Nurse Mobbing/bullying - page 8

:balloons: I am new to the forum and would like to get feedback from others who have experienced mobbing/bullying/harassment in the healthcare field. Please share so others might learn more about... Read More

  1. by   HarryPotter
    Hi Luci:
    Looks like your going to a better place. And, of course the staff's morale is declining. The environment sounds out of control. When I worked in Washington State years ago, a kid at age 13 was considered "emancipated" and could leave the unit whenever they liked. There was absolutely no leaverage there...I felt like I worked in a shopping mall atmosphere...the kids would just hang out, plot, get into trouble, refuse to participate in groups, etc. It was truly a horrible experience, and a dangerous one as well. I left that job and the very dedicated staff that stayed. As for your worries about declining morale, guess those left behind need to step up to the plate and create a program that works.
    On another note: 45 huh....soooo young. Me, I am 63 and have kids, grandkids, and a great grandchild coming. Time flys. Have fun while you can. Let me know how things are going...I love hearing from you and responding. Harry.
  2. by   Bama_Jypsy1
    I have found that bullying and in general, just plain bad and rude behaviors are blatent in most of the places I've worked. I was straight out of LPN school and went to work at a LTC facility with 2 other nursing buddies. I was given 1.5 wks of orientation, due to the fact that the 11-7 nurse had been a no call no show for the past week and they needed me on that shift pronto. I'd never worked in the medical field, other than what little we'd done in school during clinicals. Just so happened that it was the end of the month and guess who was responsible for all the change overs? You guessed it, ME. I had no clue as to how this was supposed to be done. I was being left "bossy" notes by one of the first shift nurses. I'd come in at night and there would be post it notes and taped notes strung up all over the place. My friend that was working days, kept telling them that it wasn't that I was just NOT doing the work, it was that I either didn't know to do it or didn't know HOW to do it! They'd hired my buddies from nsg school and we had the place sewed up, one of us on each shift. Connie had plenty of help during the day on 7-3 ,5 total nurses, 3-11 had only Brenda and 11-7 only myself. I was kept up to date on all of the gossip about me via my friends. They were backing me 100% and even putting the other nurses in their place and letting them know that it wasn't me that was to blame, it was them for throwing me on nights without any orientation to the shift! None what-so-ever!

    If Connie didn't get around to doing something, Brenda would do it. Brenda didn't have time to complete something, I'd do it. We covered each other completely! Which is the way the system should work. We were each other's eyes, ears and hands. I ended up leaving after only 3 months. The place was causing me to have major stress headaches and kept my nerves in an uproar so much so that I just couldn't take it anymore. The DON was leaving me 3 pg letters at the nurses station and being very critical. threatening and condescending about my job performance, when it was she that put me on that particular shift in the first place, knowing full well that I'd had no orientation at all. I left the job and didn't go back to work as a nurse for 3.5 yrs. When I did finally get up enough nerve to try nursing again, I was very insecure in my job skills and performance thanks to all of the notes I'd recieved at my first job.
    I've been a nurse for 11 yrs now and I've worked at only 3 facilities, all LTC. I've found that it's pretty much the same every where you go, as far as the back biting and bickering about this and that. You can report things until the cows come home and nothing ever changes. The managment doesn't care to write up the nurses that have been there forever, you know, (the ones that cover every shift needing covered.) I can't tell you how many times everyone in the facility has reported this one particular nurse for sleeping on the job. They know she does it and won't do anything about it. She works 20 hrs/day ,7 days a wk. Seriously! She's not giving any type of care. She IS the walking dead. We've had residents to die under her care and she is no where to be found, not even with the intercom (that's not supposed to be used after 10 pm unless it's a code.) Guess what? They've made her house supervisor!!! Now she can sleep all she wants and the nurses on duty have to really struggle if there is a problem on their shift. They have no help at all with her being HS. You simply can't find her when needed, ever! What do you do? You do the best you can and make friends with another nurse you CAN depend on to get you out of a tight when there's trouble. That is about all you can do.
  3. by   mattsmom81
    By Bama: 'The managment doesn't care to write up the nurses that have been there forever, you know, (the ones that cover every shift needing covered.)'


    Sadly I find this is true in much of acute care as well, and I'm even finding it in home health. !The 'established nurse' is allowed to continue her bad behavior no matter how destructive. The managers would rather keep status quo than support the new hires. Sad isn't it.

    Then there are some places where the new hires get the best schedules and even better pay...if the manager can get away with it, while the older nurses are abused and even run off. So much dysfunction out there...its a real challenge to find a nurse who is happy with her management team today. I am always jealous when I read a post here by a nurse who has a good, fair manager!!!
    Last edit by mattsmom81 on Sep 9, '05
  4. by   Bama_Jypsy1
    Then there are some places where the new hires get the best schedules and even better pay...if the manager can get away with it, while the older nurses are abused and even run off.


