Are You Being Bullied in the Classroom - page 2
Hi guys I had a situation in class yesterday where i was the victim of bullying by a number of other students. Briefly, they were making fun of my level of class participation. It was not in fun... Read More
Mar 22, '07Quote from DanishInteresting you should say that about test results. That's exactly what happened today. The bully didn't ask - she sent one of her lackies to do it. I thought about telling her to mind her own business but didn't want to lower myself to their level so I just told her. One of my tutors approached me today and has offered to counsel me in dealing with the bullying. I'm meeting with her next week.We HAD a few in our class, but they are gone already. Some people sit in their little clique and laugh and make smart comments, but those are the ones looking over your shoulder at clinicals and asking you all the questions. Also, after every test, they want to know what you got. I just laugh (especially when there is a curve set and they fall short )
I feel like I have a goal to reach and Im not letting anyone stand in my way. They are just in it for the short term and will not last once they/if they make it out there in the real world.
Mar 22, '07Jayfa
It is a sign of their weakness...trust me. Just do what you have to do and stay away from the ones who try to bring you down. They will be gone before you know it.
Im on lunch break right now from my peds clinical and heard 2 students talking in the parking lot. Just being nasty about another girl in the class. I wanted to say something, but just kept walking. Karma is an amazing thing
Mar 22, '07Some people have the worst personalities. Maybe they are trying to encourage you to participate more or maybe they really are bullies. Regardless, nursing requires us to step out of our comfort zone and to become the leader. The one who takes risks and makes choices confidently. Just remember your not there to make friends... your there to learn. If you need to work on anxiety related to poor self concept then do so but do it because you want to be the best nurse you can be and not to please your classmates.
As for the original question, I have not experienced bullying and tend not to engage in discussions related to things other than the current nursing subject being discussed.
Mar 22, '07Last semester, I watched, with amazement, one person from my clinical group, tell off another student (bullied her), on our last day. The student bully told the other student that our entire class was against her. It was horrible and it was untrue, as I let her know. God, I thought she was going to quit but she was stronger than he. The cliques inare awful, they cause these problems and it's usually ONE person that's steering the wheel and setting the others off. These types of personalities are present at every level of nursing. What is even more discerning is that I have friends that are not involved in nursing but are very much aware of how cruel nurses are to each other. Unfortunately, there are many instructors who run unchecked with the same attitudes leading to the loss of many future nurses. When is this going to cease?
I am sorry that you were bullied by you classmates and your supervisors or your instructors.....but there are many nurses out there that are keenly in touch with this behavior. As a student, you will come in contact with alot of them when you are doing your clinical rotation in the hospital. If if were not for those nurses, I think I would have have an even dimmer view.
Mar 22, '07Quote from Jayfa" the test? Oh I did really well again, 98%. How about you?"Interesting you should say that about test results. That's exactly what happened today. The bully didn't ask - she sent one of her lackies to do it. I thought about telling her to mind her own business but didn't want to lower myself to their level so I just told her. One of my tutors approached me today and has offered to counsel me in dealing with the bullying. I'm meeting with her next week.
good luck, stand up for yourself and dont let them see you sweat.
Mar 23, '07Quote from moongirlI got 88%. Lucky in China, but I should have done better. First one though, so the next one I'm determined to blitz. Congrats on your score :spin:" the test? Oh I did really well again, 98%. How about you?"
good luck, stand up for yourself and dont let them see you sweat.
Mar 23, '07good lord hon... i'd start a new. that's an uber-toxic environment. i don't know you find the strength to keep going back
Quote from CRNI-ICU20So...to answer your question...of were any of us bullied....
Yes...I have been....
Alot in nursing...
When I first rec'd my RN...a supervisor made fun of me in front of other nurses that since I didn't attend a traditional , "I must have received my nursing degree in the mail"...and walked off and laughed...
I graduated number two in the state that year...and no...it was just as hard if not harder to do it the way I did....but I did it to save myself and my children who had been abandoned by my ex (their father)
On another occasion, I was ganged up on by a hateful night shift bunch who used to tamper with my IV rates, (I caught one of them cranking up the pump to 999 on a CHF patient) When confronted, she lied and just said she was trying to clear the air out of the tubing...a patent lie...
I took it to my supervisor....she wasn't even reprimanded...but I started taping all my pump switches and lockouts....so I could keep a close eye on my drips....this same night shift was ruthless with others....very clique-y and backstabbing.
I went to day shift, and one night shift nurse went to the day shift RN's and told them that "you're going to have trouble with her..."
I had never been out of line with any of them...ever...
Once I was on call....and to "punish" me, they all had ONE PATIENT each...and they called me in to take a patient who had already died to do post mortem care....while they all sat on their butts and watched me...
Yup...sometimes, there are some real demented people in the nursing profession....
There have been more recent episodes....whereby a chaplain took notes on her perceptions of what I was saying to an out of control family member...I mentioned this on another thread...and painted me as some sort of jerk to this family member....then took it to my boss...who then called me in her office an proceded to reem me out...
