we are officially open for business, the upgrade took a little longer than planned, we pulled an all-nighter
i will be making a brief video and will take some screenshots etc... of the different areas to check out. meanwhile, please tell us what you think? thanks
wOW! You guys really hit home with this one! I am pursuing a nursing career also.... looking at some of the other negative posts on the site, I had almost forgot why I wanted to be one! You guys brought me back...All of positive things that you guys mentioned is what I felt in my heart all the time its just that when you hear too much negativity about nursing it was starting to make me wonder and question the field. But I feel that God is calling me to take care of the sick and I have alway loved serving people.:heartbeat and Help Restoring them if I can.
I agree with you dsigney! There is a lot of negativity on the nursing forums...and I have an opinion as to why. There are a trememdous amount of things in nursing that the nurse gets no choice about. For example:
**no choice (or very, very little choice) in which patients the nurse gets that day (daily "assignment")
**no choice in the timing of patients (it seems as soon as one discharges they're on the phone calling report on the next one)
**even though the acuity of patients can change at any time, there's no adjustment made in the number of patients the nurse has to take (in other words ratios rule, not acuity)
**administration doesn't care about what the nurses have to say
**requests of administration for change fall on deaf ears
These are just a few areas that the nurse has "no choice" in. There are tons more. When "choice" is taken away from you, you are likely to feel like a victim. You may become negative, anxiety ridden and depressed. Talk about stress!
I am an advocate for nurses. I care about my fellow nurses. I think we have a tremendous power source that we haven't tapped into. Personally, I've tapped into this power source in my own nursing career. The results are amazing.
Asking for what you want is very empowering. I blog about this. It's listed under my profile.
I work on a very busy L & d floor that had a long history of making life very hard on new nurses. It was brutal and many wonderful nurses were lost to blatant bullying. Finally an ingenious nurse created a Mentor program which has proved to be fabulously successful in shifting our culture to one of nurturing our new nurses instead of isolating/picking on new nurses. Each new nurse is assigned an experienced nurse as her "Mentor" once out of orientation. That nurse checks in regularly with the new nurse and acts as a "sounding board" if there are difficulties. The mentor can also act as mediator if there are issues with another nurse. After 6 months working on her own with the support of the Mentor, the new nurse has a "shower" thrown for her where she is bestowed with words of support and encouragement, "cut" from the support of her Mentor (long red licorice cords--what can I say, we're OB nurses) It brings everyone together in a culture consciously choosing to be gentle and supportive with our newbies. It has made a world of difference to retention. Makes us old nurses feel pretty good, too!
This is an INSPIRED, "thinking out of the box", beautiful way to build teamwork. I applaud you and your co-workers. Sometimes we have to be ingenious nurses to bring love into the picture.
Everyday I seek to be inspired and assisted by an infinite source of love rather than strictly relying on my finite self.
If I leave it up to me, I limit myself and my possibilities every time.
I am very familiar with new age thought. I practiced it through the late 80's and 90's and finally came to realize that I was missing a piece. Unfortunately it was too easy to deny reality. Once I started accepting reality of the way things were, then I was able to have a firm basis to build on. It isn't as pretty or pleasant that way sometimes. I certainly don't reject all of this practice. Affirmations are important. I generally refer to them as positive self talk. It is also important to be aware and cognicent of the good in others and in situations. I wish the total new age concept worked but I have been there and done that and it doesn't work as well as grounding my actions in the reality of what is. Prayer, sending out energy to the universe does work, but sometimes the answer is "grow some gazungas and confront the person whose behavior is making it rough for you!" Even Christ got angry with cause. I wish I never had to do that, but am glad that I can today. Accepting my humaness and my dark side has been part of my journey.
Mahage
rock on...I know we all know about the law of attraction...I know I'm not teaching you anything you don't already know...
it's just that there's a difference between "knowing" about a tool and really, really picking it up and using it.
and furthermore, you don't have to believe that it will even work for it to WORK...it's a law. Ask and it is given. If you want to ask to grow some gazungas and confront someone's behavior that is making it rough for you then ask,
example:
I am assertive.
I stand up for myself.
I speak up for myself.
I conduct myself in an appropriate manner during confrontation.
I have a voice during an argument.
I speak clearly and confidently.
I am heard by my co-worker.
I ask for what I want.
I recognize when I am angry.
I speak up for myself in a professional manner when I am angry.
All those in my life are for my highest good, all others fade away.