    It sounds as if this is their answer to cleaning house and replacing all of the ones they no longer want working there.
    When the facility I worked at desperately needed coverage, they'd work out a deal for a particular nurse to cover said shift and in turn, give them either the next day off, or the day of their choice, usually a Saturday. These were 12 hr shifts and illegal to work! They'd let nurses work OVER 24 hrs at a time. SO NOT good!
  5. by   Jdon
    Quote from Angela Mac
    Also-----I have left employment with certain companies because of unethical workplace politics. If you are not happy with your job, get another one, it beats suffering burn-out & giving up on nursing. Good Luck.

    I understand completly about leaving employment d/t unethical conduct, however has that ever caused you difficullty in finding another job( having job hopped- so to speak) ?
  6. by   Jessy_RN
    Wishing you best of luck and the info you need.
  7. by   PerrieLPN2
    I have found that there are a lot of bullies in nursing and most of them are other nurses. I have been bullied in several ways from the people I believe should be the most nurturing. There is a nurses that I work with,she is the charge nurse on the weekend who comes in late just about every weekend and disrupts report by explaining loudly about the reason she is late or what she done over the week, she don't stay for report she just comes in like a world wind and distracts everyone else. No one else will say anything just say "that's just how she is"! I talk over her but most of the time she just talk louder which get on all our nerves, and it takes us longer for report.
    There was another instance where a nurse, the charge nurse from the am shift, physically got in between me and my pm charge nurse while I was talking to the nurse about a pateint, as if I did not have the ablity to correctly explain what I just observed because I am a LPN.
    I have seen nurses who like "brownie points" bully others when Dr.'s and managers are around.This nurse wants to be in management, so she steps on others to make herself look good.
    I just think you should treat ALL nurses (and everyone else) with the respect that you want to be treated with. I am a firm believer in the "Golden Rule". We do have the problem where "nurses eat their young,"(and we wonder why we have a nurse shortage). When Nurses bully others around you make them feel inadequate which show in their work and attitudes. I think that everyday, you should uplift your coworkers, these are your team members and your team is as good as your weakest player!
    Anyone have any "nice" ways to handle these situations? What are some ways you help new nurses or/and nursing students to feel welcome?
    Last edit by PerrieLPN2 on Oct 2, '05
  8. by   music
    Quote from PerrieLPN2
    ......I just think you should treat ALL nurses (and everyone else) with the respect that you want to be treated with. I am a firm believer in the "Golden Rule". We do have the problem where "nurses eat their young,"(and we wonder why we have a nurse shortage). When Nurses bully others around you make them feel inadequate which show in their work and attitudes. I think that everyday, you should uplift your coworkers, these are your team members and your team is as good as your weakest player!
    Anyone have any "nice" ways to handle these situations? What are some ways you help new nurses or/and nursing students to feel welcome?

    As an RN for many years, I have observed that nurses, in general, have a tendency to "follow the leader" and the "leaders" aren't always setting the right example. We take better care of our patients than each other. Make a committment to yourself and your team to be a "positive leader." We are all potential leaders and we can do that in many ways that will build a more positive environment and team.

    First of all, don't lower yourself to the level of others who are being rude, inappropriate and unprofessional. Rise above it and quietly say "it's not OK to talk to me like that. I'm a professional nurse and I expect to be treated as one." .......or if someone is complaining or talking negatively about a co-worker, rather than join in this behavior say "What can we do to help them become better at this?"

    I have used both of these options on different occassions and those who were treating me and others negatively were so shocked by my approach, they had no comeback. Those who observed my approach became empowered to do the same. It is a slow and steady process.........and it works. I believe in myself and the power of my own voice and you will too when you see how well this works. I use it wisely and at the proper times and others have learned from my example. All I did was choose to be professional........It covers a wide variety of circumstances. When you act in a professional manner and approach situations in this manner, you can't go wrong.

    If you have a very negative situation, document it professionally and acurately and send a copy to your manager. Documenting negative behavior in the right way can have very positive outcomes. First of all, if your manager sees it in writing and it is documented very factually, he/she has an obligation to address it. I will give you an example: Years ago, we had a nurse in our department who took great delight in cutting down new nurses, giving them negative feedback in front of others and various other things. I was the object of this behavior for some time until I finally decided to do something as described above. I first tried telling this person it was not OK to do this anymore and that if it continued, I was going to write it up. It continued and I documented it and stated that if this behavior was not stopped, I would take it higher as it was abusive and bordered on harassment. GUESS what happened............Yes. This nurse was told in very clear terms that the behavior had to stop and why.........The behavior stopped immediately..........Others noticed and I became a role model and mentor for others............Just by standing up for myself. Professionally. For the right reasons. Not by putting the other person down in public. Just by using my own voice.

