Telling your head nurse that they...uhh.., sabotaging new staff?

[hazyblue]

What's a better word for suck? :?

So I was wondering if anyone here has/had told their head nurse or charge nurse or supervisor or manager that they are awful? What's your story? Is such a thing all right to be done?

These past few days, I feel like telling my head nurse that she's SO bad at training me but fortunately or unfortunately I can't speak to her. My tongue just gets tied.

I want to tell her to stop expecting me not to make any mistakes because I 99.9% do not know anything about dialysis. I want to tell her to stop scolding me as if she oriented me well to the unit. When I was new to the unit, she made me take vital signs and priming for at least a month and that killed my brain cells. And during those days, when I asked a question of why this and that, she would say later. There was even a time when she scolded my senior for teaching me about sodium profiles, and that just made me lose the desire to ask questions. Seriously, I still don't know all the options of a hemodialysis machine. I want to tell her to stop expecting me to be improved and fast on the job because she just or rather the whole area just lowers my morale and most of the time I lose my will to work and occasionally my will to live.

I am already stressed with patients that I can't please and can never please because of their first impression of me and all of head nurse's being just pushes me off my limit. It is so sad not to have support.

Anyway, there was a time that my tongue slid out a bit and I told her I want to be transferred to another area. She asked me at first "why" but when another mishap on my part occurred (a mishap that even the senior nurses experience) she was more the willing to transfer me. I think there was something else, a misunderstanding perhaps but I hated to tackle things with her. This just made me think less of her abilities of guiding new nurses.

And the sad part was she told me that I will be transferring on the very day that I got myself to view dialysis with love.

As a conclusion (did I even made sense?), before I leave the unit for another one this following month, I want to give her a review of her performance so that she'll improve herself however there is just this wall between us. I was thinking of telling our nursing department director so that she could tell her but it just doesn't seem right..... *sigh* I hate my work place...

[canesdukegirl, BSN, RN]

OP,

I cannot pretend to understand your struggles. I do, however understand that you must walk a fine line when you are working as a foreign nurse. Their understanding is not your understanding. Their customs are not your customs. You must at once be malleable to the culture, but also be responsible for your patients. This is IMPOSSIBLE to do without leadership.

This intricate ballet is difficult to dance.

My wish for you is that you hold your own values and your own confidence as a nurse in high regard. You have already closed one chapter. Leave it closed. Start the next with all of the eagerness and exuberance that you can...stay positive. I cannot express this sentiment more strongly. It is key.

[xtxrn, ASN, RN]

*sigh* "Your responsibility alone", I don't know how your world works for you people but no man is an island.

You can't expect someone to ask questions about something they have no idea about. Are you going to ask how to bake a cake if you don't know what a cake is?

Anyway, I know what you are all trying to say but I can't make things work on my own with nothing. I know that nursing is a field where you can never be too careful and that you should question everything. Unfortunately, I'm not able to see everything because I wasn't even oriented to everything.

My orientation was to sit and watch. I wasn't able to shadow a staff on my start because I was assigned to do this and that. I followed different people as an initiative but that set-up didn't allow me to see everything. They gave me the unit's protocol but what was written there is something they no longer follow. I pointed that out but they said later.

I just wanted to say to my head nurse that teaching someone one lesson per month is not effective when you make them handle patients alone. Actually, I was being sent to the ICU for acute cases by myself (thank goodness I have internet by that time).

I just realized that this thread became focused on her teaching methods...it's not just about that. There's also staffing problems and inconsideration and bias.

The "sigh" is victim behavior....and WHOSE inconsideration and bias?

What did YOU do to contribute to the issue? That's all you can change....nobody else. I hope it all works out for you when you find a department/unit that suits you....sometimes stuff just doesn't work. It doesn't have to be about bias.

JMHO

Hang in there in the new place- and if there are cultural issues, learn what they are, and move on...if you're here, these are the cultural issues here; if you're "there", there are cultural issues there. I'm sure that's difficult. But it is what it is. No employer is bound to accommodate cultural differences if it doesn't fit the overall working environment. And, you aren't obligated to stay where you aren't comfortable (work wise, or whatever). BUT, you can learn a lot from any situation :)

Maybe use the internet to learn more about the cultural issues where you are...can't hurt :)

[Mulan]

The "sigh" is victim behavior....and WHOSE inconsideration and bias?

What did YOU do to contribute to the issue? That's all you can change....nobody else. I hope it all works out for you when you find a department/unit that suits you....sometimes stuff just doesn't work. It doesn't have to be about bias.

JMHO

Hang in there in the new place- and if there are cultural issues, learn what they are, and move on...if you're here, these are the cultural issues here; if you're "there", there are cultural issues there. I'm sure that's difficult. But it is what it is. No employer is bound to accommodate cultural differences if it doesn't fit the overall working environment. And, you aren't obligated to stay where you aren't comfortable (work wise, or whatever). BUT, you can learn a lot from any situation :)

Maybe use the internet to learn more about the cultural issues where you are...can't hurt :)

What makes a "sigh" "victim behavior"?

As far as the inconsideration and bias, I'll take her word for it, after all she is the one who is there.

[xtxrn, ASN, RN]

What makes a "sigh" "victim behavior"?

As far as the inconsideration and bias, I'll take her word for it, after all she is the one who is there.

When it's repetitive. Reactions are choices (I know I've made my share of unhelpful ones ).

OK. We all get to have our own opinions :) The OP (who IS there), and everyone else, who is now reading this, and making opinions based on our own experiences.... doesn't have to be a "bad" thing :) The language issues alone open the door for it to be "nothing" but that- and that has to be very difficult, along with the male oriented culture.