I am respected.
put it down in writing...ask.
don't limit this tool.
there are three possible answers you can get...but I won't go into that right now (see my blog listed in my profile)...but suffice it to say that you must trust your spiritual source (God for me) to provide in whatever way he sees fit for what you need and want...my job is to just keep asking
remember seek and yee shall find? it's my job to seek (ask)!
I much prefer the feeling of working for him (have him be my employer) and relying on him to meet my needs at work than that helpless feeling of relying on the humans that run my hospital...he's infinite, they're finite. It relieves my stress. It's effective. It works.
When you're out of supplies at work, don't you ask your employer to provide you with more? Well this is the same thing. Ask for what you want. This is a highly empowering tool Mahage!
Actually quiet well. I am a realist. I know well the power of positive self talk, however you have to start based on what is, not on what you wish. Yes, change is an inside job. You have to change the way you react to the negative or the stressors you encounter, unfortunately denying them won't get you anywhere. Sometimes it involves confrontation of others behavior, sometimes venting, sometimes re-evaluting your actions and planning for change. All of this is about inside changes as your thoughts and strategies change and evolve as you go on. Mahage
No. You don't have to start with what is! And you absolutely have to get in touch with what you wish!!!!!!!!!!! That's the whole point.
I'm sick of being a realist. I'm sick of the feeling that this job is humanly impossible and it's never gonna change. I'm sick of feeling like a victim in nursing.
This forum and other forums are filled with nurses pouring their hearts out about the frustrations of nursing. I see it all the time. Nurses asking what to do about their insomnia. Nurses asking about what to do with their anxieties. Nurses writing about their frustrations with co-workers, patients, families, management. Nurses talking about how there's never enough help when they need it. The amount of energy being put into the PROBLEM is incredible. The reality of nursing is grueling.
I'm asking you to dream. In your wildest dreams, what would your nursing experience feel like? (FORGET reality for a minute)
Because, after all, how is being a realist working for ya? Why not put it out there to "the universe" or whatever faith you practice that you need some HELP. Put it in writing. I dare you! And by the way, you are going to need a strong spiritual belief system to survive in nursing.
I'm simply suggesting that you USE your faith. Ask for what you want.
examples:
I have all the help I need to take good care of my patients.
I have all the skills I need to take care of my patients.
I have a manageable pace to my work day.
I take regular breaks and practice good self care at work.
I leave work on time regularly.
I have all the resource personnel that I need at my fingertips to help take care of my patients.
There is more than ENOUGH for me in the world.
I chart quickly and efficiently.
I am safe and protected at work.
I am happy at work.
I build teamwork at work.
I am well respected at work.
Yes. It's an inside job. Ask yourself what you WANT. What do your wildest "Nursing dreams" look like...then write them down in a 79-cent note book. (there's a few other steps to the system, but this is the most important one!)
Pen to paper is extremely powerful.
Yes, there will be confrontations, venting sessions, reevaluating your strategies. And each time those scenarios come up, ask "the universe" for even MORE help in writing.
examples:
I am confident when dealing with ______.
I am compassionate when dealing with_____.
I forgive ______.
I am calm when dealing with ______.
I speak up for myself with ______.
I assert myself with _____.
I know with crystal clarity how to proceed with _____.
The situation with _____ is resolved with good for ALL concerned.
The exact point is to NOT look at past history to determine your future. Just because something has always been a certain way, doesn't mean it's always got to stay that way. This IS about dreaming. This is about creating the reality you want.
And by all means DON'T look to the past to determine your future. Yuck! Instead, each and every time you have a fear, worry or "situation with someone" come up that you need help with...Ask!
we do "group" training sessions that "all staff" attend, this seems to cut down on the "eating of anyone", because we will repremand you if you "eat your young" at our facility.. We expect respect to all staff , young & old, and to be honest! I would rather hire a NEW grad than an Old Hat! Reason being, a new grad is opening to learning, Us old HAT's are stuck in our ways & are hard to train!!
But thats just 1 nurses opinion! But i love the take the cranky nurse out for coffee, and compliments, that would really work for me! haha i might have to suggest that!!
Thanks again for your positive spin on Nursing! :heartbeat
And I applaud you for thinking out of the box and creating a nurturing environment (safe for questions) on your floor.
Believe me, I'm choosing to think out of the box to deal with nursing stress issues because the other boxes that I kept thinking in seemed to have trap doors and I kept falling through them.
In other words, focusing on the problem and staying STUCK there didn't get me anywhere (except fights with my beloved husband)! Now when I encounter a problem at work, I write specific parameters on it and use it to work for me rather than take me down!
I'd love to see all nurses start asking for what they want in their lives...I'm positive that our patients would benefit! I :typing about it, listed under my profile.
