This morning I woke up and to find that I had an email from my university's college of nursing. I've been so excited for this email because I was sure I was going to get in this time. I've been rejected from the college of nursing twice before, and since I've already met all the prerequisites, I've been taking upper level science courses towards a Human Biology degree. I've worked really hard and got a 4.0 in Orgo 1 and 2, plus the lab (not required for nursing). I've 4.0 a 400 level biochemistry, and pharmacology. This raised my GPA to a 3.6. At the same time I got a job working as a ED Scribe, and continued to volunteer tutoring at risk children in literacy. I got two strong letters of recommendation, one from a former CNA instructor, and another from a supervisor when I volunteered in the ED. I've worked so hard and put so much time into getting accepted into this damn nursing program. I really thought I would get in this time.
So when I saw the email, I excitedly skimmed to the part "however, you have not been selected for admission". It didn't hit me until I called my mom to tell her the news. During the call I couldn't speak, and I had to hang up so she wouldn't know that I was crying. I had remained positive after my 2 previous failed attempts; however this time, I can't deny the sadness and anger I feel. I skipped all my classes today and sat in my bed trying to convince myself that everything will be okay, that I can finish up my Human Biology degree and apply into Med, Dentistry, or Pharmacology. The problem is, I can't lie to myself and deny the truth, that all I ever wanted was to be a nurse. I apologize for this lengthy rant, I just needed some place to get my thoughts down. I can't speak to anyone about this because it gets difficult to hold back the tears.