john privett

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1. What are some of the most ridiculous things patients have asked of you?

   john privett replied to mother/babyRN's topic in Humor

   I was once digitally disimpacting an elderly lady. After finding a baseball sized lower rectal obstruction and trying my darndest to dislodge said obstruction, it soon became appearant to me that I was going to need more than one digit to get the job...

2. inquring minds want to know

   john privett posted a topic in Humor

   1.what does the phrase, "you might feel a little pressure" really mean? 2.what does it mean when my doctor tells me to bend over and say "ah"? 3.should my proctologist be smiling when he's putting his gloves on? 4.is the sight of small animals trappe...

3. i've been exposed

   john privett posted a topic in Humor

   unfortunately, the other dat at work, i think i was exposed to something that medical proffessionals are now calling dumb cow disease. its an insideous disease the afects your abilitee to spel. at first you dont notis thet you have a problem, but ove...

4. fun things to do in the recovery room

   john privett replied to john privett's topic in Humor

   go ahead and print what you want

5. fun things to do in the recovery room

   john privett posted a topic in Humor

   1.when they wake up, speak a foriegn language 2.get them dressed and put them in a chair in the hall 3.speak to them without using your voice 4.seriously ask them the same question, over and over 5.when they speak, put your hands over your ears, winc...

6. more fun things to do, by my bro. nurse matt

   john privett posted a topic in Humor

   1.wheel a pt. into someones elses room, and tell them to scootch over 2.while they are asleep, put on a toe tag and pull the sheet over their head 3.just before the anesthesia takes effect, tell them, "dont worry, they dropped all the charges against...

7. Are masturbation jokes allowed?

   john privett replied to JoanieRN's topic in Humor

   i don't know, sounds like a touchy subject

8. call bell responses

   john privett posted a topic in Humor

   1. hello, hello.....hello.........hello 2. welcome, would you like to try an extra value meal? 3. billing and patient accounts, how may i help you? 4. you have reached the nurses station, please leave a message after the beep. 5. at the tone, the tim...

9. SURELY someone will share their sense of humor!

   john privett replied to roth0003's topic in Humor

10. who left this here?

    john privett posted a topic in Humor

    who left this here? i was working in a nursing home. the cnas were getting on my nerves, not doing a very thorough job cleaning up after their pts. i took an attends out of the package, filled it with corn and chocolate pudding, and left it on a bat...

11. 10 things you say at work lay people could get arrested for

    john privett replied to sharann's topic in Humor

    1.i have to stick this up your rectum 2.i need some of your urine 3.i'm going to take some of your blood 4.breathe this in and hold it 5.you have to swallow it 6.i'm going to tie you down, its for your own good 7.we'll inject this into your body, and...