I think you idea about the parameters is a good one, however as a new nurse you are lucky to get to go potty! At 56, I have to, or I would have an extra "clean-up Job." I can't afford anymore cleanups than neccessary, LOL!
Mahage
You're proving my point! How is what YOU are doing working for you?
I know what it feels like to feel like a lamb voluntarily walking into the slaughter house every day...I feel your pain. But if you keep focusing on what you don't want in your life (how you never get breaks and how certain charge nurses are out to get you, etc.) then that's what you'll keep getting. Believe me, I speak from experience.
If you keep affirming over and over in your mind that as a new nurse (even at age 56) that you have so much work to do that you can't even take a break to go potty, then THAT'S what you'll keep getting. Because that's where your focus is.
All I'm saying is that it DOESN'T have to be that way. I :typing about this all the time on my blog (listed in my profile). Change is an inside job. You don't have to wait for "the system" to change to fix your frustrations. Besides, you might be waiting a very long time!
Use your nursing frustrations to help you write parameters specific to you and the nursing life that you want to lead. That's what I do and it works! It's helpinig me get less of this and more of this !
Hi everyone....I am doing a powerpoint on Nursing Stress today and would love to open this website in class. I would like to take an informal poll on what you think causes the most stress in your work environment and what nursing specialties you think generate the most stress. Thanks....
These post are several years old. Thankfully the staffing ratios have changed in California. It's now 5 (maximum) patients to 1 nurse. This is a beautiful thing. However, depending on acuity, things can feel really hairy, really fast at any given moment of any given day.
That's why I practice the Law of Attraction in my nursing career. As you can see in these posts, nurses are really good at complaining. There is a huge aspect to nursing that leaves the nurses and the caregivers of these really sick patients feeling very overwhelmed and helpless. Nurses (and other HCW'S) feel like victims much of the time. Their loyalty to their patients takes over and, in the end, they don't take care of themselves.
The focus becomes very, very negative and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. A negative feedback loop, if you will.
I have found relief through incorporating the principles of the Law of Attraction into my nursing practice. I ASK the universe for what I want help with and I get it! I focus on gratitude and what's going right during my day. It makes all the difference in the world.
I write about solutions to nursing stress on my personal blog. I share the system that I have had great success with. Take a peek. Believe me, it's better than the alternative! My blog is listed via my public profile.
Does anyone have any good ideas on stress relief during nursing school.I am a junior taking Adult Health I, I think I will pull all of my hair out before it's over. Also looking for any new ideas for studying tips. I am just taking way to long to get through any subject.
Thanks
Here's what I do with my stresses whether they be from my work life or my home life or just things that may become a worry for me.
I write about them free-hand, just kind of "hash things out" and get in touch with the sources of my stress. From there I get a clear picture in my mind of what I specifically want help on. And then I ask for the help! Using a 79-cent notebook, I list my desires in affirmative, present tense sentences. I am asking God for help in attracting what I want. But you can think of it as asking your Creator, Jesus Christ, Allah, Buddha, God, the universe, your Higher Power or ANY belief system that you practice.
Some of the parameters I would write about if I were you would be: I am focused during class. I am in tune with the subject matter. I easily comprehend the subject matter. I score well on my tests. I have all the help and resources I need. I score "B's" or better on my tests. I have the proper study partners for me. I quickly get through each subject. I retain what I study. I make good progress with each passing week. I remain calm. I have a positive attitude about nursing school. ETC., ETC., ETC.
Short, direct, simple sentences. Skip lines between sentences.
Ask for what you want...pen to paper is powerful...I blog specifically about tools nurses can use to counter nursing stress. There's a little more to it, but the MOST important part is listing what you want in writing. There is more information at my blog, listed in my profile.
Good luck to you! Keep up the good work and keep asking for what you want in life!
I just had a Christmas potluck/ornament exchange party at my house last night for my co-workers. It was a wonderful experience. It was my second (annual) Christmas potluck. Attendance doubled from last year. It was actually surreal to be surrounded by all the wonderful hard working ladies that I work with. There they were in my own home. We were all dressed in beautiful (non-scrubs) clothing. We were HUMANS!
The Director of our floor sat right next to me and one of the main charge nurses sat two people over on my left. It was a warm and happy atmosphere. Lots of laughs. Great food. Nice music. Cute ornaments.
And I helped create it because I was willing to reach out. I was willing to do something different. I was willing to ask for it to happen in my life.
I don't believe in being a door mat in my life. But I am also careful to not focus on the negative either. What I do focus on is what I want (NOT WHAT I DON'T WANT).
