there are conflict lovers among us! gack!

[hapeewendy]

The more I see of some of the ppl I work with the more I think I want to spend my time in a forest with trees and animals!

one of my flaws is that I am a conflict avoider...I dont enjoy conflict, I know it happens as we all have differing opinions etc but why on earth do some ppl take such delight in conflict and pitting one person against another?!?

for example, one day we were particularly busy and someone asked me why the orders werent done for their pt yet, I explained that I was the only one at the desk working as the nurse I work with was at a meeting.....so the next day the nurse I work with confronts me saying that I called her lazy and said that I was doing all the work

yeah cuz I'm so great at complimenting myself all the time, hello have you met me?

I calmy explained that I didnt say anything personal, I was speaking about the charts not being done, and If I'm commenting on work type issues then thats different then calling someone lazy or saying I cant stand working with them.

I also took this moment to tell her that her "friend" did her a great disservice by telling her what she told her because a.it wasnt true and

b. it did nothing constructive and caused a conflict between the 2 of us.

she accepted what I had to say but it just made me realize that some people thrive on misery and creating stress and struggle

if I ever get like that could someone do me the kind favour of kicking my butt.......

thanks in advance

peace love and understanding man (or something, hey I wasnt around for the 60's and most of the 70's either )

cheers

[boggle, ASN, RN]

:roll :roll Oh Mattsmom, that is way too funny!! I will definitely remember to use that line!!

Hey Wendy, don't worry about being too nice. Just be sure to be nice to yourself too. If you treat yourself with the same respect it sounds like you treat others with, the strength of your character will shine through.

I find this hard to do sometimes, as the polished triangulators, and friends often catch me off guard. But..... I've found responses such as "ohh that was harsh", or "my, what a personal question" are definite complaint interrupters. Shifts the complainers focus to their behavior rather than someone elses.

Hmm, don't know that I explained that too well......

Anyway, be true to yourself. Being "nice" may just really be acting like a "grown up".

I've enjoyed everyone's input here. You are a greeat bunch!:)

[kids]

Originally posted by MollyJ

kids-r-fun

Try triangulation AND interpersonal relationships

I found a few that way.

Thank you MUCH...found a couple of good articles defining/identifing it and how to deal with it...my Director is very interested in the info...since her Clinical Co-Ord. (me) is about to walk due to the antics of her Staffing Co-Ord.

[shay]

Originally posted by LasVegasRN

Personally, I keep a can of DRAMA repellant on my desk.

I WANT A CAN!!!!