. ( those were the positions I applied for)

Both units were outstanding, the demenor of the employees on the floor was great. I really had a good feeling about this hospital.

There was two reasons I chose the oncology floor. Two employees. They stood out to me. One asked questions about me, my personal life ( such as if I had children or married) I took the questions that she asked me as if she was very interested in me as a person. I felt she was pretty, and very well put together and someone that was going to be most helpful and someone that I would learn from.

So several weeks later I start the job. The first couple of days the perceptor I was with would show me around and teach me things that nursing school dont prepare you for. I saw the lady that I felt was so put together and so nice. My preceptor introduced me to her again and I was trying to be interesting and kind. Ummm, well she blew me off. I took it, as, you are new here. Dont talk to me like you know me. But, if you know me, I dont ever meet a stranger. I try to find things to talk to people about that makes them feel good about themselves

So, my feelings get a little hurt, but I am not ready to write her off yet.

I am in now 6+/- weeks of orientation. Bringing my orientation book home nightly, looking up information on the cancers that I have seen. Look further into the reasons some of the medications are given.. so on.

I am doing well. My preceptor is telling me that she truely believes that I am smart and I will do fine in this area of nursing.

Week 7 or so, my preceptor goes on vacation. I get to work with the pretty lady who was so kind to me on my interview day. OMG! She rode me like you would not believe. She made me feel so stupid and so unworthy that I left on one occasion thinking, am I truely cut out for this? Maybe I should quit....

My preceptor came back, and I mentioned to her that how I felt. How nervous the pretty lady made me feel. How I couldnt remember how to do a blood pressure cause I was afraid she would tell me her way of doing it would be. How I was afraid to do anything because of the suttle insults I would get. My preceptor responded with.... " I was afraid of that"

I didnt share this information with my preceptor to be a back stabber, I just wanted her to know if I was off my game, it was simply nerves.

My confidence comes back... feeling really good about how much I have grown. I am put into a class for further education. So, my schedule is off a little and in order to get my hours, I was placed with the pretty lady preceptor again. She was so terrible to me. She rode me so hard. My confidence level was in the toilet.... 12 hours of this. I finally said to her you are a control freak arent you? ( my BS cup was full) Where I come from that is called a micro-manager! Well, needless to say 20 minutes later she was in the managers office. What would think she said to them? Well I got the picture when 20 min or so after she exited the office, she pulled me into the conference room to ask me how I felt I was doing. If I felt I was ready to be off of orientation in two weeks.

I was offended... I couldnt beleive she would make horrible assumptions about me after only working with me for three days.

The next day that I worked. I asked the manager to meet with me alone. ( cause the coordinator and others that were in the office are all really good friends) So we met. I explained to her, that I was here to do a good job. I am not someone who gets involved with he said she said, but, I had a concern of what the pretty nurse had said about me and how she treated me. Thank goodness, my manager told me that she had every confidence in me. She knew that I was a person who put allot of pressure on myself to do a good job. She knew that I continued with educating my self after work hours. She said that she knew I was safe to work with patients and not to let this bother me. And above everything else, she knew that I would not do anything that I was not confiendent to do. I would ask the question first. Thank God, someone other then my preceptor saw in me what she did. I felt that the conversation pretty lady had behind close doors could really put a bad taste about me in others mouths.

So, I wanted to share with newbies like myself that if you work hard, and prove yourself to others that someone kind does see the good in you and your abilities.

Keep your head up. Be confident in what you know and be confident in what you dont.

The fact that she asked you personal questions sets off warning bells at your interview, she cannot do that...wants to know how available you will be-not interested in you (if you will have sick kids, trips with family, need time off for ball games etc) not being nice, I was asked these questions too, I chose the other unit that did not.:monkeydance:

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