Some of the parameters I've written for my job are: I am respected at work. I practice good self care at work. I take regular breaks. I have all the help I need to care for my patients. I am safe at work. I am effecient at work. I help to create a great sense of teamwork on my floor. I love my co-workers. I have managable assignments. The pace of my workday is easily managable for me. I advocate for my patients. I make a difference in my patient's (& their families) lives.
And yes, I made a list specifically for my Christmas party. Focused on what I wanted.
Ask for what you want. not what you don't want. I blog about it.
Yes, I find the behavior offensive, not the phrase. Those few bad experiences can be devastating. As a very new nurse, I felt that I could easily make a small mistake and really hurt someone, or miss some observation and let a condition go untreated and lead to death. This pressure combined with the "make her or break her" acuity level of my assignments gave me the feeling of drowning.
Boy do I remember that feeling of drowning when I was new. I bet if we took a pole on that subject we'd get a response of 100% near drownings in their first year of nursing from all of us.
A little story if I may...I have the cutest ceramic pin that I wear just above my name tag. It's a smiling head of a nurse. My older patient's really seem to notice it and like it. Sometimes the older lady patients will actually reach out to it and touch it.
Anyway, when I first started on my floor, I was paired with a nurse who had such a scary personality, I could hardly believe that she was a nurse let alone a preceptor. She was short with me, gave me rude looks, talked about me in the break room to other nurses, and was frequently gone on smoke breaks which she called breathing treatments. Yuck!
Well, half way into my orientation, she was really acting vile. And one morning I caught her in an ante-room having the nurse assistant take her blood pressure. It was sky high and she wasn't happy about it.
Come to find out, there was more going on with her than I knew. She was a divorcee. Her husband left her for another woman. She never did get along very well with her step kids so they weren't loyal to her. She never did have any kids of her own. She had a difficult personality to say the least and as a result had pushed everyone away in her life. She was late 50's. She had a dog but he was getting really old. She worried about him.
The high blood pressure? Well, she was in pain and not sleeping well. During my internship she got the diagnosis of Rheumatoid Arthritis. Not good.
Well, when I was finally on my own I found that I still had my check off lists to complete. I asked her if I could come to her house one day and have her sign me off. She agreed.
When I got to her house, she was a different lady all together. She was kind, cooperative, helpful and thorough. She imparted more wisdom in that afternoon than I got out of her in the whole previous 6 weeks. For my part, I showed an interest in her. I got to know her wonderful dog. I looked at collections in her home. She loved polar bears. I got to know her. And what I found out was how lonely she was. Yes, she had created her own lonliness but what a shame.
The next day we worked together there was a gift waiting for me at my locker. It was the nurse pin that I wear on my name tag. She gave it to me with a note that said she felt I was already on my way to being a great nurse.
There was never another cross word between us. From then on, she helped me out. In fact, she actually looked out for me. I spiked bags for her (her arthritis was acting up) and she started IV's for me. She ended up transfering to a floor with 8-hr shifts not too long after that. But boy did I learn a lot.
I learned that there are ALWAYS 2 sides to every story and that EVERY story is individual. Today I am a preceptor and I love it. I love working with student nurses and I often tell the story of my preceptor.
But perhaps being a preceptor is just enough to throw certain nurses over the edge. But because they get a couple extra cents in their paychecks they don't say no. Yes there are some who probably shouldn't be doing it but I know there are others who can't get enough of it.
So the next time that nasty preceptor you've been assigned to gives you a hard time, remember she has a personal life. Her life could be in shambles. She could actually be lonely and frustrated in her daily life. She may have medical problems. If you possibly can, go for coffee off campus some time to "thank her" for her efforts and see if that doesn't help things.
I enjoy blogging on nurse/stress related topics. I enjoy advocating for my patients. And I especially enjoy advocating for my fellow nurses! We really can create the life of our dreams (even the NURSING LIFE OF OUR DREAMS) if we're willing to ask for it.
I don't think there's a nurse alive that can't relate to what you are saying about sleeplessness and anxiety before a shift. Here's some of the things that I do.
First, I acknowledge that anxiety is the state of "living in the future" about something. For me, it usually involves a feeling that somehow my needs won't be met (in that future scenario) or that there's just not "enough" for me in the world. (not enough support, help, resources, breaks, wisdom, back up, etc., etc.)
My solution?
1) Write about it. Write a letter to "the universe" and hash it out.
2) Talk about it with a professional (and I DON'T mean an M.D. Perhaps a counselor of some type. Release some pressure. Don't do it alone!
