I know this is a pretty old thread, but wanted to throw in my two cents. I have been a recovering alcoholic for over 23 years & was recently faced with the reality of how "cunning, baffling, & powerful" the disease is. A few weeks ago, I was faced with a situation that completely overwhelmed me emotionally. After crying for about a half hour, I found myself getting into my car to go to the liquor store. I have not had an urge to drink in more than 2 decades & this sneaked up on me out of nowhere. When I realized what I was doing, I went back in the house, called my sponsor, & met her at meeting that evening. I'm sharing this just to make the point that no matter how long you have been sober, you will never be recovered. It is a lifelong fight for sanity.