Woman blames assisted-care facility when her mother dies of a stroke - page 2

by visionary123 3,114 Views | 17 Comments

I read an article in the newspaper (StarTribune, March 12, 2013) tonight. The front page title caught my attention "FAMILIES WANT VOICE IN NURSING INQUIRIES". However, after reading the first couple paragraphs, I couldn't even... Read More


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    Quote from visionary123
    I don't get it - is it really that bad out there now that people don't expect their loved ones to ever die of natural causes? And when they do, it has to be someone else's fault?
    Yes, it is exactly that bad, in a minority of families. Fortunately, it is a minority ... though a distressingly large one.

    On a regular basis I encounter people who have clearly never, ever given thought to the inevitable phases of life and passage of time. Their reality is simply an ever-present NOW. I have taken care of patients whose families were just *shocked* when told that the outlook was grim for their emaciated, dusky-colored grandmother covered in decubitii and with stridorous respirations.

    And yes, this is exactly the type of person who looks for fault, because things don't go their way.
    psu_213, LibraSunCNM, Nola009, and 5 others like this.
  2. 0
    A year later, maybe this helps you folks figure it out....if you're providing appropriate care and following the law, there should be no problem with asking questions. In addition, this goes well beyond the elderly into anyone in any facility that requires 24/7 care. The assisted living facilities that aren't willing to provide answers via records, medication authorizations and questionable moves from nursing homes to assisted living with serious symptoms unresolved, need to be questioned ... By the way, the story goes well beyond this thread. Stay tuned.... Minnesota Woman Wants New State Law to Hold Doctors Accountable | KSTP TV - Minneapolis and St. Paul
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    Quote from Altra
    ... Their reality is simply an ever-present NOW...
    Liked your phraseology!
    psu_213 likes this.
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    Quote from Rose_Queen
    ... P.S. 51 states? When did we get another one?
    We must've been sleeping in when this happened.
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    I'm taking it that the daughter's principal beef is that the State investigators never even bothered to hear her out.

    (But who knows what her underlying theory was. And perhaps the newspaper didn't wanna publish the reason(s) without having some response from the agency.)
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    Quote from Rose_Queen
    ... in my area, the coroner gets called for every single death. He or one of his designees makes the determination whether or not the death becomes a coroner's case... We have many cases that become coroner's cases...
    Similarly at two facilities I worked at -- in two different States -- we were required to notify the ME.

    However, never was a case opened.
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    I've had a "full code" 90ish patient tell me that having nurses to give her her medications isnt enough. That she felt like she needed a doctor to call her and get after her every day about taking her meds. Knowledge was assessed and pt edu was given (q 2-3x/day) regarding the importance of taking meds. She even said that she had always been healthy and couldn't understand WHY she'd had a few (fairly minor) health probs. The family bought into this mindset wholeheartedly, and we staff were continually scrutinized by them
    visionary123 likes this.
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    I feel sort of like we have built a house on sand relative to death and dying in health care.
    With patients, we show them the pretties, we talk about the pretties, we admire the pretty blue sky, we walk patients and families through and examine all the nice amenities.
    We never talk about the storm. We never talk about the tides that erode the foundation. We, in fact, don't do anything to prepare for the inevitable fall of the house.

    And then when the house falls and the owners are angry and upset, we wonder why. Weren't you responsible for the "maintenance and upkeep"? they shout? "What about your medical plan, and all of the things you did"?

    Wouldn't it just be easier to tell people that, as it stands now, the COPD, Diabetes, CHF, Dementia, etc WILL result in your death. We are powerless to stop it, we can't cure it, and sometimes we cannot even slow it down much with drugs and surgeries. GRANDMA will die from this, when, well can't say for sure, but death...yeah on the agenda.

    That might free us up to pursue some health behaviors which might enrich and improve their quality of life, well before the hospice phase.
    Nola009, visionary123, hope3456, and 4 others like this.


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