3) Have some spiritually nourishing (or just plain entertaining) reading materials right at your bedside and start reading if you can't sleep.
4) Affirm what you need in your life with pen and paper. An example of how I do this is: "I have all the help I need at work. I build teamwork at work. I serve my patients well at work. I practice good self care at work. I take regular breaks. I am efficient at work. I leave work on time regularly."
I don't know about you but these are SOME of the things that I can potentially worry about enough to lose sleep over.
So basically, I take all my worries and I ask "the universe" to specifically help me with those things.
Believe it or not, it helps tremendously and is somewhat empowering!
Good luck! I blog a lot about stress relief for nurses. Stop on by. My blog is listed in my profile.
Thank you for your courage to express yourself so honestly. You talked about the horrific things you saw as a PICU nurse. You talked about how you let yourself slip into addiction to cope with it all.
But you've changed that now. You've made a decision to get into recovery. They say that the first step in recovery (from ANY addiction) is to be able to admit that your way of coping doesn't work anymore.
I recently started a blog about how I cope with the stress of nursing. You see, I'm NOT willing to sacrifice my soul for nursing. I LOVE my patients...don't get me wrong. For 12 hours at a time, I am devoted to them like nobody's business. But I'm no longer willing to "keep it all in" and to come home and go into MUTE mode.
I'm not willing to risk addiction, alcoholism, over shopping, overeating, depression, isolation or self-abuse over this career. It's like saying, "Something isn't right here...I'll show you, I'll drink this poison!" Who gets hurt? We do.
Not worth it to be silent any more!
Good for you. Keep doing your steps of recovery. Work with someone who has gone before you. You're doing great!
Wow, I've never heard of 2000mL straight away from an NG. The poor pt! Are you guys allowed to insert one without a doctors order? Or can you place one based on your judgment. Unfortunately we have to have an order. We try three times, and if unsuccessful, call the resident medical officer. Generally speaking, nurses are better at it. Doctors seem to love putting down hosepipes...
Yes. We absolutely need an order to place an NG tube...and in this case there was an order on the chart for 2 days but it HAD A LOOPHOLE...it said, "Place NG tube if patient continues to have nausea and vomiting"...unfortunately the nurses kept medicating her with just enough anti-nausea meds to keep very large emesis at bay so she was just having small throw ups here and there (and those don't count I guess?).
When things like this happen, I remind myself that I have choices in my life. I can make whatever I want happen in my life if I'm willing to do the daily baby steps required...it's my sincerest wish to inspire other nurses to create their ideal lives too!:typing
There are a few residents on our floor that does not visit some of the patients, but rather asks the nurse about the patient and writes their progress notes and orders based on that.
To their credit, in general, the doctors at our hospital ALWAYS actually lay eyes on their patients (even if it's just from the doorway???). It's pretty rare that they will not look in on the patient before writing their progress note.
And also to their credit, they seek out the nurse (we carry RN cell phones at all times) to ask how the patient has been doing that day. I LOVE when the doctors do that. That way I get to clarify their chicken scratch orders too before they leave.
That's just wrong to think that doctors aren't even looking at their patients at all...that's just wrong
this will take some time getting used to. i appreciate your spirit of growth and expansion though! good for you.
:chuckle
**no choice (or very, very little choice) in which patients the nurse gets that day (daily "assignment")
**no choice in the timing of patients (it seems as soon as one discharges they're on the phone calling report on the next one)
**even though the acuity of patients can change at any time, there's no adjustment made in the number of patients the nurse has to take (in other words ratios rule, not acuity)
**administration doesn't care about what the nurses have to say
**requests of administration for change fall on deaf ears
These are just a few areas that the nurse has "no choice" in. There are tons more. When "choice" is taken away from you, you are likely to feel like a victim. You may become negative, anxiety ridden and depressed. Talk about stress!
I am an advocate for nurses. I care about my fellow nurses. I think we have a tremendous power source that we haven't tapped into. Personally, I've tapped into this power source in my own nursing career. The results are amazing.
Asking for what you want is very empowering. I blog about this. It's listed under my profile.
God bless!
Everyday I seek to be inspired and assisted by an infinite source of love rather than strictly relying on my finite self.
If I leave it up to me, I limit myself and my possibilities every time.
God bless!
it's just that there's a difference between "knowing" about a tool and really, really picking it up and using it.
and furthermore, you don't have to believe that it will even work for it to WORK...it's a law. Ask and it is given. If you want to ask to grow some gazungas and confront someone's behavior that is making it rough for you then ask,
example:
I am assertive.
