Question about mandatory reporters...

Nurses General Nursing

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Hi everyone,

I've read a lot of posts but had no reason to comment until now. I'm an RN (was a CNA for 12 yrs first), I know if its a patient we are mandatory reporters but what if its a family friend? I'm going to explain the situation but please don't judge because I know what a piece of **** my mother is and have very little contact with her. I'm embarrassed to admit what she's done but there's no other way to explain so here goes...

My family has this long time family friend (my whole life), she's like a grandmother to me. She's 90 yrs old lives on her own and pretty much takes care of herself. Generally if my mother or anyone in my family is going to help her in any way it's to go mop her upstairs floor, no pay, just to help her because its hard for her to climb the steep steps. Her mind is 100% intact & her family helps with other things she needs. So this woman called my sister and said my mother called her asking for $100 to fix her car & if she didn't give it to her she would have to walk To work (it's a 30 min drive). Long story about my mother that I won't get into but luckily she didn't give her the money. The thing is, I can't prove her car wasn't broke down but my dad also has a car and my other sister lives across the street from my mom and has a car. I know she wanted money for my nephew who is a drug addict (another long story), I also know my sister who lives across the street was home because she's a drug addict who never leaves her house, ever!!

Anyway, I'm assuming this isnt a reportable case but I want to make sure. Please no one hold back because its my mother, I have had her arrested before for giving prescription drugs to my nephew who was living with me at the time & in recovery. I know she is an evil person on many levels I just don't know if I have a legal obligation (or moral) to report this?

Sorry for the long post and for any typos. I'm on my phone...

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I'm coming from my social work background....not my nursing one.....but, I don't think this is a situation that you need to report. She asked for money, it wasn't given.

And actually, even it it was given, I don't think it is report-worthy. If your mom asks for $ and the person who gives it to her has a mind that is 100% intact, then she is not incompetent to make that decision.

But....can you have a chat with your friend and just let her know that you think your mom is up to no good and tell her to watch out?

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Thanks for the reply. I plan to talk to my friend and my mother because I know she was up to no good! But even if she was telling the truth (and just knowing my mother I know she wasn't), you just don't make a 90 yr old worry about you like that! It's just so frustrating...

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The idea behind reporting is to protect the vulnerable person (elder, retarded (yes I know that's not a PC term but it is still used clinically), child...) from abuse or neglect. I'm not seeing that happening in your description of this elderly lady.

Now, if your mother begins to harass her or threaten her, that's reportable. Do you think she could be in any danger from your mother? That might be reportable, too.

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My mother is a lot of things but she is a coward and basically harmless, especially when she knows someone knows what shes doing... I talked to her and explained I knew what she did & I knew why she really wanted the money so I'm pretty sure she will leave her alone. Thanks for the replies. It helped to get others thoughts.

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You said yourself she is 100% "there " mentally. If she wants to give money to a deadbeat relative it's her mistake to make.

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