A resident died.

nursemary9, BSN, RN · Sep 28, 2006

Hi

I'm so sorry for your loss!!:icon_hug: :icon_hug: :icon_hug:

I know, some of the folks sure do get to you!

Mary Ann

foxxcat · Oct 13, 2006

Dear Nurse

You will always remember this guy,the good and the bad just be glad you had the chance to meet him and get to know him

banditrn · Oct 14, 2006

Thanks for your words. :) I still miss him - he was always good for a chuckle or two - like I said, you couldn't stay mad at him.

BoomerRN · Oct 14, 2006

Just got word that one of our residents passed away. This was an old fella that I thought would outlive me. And I know that it's the expectation that everyone will pass on sooner or later - it's just sad when you lose them.
This fella could be really irritating sometimes, because he was on his lite a lot - but you really couldn't get angry with him. He didn't sleep much at nite, and was confused, and a lot of times you'd just laugh when you went in to see him - one nite he put on his lite to tell me that they'd had grilled hot dogs for supper and that they tasted so good!!:wink2:
I have to work tonite, and it's not going to be the same.

I know exactly how you feel. Years ago when I returned from a vacation I learned that my favorite elderly gentleman had died. He had fallen down the stairs while in his w/c. (It was a tragic accident, he got away from the staff and somehow got into the kitchen and the basement stairs were located here). I loved that old fella. He was a retired policeman and had dementia and we had to watch him at times because he could be mean and try to hit you, but also could be very sweet. I remember I was sitting at the nurses station one day and saw him heading toward an outside door. I said "Frank!" and immediately he raised his hands and turned the w/c around with a smile on his face and said: "You caught me, I give up." One morning I came in and he was sitting in a geri-chair in the hallway. I asked the na's what's going on and they said he had urinated in a glass (plastic) and wouldn't give it to them and was trying to throw it on them. I snuck up behind him and tipped the contents of the glass on the floor and he threw the glass and it broke into a million pieces. He could also be lovable and would hug you and tell you you were his baby. There are many other memories I have of him and his wonderful wife. She was a classy woman. She had beautiful hair of which she wore up in a pretty style and wore nice clothes. She would get exasperated at him and say "I don't know why he acts that way." (We had told her that Frank couldn't help being this way). Both of them were very close to me over the few years he was at this facility. I have since moved to another state, but this is one resident that was very special to me and I will always remember him and his wife.

TrudyRN · Oct 14, 2006

We do get attached to some of our patients, don't we? Sigh and ((((you)))).

banditrn · Oct 16, 2006

Yes, some of them really do get to you!! There are a few of the ladies I interact with on my med rounds that make it all worthwhile - the one I joke with back and forth, telling her I'm glad it's her taking the crushed meds in pudding, and she says she wishes I could take them, and so on. Just a lovely woman. Then there's the one down the hall who I give eye gtts to - she has this beautiful, toothless smile, that makes me happy every time I see it.

There are just so many of them - there's a lovely woman who is only about 5 years older than I, and I like to stop every morning to tell her how nice she looks - it must mean something to her, too, to have someone notice - the day staff always report that she is 'nasty' to them, but I've never, ever had her behave like that.

Then theres the LOM with dementia who sits in the lobby and makes growling noises at the LOL's - one day I growled backed, and we both cracked up!! I don't think he's quite as demented as he makes out sometimes.:)

I could go on and on, as I'm sure all of you could. I just wish I could make their lives perfect for them.

jnette, ASN, EMT-I · Oct 23, 2006

You sound lkike a wonderful, caring, compassionate nurse, whose heart aches to make the world a brighter place for your patients.

I'm so very sorry about the loss of your dear patient. It hurts every time. Don't let anyone tell you it "gets better with time" or you'll "gradually adjust". You don't. As long as you invest some of yourself into these fragile lives, you will grieve for them when they pass, for with them, you will also have lost a tiny part of yourself.

I've been there more times than I care to count.. and each one was so very special.

The comforting thing in it all is knowing that there are so many more yet to pour your heart into, all who will benefit from your love and caring just as this one did... and that the one who passed would want you to keep passing it on. There are so many... so very many... who need your touch and compassion.. your laughter and your smile...your hugs and even your occasional tear shed with them.

Keep on.

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))