nurses who don't want students - page 2

I am so frustrated. The nurse I was paired with today was not happy to have a nursing student. If I asked a question, she would roll her eyes. I almost quit today. I had to choke back the tears. I... Read More

  1. by   cardiacRN2006
    I think that most students who post these type of posts do not do so from isolated experiences. Meaning, it's not just one nurse, it's usually a culture at some hospitals.

    I had horrible clinicals at 2 hospitals, and great experiences at only 1. For the horrible hospitals, some nurses would say things like, "where are the little nurse wanna-bes" or "I have a stupid student assigned to me today-great!"

    When we asked questions, they would sigh, or do the eye roll, or give you short, short answers and were obviously pained to be with us.


    People aren't stupid. We can tell when people are having a bad day, or just plain mean.


    There's no excuse really. It's the nature of the job. We help train each other. And it's just not that difficult a concept to muster up enough energy to be decent or polite. I think most students aren't asking for a friend, they are simply asking not to be belittled or made to feel like a heel.

    That's all...
  2. by   bekindtokittens
    Quote from crimsondawn
    I am so frustrated. The nurse I was paired with today was not happy to have a nursing student. If I asked a question, she would roll her eyes. I almost quit today. I had to choke back the tears. I was so exicted to be in L&D today and she ruined it. I stayed up till 1am this morning reading about women and childbirth so I could be prepared with questions and she completely blew me off. My instructor never checks on us. Nursing school is not what I thought it would be. What do I do?
    I'm sorry you're feeling so down. I start clinicals next month and I worry about this problem, because I am too sensitive at times. I understand some nurses don't want to be teachers. By the same token, this nurse should understand that you, the student, did not choose them specifically to be your teacher.

    It may take a bit more effort to keep our problems to ourselves rather than acting it out on others, but isn't that part of being a mature adult? If I were rude every time my cashier at the grocery store was slow, or someone cut me off in traffic, and I got annoyed and acted on it...well, I'd probably be banned from the grocery store or shot by a crazy person with road rage. I let Mr. Bad Driver roll off my back, but that doesn't mean his actions shouldn't also be corrected.

    I fully agree, students need to learn how to let things like this roll off our backs, because not everyone will be friendly and helpful. But putting full responsibility for resolving a situation like crimsondawn's on the student is excusing inexcusable behavior from the nurse.

    Crimsondawn, I hope things have gotten better. You owe it to yourself not to let another person crush your confidence or enthusiasm. You do not have to let this person rob you of a great learning opportunity. Thicker skin, c'mon, you can do it!

    Off topic, I love how Daytonite applied the nursing process to this issue. I'm going to try this on problems and decisions in my own life.

    **There were some replies made as I was typing mine out. I just wanted to say thank you to TakeTwoAspirin for her post. If I have a bad experience like this in clinicals, I will not assume my teacher is going to be less than helpful every day.**
    Last edit by bekindtokittens on Sep 18, '07 : Reason: adding to original post
  3. by   peacelovestar
    Hi OP,
    I really relate to you. I'm not in NS yet but recently I had a new manager at work who was incredibly mean to me. It was my first day with her and she gave me attitude all day. She was racist and when she wasn't snapping at me, she was ignoring me! Then she called the boss infront of me and said that I hadn't done anything all day and that I had given HER attitude. I almost started to cry but decided to just grab my bag and leave, telling a coworker on my way out that I was quiting.
    And now, I've been freaking out ever since. I don't care about the job but I'm terrified I won't be able to handle "mean people" because I do not have thick skin. I would totally freak out if someone was mean to me in a situation like that, especially since I would be so eager to learn too!


    I have read most of the replies and I think they were great. Talking to your instructor is the best idea. I don't know how clinicals work (if you will be back with that nurse or not) but maybe you could tell your instructor what happened and ask "What if this happens again..should I come to you immediately?" etc.

    I also think it's a mixture of realizing that someone might just be having a bad day or whatever else. This is kind of silly but whenever someone is mean to me I always try to picture that something really bad is going on in their life and I start to feel sorry for them. It depends on the situation, and it doesn't always work, but it can usually help me keep a smile on my face, and the tears from coming out!!

    Good luck!
    Last edit by peacelovestar on Sep 20, '07 : Reason: typoooo!!
  4. by   Sabby_NC
    Hi Crimson

    Not all nurses are like that AT ALL.

    You are going to find the 'huffy' ones but trust me most of us are ever so willing to assist and impart knowledge.

    I am presently taking out 3 students at a time with me. I have 40 students in total from their LPN program and I love answering their questions.

    I find most nursing students are so hungry for knowledge and generally interested. Why would I want to dampen that eh?

    It gets better, put this down to experience and move on.

    Sometimes in nursing we get hit with hard knocks. We brush ourselves off, hold the head high and move on.

