Why can't we all just get along?

LadyFree28, BSN, LPN, RN · Apr 10, 2016

Not everyone is a cheerleader to YOUR own dreams.

I have learned that personal goals are more satisfying to the person achieving the goal.

An athlete once said "I run my own race; when I run my own race, I NEVER lose.

Larry2016 · Apr 10, 2016

Fear is the path of the dark side. Fear leads to anger: anger leads to hate: hate leads to suffering...

Seriously though it sounds like jealousy actually. When people have a good idea comma if others didn't think of it themselves who are around you, there might be a sense of jealousy.

milesims · Apr 10, 2016

Not everyone is a cheerleader to YOUR own dreams.
I have learned that personal goals are more satisfying to the person achieving the goal.
An athlete once said "I run my own race; when I run my own race, I NEVER lose.

Completely agreed and I can see your point.

I know "cheerleaders" are too much to ask for, although I don't see anything wrong with that. I always praise my friends for accomplishments, and I think if everybody appreciated one another, this world would be a better place.

milesims · Apr 10, 2016

I can definitely see your point, Larry2016. It's sad how insecurity can lead to that kind of feeling.

Maevish, ASN, RN · Apr 10, 2016

Hello,
So I'm having a little bit of difficulty understanding this. Why is everybody competitive in nursing?
We're all getting the same degree, and you don't need high marks to get a Masters and/or NP. I've found that many people like to brag and frequently get upset at other people's accomplishments in nursing (for example, grades).
I've noticed this more among my peer group when I started my business plan. They doubted me at first, called it stupid, and interrogated me frequently. Now that my business is up and running, they expect me to hire them into my home care agency and I feel like they're waiting for me to fail. Don't get me wrong, I don't brag. I only talk about it in school when I'm asked about the subject or asked what I want to do after graduation. I know it's this stupid competitive vibe that's going around, and I'd really like to understand how to avoid this negativity.
I'm not talking about all of the students, but it's really becoming a trend.
Why can't we all just get along?

Because there are rotten people everywhere who seem to live to make other people miserable and nursing is no different. You'd think, with they type of care we do, that this would be the field with the least amount of those types, but that's not the case. Even when you graduate and start working there are always those few nurses who never seem to talk except to criticize, or seemingly look for ways to bring someone else down. If no one else feels that way about them, then it's probably you, but if you hear the same things from the majority of other people then it's just them and you have to deal with it. You can "avoid" it/them by just keeping your head down and doing your thing to the best of your ability. It gets easier and easier as time goes on, but it won't ever go away completely. I don't hear you expecting your peers to be your personal cheerleader, but it is sad when people can't be nice and be happy for others when they do well. Just do your best, be there to help if they feel like asking for it, and they won't have anything real to "get you" on. :) xo

milesims · Apr 10, 2016

Completely agree with you.

I suppose that people like that are everywhere, and nursing isn't an exception. We're all human, regardless of our occupation.

Thank you for the advice!

Maevish, ASN, RN · Apr 10, 2016

Completely agree with you.
I suppose that people like that are everywhere, and nursing isn't an exception. We're all human, regardless of our occupation.
Thank you for the advice!

I'm a traveler so I get to go through this fresh every 13 weeks or so and it's not fun. You just do the best you can :-P

SmilingBluEyes · Apr 11, 2016

I have learned to be in competition only with myself. The rest can eat cake.

SeÃ±or V, ADN · Apr 11, 2016

LOL, I love what SmilingBluEyes said! It is very true though, it sounds like OP's class is a bit on the unhealthy-side of competition. Or maybe they're just 'jelly' because you're starting a business? Either way I don't get it. The reality is that there is no competition in Nursing school. Your grade and my grade are not dependent on whether I pass or you pass. If only the top 40 passed then ok, there is competition, but that's not the case, YOUR grade is what is dependent on you passing or not - so as SmilingBluEyes said this 'competition' is only with yourself. Don't let the naysayers bring you down, don't even think about it, do your thing!

LadyFree28, BSN, LPN, RN · Apr 11, 2016

LOL, I love what SmilingBluEyes said! It is very true though, it sounds like OP's class is a bit on the unhealthy-side of competition.

Here's the thing; I have had people who openly tried to compete with me for grades, even in high school; I remember one person who made it KNOWN they competed with me, while I shrugged, kept my head down, and worked my tail off.

I graduated the top 10 percent, had 15 scholarships; I vaguely recall then not having those accomplishments because it seemed to me after all this hype to be in competition with me, what good did it do?

LadyFree28, BSN, LPN, RN · Apr 11, 2016

Completely agreed and I can see your point.
I know "cheerleaders" are too much to ask for, although I don't see anything wrong with that. I always praise my friends for accomplishments, and I think if everybody appreciated one another, this world would be a better place.

I've learned in the hard knocks of my life that people appreciate people who appreciate themselves...just sayin'.