I stand up for myself.
I speak up for myself.
I conduct myself in an appropriate manner during confrontation.
I have a voice during an argument.
I speak clearly and confidently.
I am heard by my co-worker.
I ask for what I want.
I recognize when I am angry.
I speak up for myself in a professional manner when I am angry.
All those in my life are for my highest good, all others fade away.
I am respected.
put it down in writing...ask.
don't limit this tool.
there are three possible answers you can get...but I won't go into that right now (see my blog listed in my profile)...but suffice it to say that you must trust your spiritual source (God for me) to provide in whatever way he sees fit for what you need and want...my job is to just keep asking
remember seek and yee shall find? it's my job to seek (ask)!
I much prefer the feeling of working for him (have him be my employer) and relying on him to meet my needs at work than that helpless feeling of relying on the humans that run my hospital...he's infinite, they're finite. It relieves my stress. It's effective. It works.
When you're out of supplies at work, don't you ask your employer to provide you with more? Well this is the same thing. Ask for what you want. This is a highly empowering tool Mahage!
Peace!
I'm sick of being a realist. I'm sick of the feeling that this job is humanly impossible and it's never gonna change. I'm sick of feeling like a victim in nursing.
This forum and other forums are filled with nurses pouring their hearts out about the frustrations of nursing. I see it all the time. Nurses asking what to do about their insomnia. Nurses asking about what to do with their anxieties. Nurses writing about their frustrations with co-workers, patients, families, management. Nurses talking about how there's never enough help when they need it. The amount of energy being put into the PROBLEM is incredible. The reality of nursing is grueling.
I'm asking you to dream. In your wildest dreams, what would your nursing experience feel like? (FORGET reality for a minute)
Because, after all, how is being a realist working for ya? Why not put it out there to "the universe" or whatever faith you practice that you need some HELP. Put it in writing. I dare you! And by the way, you are going to need a strong spiritual belief system to survive in nursing.
I'm simply suggesting that you USE your faith. Ask for what you want.
examples:
I have all the help I need to take good care of my patients.
I have all the skills I need to take care of my patients.
I have a manageable pace to my work day.
I take regular breaks and practice good self care at work.
I leave work on time regularly.
I have all the resource personnel that I need at my fingertips to help take care of my patients.
There is more than ENOUGH for me in the world.
I chart quickly and efficiently.
I am safe and protected at work.
I am happy at work.
I build teamwork at work.
I am well respected at work.
Yes. It's an inside job. Ask yourself what you WANT. What do your wildest "Nursing dreams" look like...then write them down in a 79-cent note book. (there's a few other steps to the system, but this is the most important one!)
Pen to paper is extremely powerful.
Yes, there will be confrontations, venting sessions, reevaluating your strategies. And each time those scenarios come up, ask "the universe" for even MORE help in writing.
examples:
I am confident when dealing with ______.
I am compassionate when dealing with_____.
I forgive ______.
I am calm when dealing with ______.
I speak up for myself with ______.
I assert myself with _____.
I know with crystal clarity how to proceed with _____.
The situation with _____ is resolved with good for ALL concerned.
The exact point is to NOT look at past history to determine your future. Just because something has always been a certain way, doesn't mean it's always got to stay that way. This IS about dreaming. This is about creating the reality you want.
And by all means DON'T look to the past to determine your future. Yuck! Instead, each and every time you have a fear, worry or "situation with someone" come up that you need help with...Ask!
Believe me, I'm choosing to think out of the box to deal with nursing stress issues because the other boxes that I kept thinking in seemed to have trap doors and I kept falling through them.
In other words, focusing on the problem and staying STUCK there didn't get me anywhere (except fights with my beloved husband)! Now when I encounter a problem at work, I write specific parameters on it and use it to work for me rather than take me down!
I'd love to see all nurses start asking for what they want in their lives...I'm positive that our patients would benefit! I :typing about it, listed under my profile.
God bless :heartbeat
I know what it feels like to feel like a lamb voluntarily walking into the slaughter house every day...I feel your pain. But if you keep focusing on what you don't want in your life (how you never get breaks and how certain charge nurses are out to get you, etc.) then that's what you'll keep getting. Believe me, I speak from experience.
If you keep affirming over and over in your mind that as a new nurse (even at age 56) that you have so much work to do that you can't even take a break to go potty, then THAT'S what you'll keep getting. Because that's where your focus is.
All I'm saying is that it DOESN'T have to be that way. I :typing about this all the time on my blog (listed in my profile). Change is an inside job. You don't have to wait for "the system" to change to fix your frustrations. Besides, you might be waiting a very long time!