There was and incident where a lab person began to yell at me over the phone, so I just hung up on her, and was told by my supervisor that "this does not reflect the values of _______Hospital. "....to which I said,"her yelling doesn't relfect my personal values of taking care of myself...and if she yells at me again...I will hang up on her again....there is nothing in my job description that says I have to listen to that" and "when you write a policy that says I have to....then I will."
She backed off...but I know that this will somehow be woven into my yearly eval....which is just another way to bully someone...demean and tear them down...
I think the spirit of this is all about CONTROL....
Keeping person cowered and subjugated is the name of the game with these people.
Mar 23, '07Quote from JayfaI got 88%. Lucky in China, but I should have done better. First one though, so the next one I'm determined to blitz. Congrats on your score :spin:
.. no.. I was telling YOU to always say you got a 98! that will stop them from asking!
Mar 23, '07Quote from JayfaWhen you say your level of participation, what, exactly, do you mean?Hi guys
I had a situation in class yesterday where i was the victim of bullying by a number of other students. Briefly, they were making fun of my level of class participation. It was not in fun - it was nasty!
I have a class presentation due next week and am considering making class bullying my subject. The tutor has been advised.
So, all you students and new graduates out there, I'm doing a survey on whether you've been bullied in class and, if so, how did you deal with it?
I'm hoping that I can get my message accross to these people without having to involve the Institute and without confrontation.
I would appreciate your input. Thanks.
I've been in a few classes where one student had a comment/question/story for every sentence the instructor managed to get out. In those cases, the offending students were eventually "bullied" to get the offenders to hush it up! The rest of us were not happy getting through only half of the material we were tested on and the "talker" didn't take subtle hints very well. This may not be the situation you're in, but I had to play devil's advocate, as usual. :spin:
Mar 23, '07here are some weblinks you might find helpful in getting information for your presentation. i think some information about assertiveness should definitely be a part of your presentation. one of my links is a tutorial from an australian company. is bullying a common problem in your neck of the earth?
http://changingminds.org/techniques/...ertiveness.htm - assertiveness
http://www.dlsweb.rmit.edu.au/toolbo...t/assert00.htm - this is a really nice online assertiveness tutorial from australia. click on the links to proceed through the tutorial. includes sound clips of examples.
http://www.gp-training.net/training/...ness/index.htm - assertiveness for doctors. an interesting site that links you into information about being assertive. includes a list of books with information on assertiveness.
we had to read games people play: the basic handbook of transactional analysis by eric berne, md for my group psychology class. it's mostly about one-upmanship and how people manipulate and "play" other people against each other to get their own way. it's very enlightening as to how people can manipulate. recognizing what is going on is the first step to overcoming it.
Mar 23, '07Ive noticed alot of classmates being immature, but it's mainly the 21 year olds. I just stay away from them.
Mar 23, '07To Miss Arron:
The incidents mentioned spanned over about 15 years, and encompassed three diff. hospitals...
The current one is the incident mentioned regarding the chaplain and the lab person...
Yes...you are right...it is so toxic that even rats run away!
I stayed, and am staying because of the divorce I am now in...if I leave the job I am at, the opposing attny. gets to take more pot shots about me leaving a job to "decrease my income"....and then not pay my ex the spousal support he thinks he deserves...(not kidding you!) The rat bastard hasn't worked in five years....but believes he deserves support (vive la equality!!)...and until the State of Illinois and other interested parties get their heads out of their collective sand traps, I will have to stay put....it would be just one more thing to delay an already overdue divorce...
I get my strength from God....plain and simple....and I look to the fact that I am very proud of my nursing career...that I survived some horrendus times, and that I raised two beautiful children who are good functional people in society....( I did somethin' right!)
Thank you for your support and concern...
As soon as that ink is dry on the decree, I AM OUTTA HERE!!
The traveler nurses have already been knockin' on the door....and believe me, I will be negotiating my fees....heheheheh!
Mar 23, '07Look up on the internet "horizontal violence". We had a guest lecturer come to talk about this just a few days ago. It happens in all fields, and nursing is one of them. It's sad that it's already happening while still in nursing school. These same folks will likely carry on this same behavior into their jobs after graduation.
The lecturer was doing her MSN research on this topic. It's where there is a work environment of harassment, abuse, emotional abuse, bullying, bellitling, etc. You get the picture, it sounds like this is happening to you. I applaud you for being proactive in addressing this in front of your class. The instructors ought to be the ones who put a stop to it.
It's never happened in our class, but I had a friend who experienced it a few years ago in this same school. A clique decided they didn't like her because she asked a lot of questions in class, which interfered with their right to get out of class early, lol. It was hard for her and she's a perfectly nice woman as well as a great nurse now.
The hospital where I do my clinicals is trying to do something about this by labelling these personalities as "low performers" on their eval's. If they refuse to change, it is supposed to end up with them being fired at some point. We'll see, with the nursing shortage who knows if admin. will back it up. Of course, they don't take into account nurse turnover and nurses not wanting to work on floors that have this kinds of toxic environment.