Worst patient experience

LoriAlabamaRN · Nov 15, 2005

Quailfeather... I am so, so sorry. I cannot even begin to imagine the pain. I am so thankful that God blessed you with another grandchild, and his sister will watch over him, I'm sure.

Lori

**RosesrReder, BSN, MSN, RN** · Nov 15, 2005

wow, these are some experiences. Thanks for sharing.

JohnBearPA · Nov 23, 2005

Had to share on this one.

My worst experience was a little over a month ago. My Mom, at age 56, was dx'd with Vulvar ca. I was still in nursing school at this point. After being admitted to her local hospital for pain management, and driving over an hour each way to spend time with her almost daily, I got her transferred to a SNF near my home. The day I graduated, I got a call at two AM to get to the hospital ER stat. Mom had a bleed, and needed emergency surgery to stop it. I of course stayed in ICU all day with her, and even had my school program director give me my school pin early to have mom, who was also an LPN, pin me in the ICU before my graduation ceremony. I did make it to graduation, and went back to the hospital immediately after and showed Mom the videotape to make her feel a part of it, which she was, having made me realize how much I really wanted to be a nurse.

Time went on, and I took a job at the facility Mom was a pt at. I didn't do direct care, but she was in my hall. I watched her steady decline, taking my lunch breaks to feed her and talk with her when she was lucid. I even did charting and any other paperwork I could in her room, just to be there. Days off were non-existant, because I was always there whether on-the-clock or not.

Well, the end was finally imminent. I was on the 3-11 shift, and watched Mom spiral down to the point I knew I'd lose her that night. At the end of my shift, I called my significant other, and suggested he get there stat, because Mom was going. At two in the morning, Mom expired with my s/o and I holding her hands. I still don't know how I walked out of the facility that night under my own power and drove myself home.

Now my nursing career is just beginning, at another LTC facility. I just couldn't bear to walk down the hall where Mom expired and give care to the pt that was assigned her bed.

Would I have done it any differently? NO! I did what I needed to do, and can hold my head high and realize I gave Mom all the dignity I could and was there as often as possible. Did I learn anything from the experience? YES! Life is short, and very fragile. I think I take that lesson to work every day, and have learned to live every moment to the fullest, because you never know when it'll be your last.

Thank you for letting me get all this out. It's the first time I've written or spoken about it since Mom passed. I think the bad experiences make you stronger, and no matter how painful, can serve to make you a better person. God never gives you more than you can handle, and you can always grow as a person, no matter how horrible the experience.

MarySunshine · Nov 23, 2005

Thank you for sharing, John. I find that the healthcare workers who have been closely involved in loved one's healthcare are often the most compassionate. It sounds as if your mother died as well as any of us could hope for.

MichaelLooney · Nov 23, 2005

This is what actually lead to me being terminated:

I had a resident who gave everyone a little bit of trouble, but nothing major. She liked to wonder into people's rooms and mess with their things, which usually angered the other residents.

One day I hear a resident yelling at her, but she's not listening. So I go in and redirect her across the hall to her room, and decided to go ahead and help her to use to toilet. Told her everything I was going to do, and she was compliant...until I close her door. THEN she turned into this raging tiger, grabed both of my wrists and slamed me against the door, growling obsenities and telling me she was going to kill me. This was like a 180 from her normal self, where the most we ever got was some carcatic remark from time to time.

Scared the heck out of me! Twisted my wrist, giving me stress fractures, and was literally holding me up agianst the door by them. I mean, this "defenseless little old lady" was acting and sounding like she was ready to kill me. I'm yelling for help, no one's coming, and I don't know what I'm going to do.

She finally releases her grip enough for me to get away from her, thankfully~!

hidesert · Nov 23, 2005

hey, your posting brought tears to my eyes. what a great story. i am so glad you are in nursing.

UM Review RN, ASN, RN · Nov 23, 2005

I was a teenager working in a nursing home as a nurse's aide when my dad had a hip replacement operation at the local VA. The procedure was fairly new. At first Dad seemed to do well, but within a few days, he began c/o serious pain in his left side. He was pale, feverish, couldn't feed himself.

I'd go over to the hospital after work and feed him because he was too weak. The staff complained that he was "faking." We chased doctors, nurses, anyone who would stand still long enough, to tell them that something was seriously wrong.

Two weeks went by like this while we frantically tried to get the doctors' attention. One night at work I got a phone call that Dad was going in for emergency surgery. He lost his lung due to the PE that resulted after the operation, and it nearly cost him his life.

