The Patient I Failed - page 20

by nerdtonurse?

She knew what she wanted. She'd watched her husband of 52 years die on a vent, and followed his wishes to remain a full code. But she knew that was not what she wanted for herself. So, she wrote a Living Will, had it... Read More


  1. 0
    I'm crying...so sorry that you had to participate in that ...you seem to be a wonderfully caring nurse!
  2. 1
    Wow. That was very moving.
    Her Will should've overpowerd her daughters wishes regardless of the woman's inability to speak for herself! At least she's now at peace with her husband, in heaven!! :heartbeat
    ERnurseATL likes this.
  3. 0
    i feel for you and also for the daughter.... it's never easy to let go... because at the back of your mind there is always that small voice of hope and the probability of what-if's... you wanted to respect the patient's wishes but to leave things as it was is difficult... watching someone you love die right before your eyes with the knowledge that you can't do anything... is one hard call... :'(
  4. 0
    An amazing story, mahalo for sharing. This is a scenario we face far too often. No matter how often we say "If you love them, let them go on their terms", they don't listen. Even though I dislike the daughter's decision, when it's her time to go, I hope we follow her wishes. I agree, you didn't fail her, you gave the comfort and care she deserved in the given circumstances, but I understand your feeling the way you do.
  5. 0
    That daughter is selfish and if she really loved her mother she would have not put her through that, that poor lady all she wanted to do is die in peace. I surely will pass this on.
  6. 0
    i am only a cna and i have to do the brunt work in my job but i have seen this happen in a nurseing home and i see people live for so long past when they wanted and working in a nurseing home i have seen people go from walking and talking to vegtabules and i know i would never want that for myself i have seen nurses do there job and folow there orders and this article was just amazing and just like my user name at most times all i can say when things like this hapen is i just work here i try my best to make a differince and i hope i do i just also hope that my loved ones know and love me enough to never put me throu anything like that oh gosh i am just tearing up
  7. 0
    So, so sad. :'( And to think of the similar and unheard stories like this one. Breaks your heart.
  8. 0
    Where in the world does it say you can't be a DNR if you're healthy???? Anyone can be a DNR if they wish!!!! Or is this saying that because she was healthy there was no need for one at the time???

    This is so sad....the family physician needs to re think his profession. He is the front line of defence.

    Nursing has a firm committment to do no harm. I am so blessed that I work in an environment that I am not only able but expected to advocate for the patient and their wishes, to a level that includes refusing to follow through with a directive that inflicts harm. Bless you for not continuing the feeds.
  9. 0
    Thanks for sharing what so many of us experience while working. Very well written.
  10. 0
    So sad and tragic. Beutifully written. I'm utterly speechless as to what to say about the daughter.


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