Use your nursing frustrations to help you write parameters specific to you and the nursing life that you want to lead. That's what I do and it works! It's helpinig me get less of this
God bless!
That's why I practice the Law of Attraction in my nursing career. As you can see in these posts, nurses are really good at complaining. There is a huge aspect to nursing that leaves the nurses and the caregivers of these really sick patients feeling very overwhelmed and helpless. Nurses (and other HCW'S) feel like victims much of the time. Their loyalty to their patients takes over and, in the end, they don't take care of themselves.
The focus becomes very, very negative and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. A negative feedback loop, if you will.
I have found relief through incorporating the principles of the Law of Attraction into my nursing practice. I ASK the universe for what I want help with and I get it! I focus on gratitude and what's going right during my day. It makes all the difference in the world.
I write about solutions to nursing stress on my personal blog. I share the system that I have had great success with. Take a peek. Believe me, it's better than the alternative! My blog is listed via my public profile.
God bless my fellow nurses!
I write about them free-hand, just kind of "hash things out" and get in touch with the sources of my stress. From there I get a clear picture in my mind of what I specifically want help on. And then I ask for the help! Using a 79-cent notebook, I list my desires in affirmative, present tense sentences. I am asking God for help in attracting what I want. But you can think of it as asking your Creator, Jesus Christ, Allah, Buddha, God, the universe, your Higher Power or ANY belief system that you practice.
Some of the parameters I would write about if I were you would be: I am focused during class. I am in tune with the subject matter. I easily comprehend the subject matter. I score well on my tests. I have all the help and resources I need. I score "B's" or better on my tests. I have the proper study partners for me. I quickly get through each subject. I retain what I study. I make good progress with each passing week. I remain calm. I have a positive attitude about nursing school. ETC., ETC., ETC.
Short, direct, simple sentences. Skip lines between sentences.
Ask for what you want...pen to paper is powerful...I blog specifically about tools nurses can use to counter nursing stress. There's a little more to it, but the MOST important part is listing what you want in writing. There is more information at my blog, listed in my profile.
Good luck to you! Keep up the good work and keep asking for what you want in life!
I just had a Christmas potluck/ornament exchange party at my house last night for my co-workers. It was a wonderful experience. It was my second (annual) Christmas potluck. Attendance doubled from last year. It was actually surreal to be surrounded by all the wonderful hard working ladies that I work with. There they were in my own home. We were all dressed in beautiful (non-scrubs) clothing. We were HUMANS!
The Director of our floor sat right next to me and one of the main charge nurses sat two people over on my left. It was a warm and happy atmosphere. Lots of laughs. Great food. Nice music. Cute ornaments.
And I helped create it because I was willing to reach out. I was willing to do something different. I was willing to ask for it to happen in my life.
I don't believe in being a door mat in my life. But I am also careful to not focus on the negative either. What I do focus on is what I want (NOT WHAT I DON'T WANT).
Some of the parameters I've written for my job are: I am respected at work. I practice good self care at work. I take regular breaks. I have all the help I need to care for my patients. I am safe at work. I am effecient at work. I help to create a great sense of teamwork on my floor. I love my co-workers. I have managable assignments. The pace of my workday is easily managable for me. I advocate for my patients. I make a difference in my patient's (& their families) lives.
And yes, I made a list specifically for my Christmas party. Focused on what I wanted.
Ask for what you want. not what you don't want. I blog about it.
A little story if I may...I have the cutest ceramic pin that I wear just above my name tag. It's a smiling head of a nurse. My older patient's really seem to notice it and like it. Sometimes the older lady patients will actually reach out to it and touch it.
Anyway, when I first started on my floor, I was paired with a nurse who had such a scary personality, I could hardly believe that she was a nurse let alone a preceptor. She was short with me, gave me rude looks, talked about me in the break room to other nurses, and was frequently gone on smoke breaks which she called breathing treatments. Yuck!
Well, half way into my orientation, she was really acting vile. And one morning I caught her in an ante-room having the nurse assistant take her blood pressure. It was sky high and she wasn't happy about it.
Come to find out, there was more going on with her than I knew. She was a divorcee. Her husband left her for another woman. She never did get along very well with her step kids so they weren't loyal to her. She never did have any kids of her own. She had a difficult personality to say the least and as a result had pushed everyone away in her life. She was late 50's. She had a dog but he was getting really old. She worried about him.
The high blood pressure? Well, she was in pain and not sleeping well. During my internship she got the diagnosis of Rheumatoid Arthritis. Not good.
