Hospital Bloopers

  1. did you write these on your charts???

    hospital bloopers

    actual writings from hospital charts

    1. the patient refused autopsy.

    2. the patient has no previous history of suicides.

    3. patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.

    4. she has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very
    hot in bed last night.

    5. patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

    6. on the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it
    disappeared.

    7. the patient is tearful and crying constantly. she also appears to be
    depressed.

    8. the patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

    9. discharge status: alive but without permission

    10. healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert but
    forgetful.

    11. patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

    12. she is numb from her toes down.

    13. while in er, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

    14. the skin was moist and dry.

    15. occasional, constant infrequent headaches.

    16. patient was alert and unresponsive.

    17. rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid

    18. she stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she
    got a divorce.

    19. i saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical
    therapy.

    20. both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.

    21. examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.

    22. the lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

    23. skin: somewhat pale but present.

    24. the pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

    25. patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
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  2. 8 Comments

  3. by   boyter
    thanks, that was beautiful. I havent laughed that hard in a long time
  4. by   Darlene K.
    :chuckle
  5. by   queenbeelws
    I think I'm gonna share these with my students in documentation class!! TFS
  6. by   lady_inred
    Funny,huh!:chuckle



    Quote from boyter
    thanks, that was beautiful. I havent laughed that hard in a long time
  7. by   lady_inred
    Yeah,let them not do same mistakes that other Doctors or Nurses do!:chuckle


    Quote from queenbeelws
    I think I'm gonna share these with my students in documentation class!! TFS
  8. by   rn in 3 years
    I can TOTALLY relate to the teenage one
  9. by   sjb2005
    I can't forget that time I was hooking up some IV Rifampin. I forgot to close the line after priming and red medicine ended up on the floor. What a koolaid stain. I think the red stain is still there. Glad they didn't charge me for it. LOL
  10. by   Spatialized
    One once wrote, "call me for a stable arrhythmia"
    so the consensus was to call him for asystole...whcih BTW, never happened.

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