Funniest real orders you have seen in a chart? - page 55

To start things off, the best and funniest order I have seen on a chart, was in the discharge instructions for a trauma patient. It read simply Darwin Consult and was signed by the... Read More

  1. by   ShirleyBRN
    Quote from RetiredTooSoon
    It may be a Europe/Australia/NZ thing; all of the websites I've seen that involve IV acetaminophen have all been from Europe, Australia or NZ, although there are some clinical trials for the drug coming up on clinicaltrials.gov.
    Why do we need IV Tylenol when IV Toradol does the same thing? And apparently a whole lot less expensively?
  2. by   ShirleyBRN
    Quote from HollyHobby
    "Puree bacon and put down NG tube."
    From a cardiologist!

    We have a nurse on our unit who collects funny orders, errors in dictation, or anything else that gets messed up when written and/or put into the computer by the unit clerk. Whenever we come across something hilarious, we put a copy in her mailbox. A few good ones:

    "CT of Elvis, STAT". Instead of "CT of pelvis". (Sorry, but Elvis has left the building.)

    We had one doc who always dictated a very thorough H&P, including details about the patient's sexual history, pets in the home, etc. I came across this one, which implied something the doc surely didn't mean:
    "Pt has had 12 sexual partners, one dog."

    My personal favorite: "Propofol drip, titrate for seduction." (Instead of sedation.)
    In Progress notes many years ago. Pt has had recent onset of intermittent chest pain. Pt also recently married much younger man. Suspect correlation.
  3. by   ckgusto47
    Had a patient that was going into Nicotine withdrawal and ready to crawl out of his skin if he wasn't allowed to smoke, so the doc wrote the order "OK to visit ducks". At our facility there is a pond out front with ducks and a conveniently placed "smoking area". I don't condone smoking, but if it takes a crazy person off my hands, I'm all for it!
  4. by   naturopathlpn
    Quote from nu one
    The weirdest I encountered was coffee enema Q1... and it had to be brewed, not instant coffee.... and we did it!!!

    .....imagine having your butt having a coffee break...

    Hillarious but true. The alkaloids stimulate both the liver and spleen to release toxins. It was a week before I could look at a latte again though....
  5. by   FranEMTnurse
    Quote from naturopathlpn
    Hillarious but true. The alkaloids stimulate both the liver and spleen to release toxins. It was a week before I could look at a latte again though....
    No doubt.
  6. by   MrsW1109
    Quote from naturopathlpn
    Hillarious but true. The alkaloids stimulate both the liver and spleen to release toxins. It was a week before I could look at a latte again though....

    Wow!! I'll second you on that one... Coffee will definitely not be the same for me!
  7. by   RunnerNurse09
    Quote from tiger
    ultrasound lle. r/o dvd
    LOL!
  8. by   cherrybreeze
    Quote from ShirleyBRN
    Why do we need IV Tylenol when IV Toradol does the same thing? And apparently a whole lot less expensively?
    Not the same thing at all....a lot of people can't take anti inflammatories (if they have bleeding problems, allergies, etc) and Toradol is contraindicated in renal insuffieciency (can't give it to anyone with an elevated creatinine, hx of stomach ulcers, etc etc). IV tylenol would be safe in those cases.
  9. by   stoli
    <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><meta name="ProgId" content="Word.Document"><meta name="Generator" content="Microsoft Word 11"><meta name="Originator" content="Microsoft Word 11"><link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5Cstoli%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsoh tml1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <wontGrowAutofit/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" LatentStyleCount="156"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><style> <!-- /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-parent:""; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";} @page Section1 {size:8.5in 11.0in; margin:1.0in 1.25in 1.0in 1.25in; mso-header-margin:.5in; mso-footer-margin:.5in; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} --> </style><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-ansi-language:#0400; mso-fareast-language:#0400; mso-bidi-language:#0400;} </style> <![endif]-->ER H&P stated "no tombstones present' on a pt in for a MI. Pulmonologist on the case started laughing when he read this thinking the ER doc was referring to the pt dying not ST elevation
  10. by   stoli
    <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><meta name="ProgId" content="Word.Document"><meta name="Generator" content="Microsoft Word 11"><meta name="Originator" content="Microsoft Word 11"><link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5Cstoli%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsoh tml1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <wontGrowAutofit/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" LatentStyleCount="156"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><style> <!-- /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-parent:""; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";} @page Section1 {size:8.5in 11.0in; margin:1.0in 1.25in 1.0in 1.25in; mso-header-margin:.5in; mso-footer-margin:.5in; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} --> </style><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-ansi-language:#0400; mso-fareast-language:#0400; mso-bidi-language:#0400;} </style> <![endif]--> Pt admitted to CCU OD of Norvasc .Was looking grey , spo2 76% getting ready to intubate.Pulmonologist bedside asked the pt "so why did you want to hurt yourself" pt replied " I lost my job and am having money problems" , Pulmonologist "Well how do you plan to pay my bill?" He was kidding, but the pt didn't realize that and offered to make payments.
    Same Doc thanks chronic smokers for putting his kids thru college.
  11. by   infermierequebecoise
    We had this patient in med-surg who was in severe respiratory acidosis, resident and ER doc come for the code, and once the pt was stable, the ER doc leaves the resident alone to prepare for transfer to ICU. Well the res. decides to give plavix and ASA, which is fine..except the pt was intubated and unconscious. When I went to clarify the order, he gave me a blank look, didnt get what was wrong, until I asked for a route. Then he just blushed and said he'd go install an NG tube...god sometimes you just have to take them by the hand and walk them through everything!!
  12. by   BSNBritt
    I've seen "change risperidone 1mg QHS to risperidone 1mg QHS"
    but my favorite was when an ANP wrote "advair and combivent"..................ummmm anything missing there???
  13. by   Vikingkitten
    Quote from nu one
    The weirdest I encountered was coffee enema Q1... and it had to be brewed, not instant coffee.... and we did it!!!

    .....imagine having your butt having a coffee break...

    I have to ask, was that with Cream and Sugar?!!!

    Pulled that one in class in Medic's school!
    Got dropped for LOTS of push-ups!
    Last edit by Vikingkitten on Sep 27, '10 : Reason: mispelled word

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