I thought I did the right thing and I am glad I did. But, when I am at my low, having my mom (who is also a nurse...with a license in the same state as me) telling me that I should have lied and I wouldn't be in this situation, it's hard to deal with.
Yes, I have BPD and I have a hx of alcohol abuse, but I think that that's what put me in it, not being honest. But, it hurts not having support when you are at one of your lowest. I mean, I don't know what will happen down the line. I am not talking in terms of being a danger to patients. I am saying that in the future, if I would ever need to go back into a psych facility (if I am not feeling that great or something), I don't want it to be a situation that I lied to the Board, then a physician tell them about it, and then get in more trouble because of lying. I have something that I will deal with for a long time, if not the rest of my life. I may do wonderful and not need any in patient anymore or I may have a mental breakdown and need it. I just wanted to be honest and have the approval with them knowing than to only have it with lying to them.
They were nice enough to grant the approval and I am grateful (to VA...TN, we're working on them), but I hate that my mom throws this "you shouldn't have disclosed. You have yourself to blame" stuff in my face.
I have always found it odd that everyone wants honesty, but not everyone is honest. Everyone wants acceptance, but not everyone is accepting. I want to try and change that. People shouldn't have to lie because of mental health issues.