Being a mom and a wife are admirable goals
. I am both, and they are my most important jobs. They are also the most difficult, and the ones I love the most!
I started out with my ASN, and got preggers during the final semester. I landed a new grad nursing job in 2008, but I only got it because I was an internal applicant (I worked for the hospital as a nurses aide). This is my #1 advice to you regardless of which degree you pursue - get at least a part time job in a good hospital during nursing school. I am now going back to school online at UMass Boston to get my bachelor's. Part of the reason is that there is no current nursing shortage. That is a myth. There may in fact not be enough nurses, but the fact remains that no one is hiring, especially new grads. I live in Massachusetts but I've heard this is true in other states. And when there are lots of nurses (especially new grads) competing for jobs, they usually take bachelor's nurses over associates, especially for new grads. With seasoned nurses it is a little different because experience counts for a lot. But as a new grad you have none.
I have to tell you that if you ever found yourself needing to go back to get your BSN after you have kids - it sucks. Especially if all you want to do is be home with your kids like me. It sucks. So if you think you might need it one day, get it out of the way. Part of me wants to say err on the side of more education in case the economy sours again and your fiance/husband is out of work or underemployed. (Not to mention, 70K a year won't support a family with kids, especially when paying off student loans). But I would 100% advocate getting it at a state school which is much cheaper. At the end of the day, you will likely have student loans. Look online at 2-year and 4-year colleges/universities and find the cost per credit (including tuition and fees), and how many credits you'll need to graduate. Basically, it cost as much for me to get my ASN as I would have paid for 1.5 years of a 4-year BSN course. I am now getting my BSN online at UMass Boston at a decent rate, and with modest tuition help from my hospital, so I will have saved money overall, but at the sacrifice of time away from my kids. Alternately, I could have done my ASN then directly applied to the RN-to-BSN program, then had kids, but that didn't happen. Look at what educational opportunities are available to you in your state.
As a side note, all my community college courses were transferable as the state U has a partnership with my community college - something to look into. You should calculate that you have at least a year of pre-req's prior to entering into a community college ASN degree program. For this reason, doing the ASN to BSN route may actually take longer than 4 years. And working after an ASN while you're getting a BSN can be good and bad; you're making money, but you're also taking time away from study, adding a lot of stress. The one reason I think a BSN is valuable simply for the sake of better nursing is that it gives you a good foundation for understanding nursing research, which helps you make better autonomous evidence-based decisions. My heart is honestly with my kids at all times, but since I'm in a profession in which I'm responsible for taking care of people, I suppose it's best to be the best nurse I can be. So I'm glad I'm getting my BSN.
Ultimately, I applaud your decision to get your education and a solid career if anything were to not work out with your fiancee. SUCH a wise decision! And nursing is so flexible that even with kids, you can work part time or per diem and have flexible shifts (I do 3p-11p and have the morning with my toddlers). BTW, I am also an artist and hate school lol. But do it and study hard, because it is worth it!!!