Nothing ever happened to the docs that negligently ignored Dad's increasingly serious symptoms.

rn in 3 years · Nov 23, 2005

This is what actually lead to me being terminated:
I had a resident who gave everyone a little bit of trouble, but nothing major. She liked to wonder into people's rooms and mess with their things, which usually angered the other residents.
One day I hear a resident yelling at her, but she's not listening. So I go in and redirect her across the hall to her room, and decided to go ahead and help her to use to toilet. Told her everything I was going to do, and she was compliant...until I close her door. THEN she turned into this raging tiger, grabed both of my wrists and slamed me against the door, growling obsenities and telling me she was going to kill me. This was like a 180 from her normal self, where the most we ever got was some carcatic remark from time to time.
Scared the heck out of me! Twisted my wrist, giving me stress fractures, and was literally holding me up agianst the door by them. I mean, this "defenseless little old lady" was acting and sounding like she was ready to kill me. I'm yelling for help, no one's coming, and I don't know what I'm going to do.
She finally releases her grip enough for me to get away from her, thankfully~!

How did you get terminated for that? Seems like you did nothing wrong.

gr8rnpjt, RN · Nov 23, 2005

He lost his lung due to the PE that resulted after the operation, and it nearly cost him his life.
Nothing ever happened to the docs that negligently ignored Dad's increasingly serious symptoms.

Angie, a similar experience happened when I was in nursing school. My stepfather had knee surgery (1970's) and at that time the length of stay was about 7 days. About 4 days in I got a call early in the morning at school that my dad was being rushed to emergency surgery--massive pulmonary embolism. He almost died that day and although he lived many more years, he was never the same. He passed away 2 years ago in hospice for his chronic lung problems that plagued him since this incident.

My worst patient experience however, would have to be the 30 year old HIV+ mental patient we had come in for treatment. He had been picked up in a playground near the hospital. he had been going around kissing all the kids in the playground. The parents had called the police because, although his HIV status was not apparent, he had open sores all over his mouth and lips, and apparently was trying to spread his "love" around...

oneillk1 · Nov 23, 2005

I was looking after a man in orthopaedic surgical ward, I was a completely green new RN fresh out of school. He had one of those motorised scooters because he had some kind of walking difficulty (it's been a while can't remember exactly what). I hadn't seen him before as I was coming back after days off.

Anyway I went to give the patient his meds about an hour into the shift, noticed there was a psych med on the list. Thought it was strange as we had not been given any handover whatsoever about this guy having a psych history. Go into his room and he wasn't there. I figured he's gone outside for a cigarette as he had been doing that. When he was not back up after I finished doing everyone else's meds I got concerned (ad it was raining and getting dark by then). To cut a long story short after involving the hospital security and subsequently the police he was found about 5 km from the hospital on a main highway trying to get himself run over by a truck. It turned out that he was schizophrenic and the orthopaedic surgeon had reduced his meds because the patient told him the dose was written up wrong!!!:uhoh21:

And of course i got rapped over the knuckles for letting a patient out of my sight (i'm sorry I thought it was a private hospital not a prison) and the surgeon got nothing said to him

HappyJaxRN · Nov 25, 2005

Thank you for letting me get all this out. It's the first time I've written or spoken about it since Mom passed. I think the bad experiences make you stronger, and no matter how painful, can serve to make you a better person. God never gives you more than you can handle, and you can always grow as a person, no matter how horrible the experience.

Wow....what an extrordinary experience. Sorry to read about your mom's passing. It's always hard to loose a parent. I know what you're going through. I lost my mother to complications of a lung transplant and I'm a Transplant Nurse now. Her death somehow made me stronger. I made her promise me something after I dropped out of LPN School. I told her before she passed away if she didn't give up on life, then I wouldn't give up on school. I would go back for my RN degree and not give up. She fought hard for her life. I know she never gave up, her body did. It was that promise that gave me the strength to get through. If I dropped out again, I knew I would have not only failed myself, but failed her and I couldn't do that knowing how hard she fought for her own life. Thank you for sharing. Your story was very touching.

nursejohio, ASN, RN · Nov 25, 2005

I was still in school and working at the nursing home. I was doing nights on the rehab unid. I'd done all my PM care and had everyone in bed around 10. At 11 or so, I could smell "the smell" so I started walking my hall checking on my incont residents first. After sniffing in every room and peeking in more than a couple diapers, I still hadn't found the source so I started back at the end and checked everyone this round.

11:30 and I found where it was coming from. A previously A&O, continent, full code, "walks himself to the bathroom" pt s/p CABG ( a while ago, his steri strips were coming off) had made a huge mess in his pants. Very odd, cause he's usually completely independent and needs minimal assist. I asked him if he was feeling ok, and he said he was a little nauseous and cold. I started to clean him up and it was obviously bloody. Not in a black tarry, upper GI kind of way... but in a reddish-brown, fairly new blood way. After I got his dirty clothes off and his bottom clean, I roll him back over and he's absolutely yellow and doing that open mouth guppy breathing. I yell for the nurse, try to get a BP on him (too low to read on the machine) and try to keep him talking to me. The nurse comes in with the AED and hooks him up. He hasn't completely arrested yet, no shock advised. Squad's on their way, and the nurse is trying to find anything to the MDs number. Squad takes him out doing CPR (cause their AED was working)

Hands down, that was my worst day