    The key is to turn negative peer pressure into positive peer pressure. Raise the bar and let it be known that you don't condone negative behavior. As others see your positive attitude, more will gain confidence in standing up to bullies and they soon will be outnumbered.

    I hope this is helpful. We all need to step up to the plate and reclaim our profession. Be proud of who you are. Don't accept negative behavior. And please don't join in the negative behavior of others who are not supportive of new nurses. We need them and the only way they are going to stay is if they feel welcome.

  9. by   bloviate
    Quote from music
    The key is to turn negative peer pressure into positive peer pressure. Raise the bar and let it be known that you don't condone negative behavior. As others see your positive attitude, more will gain confidence in standing up to bullies and they soon will be outnumbered.

    I hope this is helpful. We all need to step up to the plate and reclaim our profession. Be proud of who you are. Don't accept negative behavior. And please don't join in the negative behavior of others who are not supportive of new nurses. We need them and the only way they are going to stay is if they feel welcome.
    This might work for me if there wasn't an overall misandrist attitude among nurses.

    As for me, the only way i'm going to stay is if I don't get into grad school. Can't wait to leave nursing forever. :hatparty: It's a good job with a lot of abusive lousy people in it. It's a pity things are like that.
  10. by   JessicRN
    I was recently a victim of Nurse Mobbing and bullying. My situation pretty much started on day one when I rubbed the secretary the wrong way (how I did that is anyones guess) As a result I remained on extended probation for 8 months even though there was no incidents against me no documentation that I did anything wrong in fact I aced all tests and was considered the "smartest person they ever met". Although this bullying was identified by both the nurse manager and the charge nurse they did nothing nor did my union. I was finally sent to the night shift where the bullying stopped for a 7 months then started up when I asked to be replacement charge nurse just like everyone else on the floor including a RN who just signed on after being a traveler for 15 months. Again it was known by the nurse manager and supervisor and director of Nursing but no one did anything. In fact the charge nurse openly told these people that I was blackballed because I went outside the family went to the union and made a petition. (I did nothing of the sort except to go to the union and ask what was required to be replacement charge). I was finally screamed at by a male nurse who is 6'3 350 lbs and when I told him to stop yelling he yelled "bite me" in the midle of the hall in a busy ER for all to hear.
    I was terrified to go back to work because of this and the other incidents and went to HR he admitted he did this and said "it is the only way she will listen"
    As a result I took another job in the same company but a different hospital.
    The bottom line is nothing happened to any of the staff they are still there without so much as a reprimand. I almost had a nervous breakdown and they just smile and walk away:angryfire
  11. by   EDGRADNURSE
    I'm sorry that this happened to you.

    I just left my first RN job out of school because of a clique of bullies. I went to the manager w/a complaint--it was unbearable. He had a "Talk" with all of us--this won't be tolerated, blah blah. Two days later, I'm in his office and he's addressing the complaints that the bullies have about me (too sensitive, they have to "walk on eggshells"). No. I can take a joke if it is not mean-spirited. Things like looking up derogatory terms for a certain nationality on the internet and deciding to share them with me is crossing the line. Mind you, I had asked these people to stop in a polite way and in a not so polite way.

    Because I complained to management I was ostracized. So, these people have their jobs and I had to leave for my own sanity and it "appears" that I HAD THE PROBLEM.

    In the end, I'm convinced the bullies always win and it's just better to leave. Going to management only seems to make things worse.

    Again, sorry this happened to you.
  12. by   bargainhound
    I just had a similar experience. I felt like I had been slapped in the face
    and really was down because I don't seem to be able to stand up for myself
    in an appropriate/timely manner........just seem to let people stomp me....they
    keep their job and I am literally pushed away.

    I just read a book that has helped give some insight into other people's behavior
    and what we can do to protect ourselves.

    The Sociopath Next Door by Marth Stout, Ph.d.

    I know that not everyone is a sociopath, but it does help explain why some
    people behave the way they do. 1 out of 25 is a sociopath....no conscience....
    can do anything and have no feelings about effects on other people.
    Last edit by bargainhound on Mar 18, '06 : Reason: correction of number
  13. by   grannynurse FNP student
    Not only do nurses bully in the workplace but I have found they do on message boards as well. I have had the experience of being mobbed, not on this board, but another one. I try to ignore the worse of the offenders but I am not always successful:spin:

    Grannynurse

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