    Sounds like you are a very interested student.
  5. by   TheCommuter
    Quote from crimsondawn
    I am so frustrated. The nurse I was paired with today was not happy to have a nursing student. If I asked a question, she would roll her eyes. I almost quit today. I had to choke back the tears. I was so exicted to be in L&D today and she ruined it. I stayed up till 1am this morning reading about women and childbirth so I could be prepared with questions and she completely blew me off. My instructor never checks on us. Nursing school is not what I thought it would be. What do I do?
    Here is some food for thought:

    1. Nobody can ruin your clinical experience unless you give them consent to do so.

    2. Nobody else can make you cry unless you give them permission. No one else can knock you off your cloud unless you permit them to get to your head. In other words, toughen up!

    3. Don't arrive at your clinical site with the expectation that the nurse with which you're paired will actually want to help you. Not all nurses are enthusiastic about having students, so don't be offended if their behavior reflects disinterest.

    4. Nurses have the right to refuse students.

    5. Please don't cry over another rude nurse again. I am certain that the nurse who doesn't like students is not going to be losing any sleep over you, so don't allow her to rent space inside your head. She won't lose any sleep over you, and she won't shed a tear over you. That's the harsh reality.
  6. by   dodgerla
    It is really frusterating when you get one who seems to make you feel like you're a thorn in their side, just being there. Hang in there because you may get an excellent one next time!!!!! Just like anything, there are good ones & bad ones. It always encourages me to remember that so that I can make sure never to be like that one day!!
  7. by   dodgerla
    It is really frusterating when you get one who seems to make you feel like you're a thorn in their side, just being there. Hang in there because you may get an excellent one next time!!!!! Just like anything, there are good ones & bad ones. It always encourages me to remember that so that I can make sure never to be like that one day!!
  8. by   TheCommuter
    Quote from dodgerla
    It is really frusterating when you get one who seems to make you feel like you're a thorn in their side, just being there.
    No other person can make you feel unwanted, like you're a thorn in his/her side, unless you allow them to.
  9. by   Shenanigans
    Down here, I dont' consider myself a "guest" when I'm on clinical, given that we actually PAY quite a large amount to the insititution daily (comes out of our fees) to be in said insitutition.

    Strangely, I've never had any problems with nurses while on clinical, and I'm on my last clinical before electives. Mind you, the Care givers I've been stuck around have been really nasty, but I only had to put up with them in first year.

    But of my companions who have RN problems they've told lecturers and usually get a quick change - that's what your lecturers are there for, if they're not, or they blow you off, complain above their heads, you pay good money for your education, you have every damn right to a decent one where you're not getting fobbed off.
  10. by   felixfelix
    What do you do if there's only a certain # of pt's to go around and you're STUCK with that knobby nurse? Find out what her hobbies and interests are and put the carrot before the horse. Sure it's manipulative, but it's a survival strategy that has worked for me many times.
  11. by   Lisa CCU RN
    This nurse may have done you a favor...she just groomed to to deal with the nurses you may work with in the future who on most days don't even want CO WORKERS in the building with them.




    They do of course quickly change their mind when there is a CODE BROWN, then it's like "Can you help me out in room 101?" There is even a please involved.



    People are what they are, don't let one person who was skipped over when they were handing out the "be polite anyway" gene make you quit.
  12. by   NurseyBaby'05
    Quote from TakeTwoAspirin
    Trust me, this will not help! I'm not saying you need to kiss their feet, but be aware that teaching/precepting is an ADDITIONAL duty for them on top of their normal responsibilities. The bottom line is, the patient will always come first and you will generally get whatever is left over after that! They don't stop being responsible for everything else just because you are there.
    This is pretty much it in a nutshell. I really like to help and to teach, but I can't be your primary resource. It should be your instructor. If you have questions about how to do a procedure, you really need to go to him or her and learn the "by the book" way. The way I show you may not be the way your school wants things done.

    Also, it's easy for me to feel descended upon by vultures when everyone crowds around me at once, wants info, looks up every med at the pixsys (instead of having the info ahead of time), hounds me about a dozen minute things while I'm still in report for my other four patients. Yes you have Mr. X as a patient, but the rest of the floor will not come to a standstill while you take care of him. Someone has to take care of the rest of the folks and it's probably me. Give me a chance to get report, get my things situated and maybe poke my head in on the most critical of my assignment. Then, I'm all yours, Sugarpie! :spin:
  13. by   APBT mom
    Same thing happens at our clinical site all of the time. The vast majority of them act like they don't want you their. They're only nice when it involves something that they don't want to do like code browns, bed baths, emptying trash (yes some facilities have the nurses do this). First don't quit that means you let them get what they wanted. Second tell your instructor even if you have to search the hospital for her/him. If it happens once it's a bad day if it happens constantly it usually has something to do with their duties (too much paper work, new admissions, codes, etc), very rarely it's just the way the person is. We know what we are able to do on our own so when we first get there we go to see who's on the floor. Then we ask them if the have anything that needs to be done (VS, BS, baths, feedings, code browns). Once we've done that then we let them know if they have any procedures to let us know and tell them what we are able to do. If you volunter to help them with their jobs first usually they are more willing to answer questions, give you procedures, allow you to watch things that you aren't able to do, etc. Hope this helps.

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