Well, when I was finally on my own I found that I still had my check off lists to complete. I asked her if I could come to her house one day and have her sign me off. She agreed.
When I got to her house, she was a different lady all together. She was kind, cooperative, helpful and thorough. She imparted more wisdom in that afternoon than I got out of her in the whole previous 6 weeks. For my part, I showed an interest in her. I got to know her wonderful dog. I looked at collections in her home. She loved polar bears. I got to know her. And what I found out was how lonely she was. Yes, she had created her own lonliness but what a shame.
The next day we worked together there was a gift waiting for me at my locker. It was the nurse pin that I wear on my name tag. She gave it to me with a note that said she felt I was already on my way to being a great nurse.
There was never another cross word between us. From then on, she helped me out. In fact, she actually looked out for me. I spiked bags for her (her arthritis was acting up) and she started IV's for me. She ended up transfering to a floor with 8-hr shifts not too long after that. But boy did I learn a lot.
I learned that there are ALWAYS 2 sides to every story and that EVERY story is individual. Today I am a preceptor and I love it. I love working with student nurses and I often tell the story of my preceptor.
But perhaps being a preceptor is just enough to throw certain nurses over the edge. But because they get a couple extra cents in their paychecks they don't say no. Yes there are some who probably shouldn't be doing it but I know there are others who can't get enough of it.
So the next time that nasty preceptor you've been assigned to gives you a hard time, remember she has a personal life. Her life could be in shambles. She could actually be lonely and frustrated in her daily life. She may have medical problems. If you possibly can, go for coffee off campus some time to "thank her" for her efforts and see if that doesn't help things.
I enjoy blogging on nurse/stress related topics. I enjoy advocating for my patients. And I especially enjoy advocating for my fellow nurses! We really can create the life of our dreams (even the NURSING LIFE OF OUR DREAMS) if we're willing to ask for it.
I don't think there's a nurse alive that can't relate to what you are saying about sleeplessness and anxiety before a shift. Here's some of the things that I do.
First, I acknowledge that anxiety is the state of "living in the future" about something. For me, it usually involves a feeling that somehow my needs won't be met (in that future scenario) or that there's just not "enough" for me in the world. (not enough support, help, resources, breaks, wisdom, back up, etc., etc.)
My solution?
1) Write about it. Write a letter to "the universe" and hash it out.
2) Talk about it with a professional (and I DON'T mean an M.D. Perhaps a counselor of some type. Release some pressure. Don't do it alone!
3) Have some spiritually nourishing (or just plain entertaining) reading materials right at your bedside and start reading if you can't sleep.
4) Affirm what you need in your life with pen and paper. An example of how I do this is: "I have all the help I need at work. I build teamwork at work. I serve my patients well at work. I practice good self care at work. I take regular breaks. I am efficient at work. I leave work on time regularly."
I don't know about you but these are SOME of the things that I can potentially worry about enough to lose sleep over.
So basically, I take all my worries and I ask "the universe" to specifically help me with those things.
Believe it or not, it helps tremendously and is somewhat empowering!
Good luck! I blog a lot about stress relief for nurses. Stop on by. My blog is listed in my profile.
Thank you for your courage to express yourself so honestly. You talked about the horrific things you saw as a PICU nurse. You talked about how you let yourself slip into addiction to cope with it all.
But you've changed that now. You've made a decision to get into recovery. They say that the first step in recovery (from ANY addiction) is to be able to admit that your way of coping doesn't work anymore.
I recently started a blog about how I cope with the stress of nursing. You see, I'm NOT willing to sacrifice my soul for nursing. I LOVE my patients...don't get me wrong. For 12 hours at a time, I am devoted to them like nobody's business. But I'm no longer willing to "keep it all in" and to come home and go into MUTE mode.
I'm not willing to risk addiction, alcoholism, over shopping, overeating, depression, isolation or self-abuse over this career. It's like saying, "Something isn't right here...I'll show you, I'll drink this poison!" Who gets hurt? We do.
Not worth it to be silent any more!
Good for you. Keep doing your steps of recovery. Work with someone who has gone before you. You're doing great!
When things like this happen, I remind myself that I have choices in my life. I can make whatever I want happen in my life if I'm willing to do the daily baby steps required...it's my sincerest wish to inspire other nurses to create their ideal lives too!:typing
And also to their credit, they seek out the nurse (we carry RN cell phones at all times) to ask how the patient has been doing that day. I LOVE when the doctors do that. That way I get to clarify their chicken scratch orders too before they leave.
That's just wrong to think that doctors aren't even looking at their patients at all...that's just wrong