The Divorced Parent Student Support group - page 2

Any divorced parent students out there? I'm in the process and looking for some people with experience :)... Read More

  1. by   NiobiusSwan
    When my ex and I went through custody proceedings, we were required by the court (as everyone in Colorado is) to take lenghty co-parenting classes. In our case, it is parallel parenting, because of our "issues." However, they constantly stressed that the courts (at least here) prefer joint custody. I listened for hours as they emphasized the importance of fathers (get this - they told us that even if the father was an inmate, it was more beneficial for him to be a part of the child's life than not...not sure I agreed on all their points). I really think that unless there is any reason to question your ability to parent, there is no reason you won't get joint custody. Who has been the primary caretaker so far? Has it been pretty well divided? They will look at that, also. And as someone else said, they will take into account the age of the children when it comes to overnights, etc. If the kids are comfortable with you, and you've been an intergal part of their lives, you have a good shot at it.

    If you look at it objectively, what do you think is absolutely in the best interest of the children? Do you think it would be better for them if you had joint custody? If so, then go for it. But don't pursue because you think it's now or never. Parenting agreements are modified ALL the time, because peoples lives are constantly changing, and circumstances change - all of which affects parenting.
  2. by   totallytheresa
    Hi, I know you posted a lot earlier, but I'm a little slow this summer JK. I am a mom who has been divorced for 9 years, have a 10,12, and almost 14 year old. Worked ft till several months ago. Sure, it is tough at times being a single parent, but just keep your goals at the forefront of your mind, work hard, and appreciate your kids cause they really do grow fast! I think it is much more manageable to be a single parent raising my kids alone, than being in a difficult marriage (well really much more that "difficult" butyou get the picture). You can do it!!!!




    Quote from agent
    Any divorced parent students out there?

    I'm in the process and looking for some people with experience
  3. by   RedSox33RN
    Unfortunately, I'm headed down the divorce path now myself. I just came to terms with it the other night - that I'm not happy and need to be out of this marriage.

    I *think* that we will probably be going the mediator route. I want to try to find a home here in our town, so the kids can attend the same school, and work out a joint custody arrangement. He's a good father, and I think that would be only fair.

    I'm not sure how this is going to affect my financial aid stuff though. His name is not on any of it, but I need to call them Monday and find out if I can get more for being out on my own and seperated, and jobless. I really don't want to have to quit before I've started. I've worked so hard to get where I am, and wanted to stick it out until I graduated, but just couldn't. I am too unhappy.
  4. by   totallytheresa
    You should be able to get more financial help once you are officially seperated/divorced. You have a good attitude, about him being a good dad and that is sooo important. Your kids will benefit so much if the 2 of you can work things out in a civil way, and work together to make sure the kids have access to both of you. There is no reason you can't go ahead with your plans, in fact you have even more reason- you have to look out for yourself and your kids! Good luck with it all. Many of us have been through it and if you need advice, just ask Theresa




    Quote from wannaBEanRN
    Unfortunately, I'm headed down the divorce path now myself. I just came to terms with it the other night - that I'm not happy and need to be out of this marriage.

    I *think* that we will probably be going the mediator route. I want to try to find a home here in our town, so the kids can attend the same school, and work out a joint custody arrangement. He's a good father, and I think that would be only fair.

    I'm not sure how this is going to affect my financial aid stuff though. His name is not on any of it, but I need to call them Monday and find out if I can get more for being out on my own and seperated, and jobless. I really don't want to have to quit before I've started. I've worked so hard to get where I am, and wanted to stick it out until I graduated, but just couldn't. I am too unhappy.

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