Murphy's Law of Nursing

[Pepper The Cat]

1. The admission they want to send you is always the opposite sex of your only available bed - resulting in bed moves.

2. A certain MD always takes at least 20 minutes to respond to your page - except for the time when you page him and then run to the bathroom - that time he calls back in 3 minutes.

3. The loud snorer is never roommates with the pt who is deaf. No, he is roommates with the light sleeper.

4. Families always want to talk to the discharge planner, social worker, specialist or manager on a Sunday afternoon when none of these people are working. and the get mad at YOU because they are not available.

5. Pts are either constipated requiring laxs, enemas etc, or have exploding diarrhea.

What are your Murphy's Laws?

[englishgeek]

I will be starting nursing school in the fall, so I have no stories to add. But it does remind me of waiting tables.

You stand around picking your nose (figuratively) wishing you had a table, but no one walks in till 10 minutes before shift change/ closings, then you get four tables, at least one of them being phenomenaly slow eaters.

The pickiest people were the ones whose orders the cooks decide to screw up (of course me and my tip are penalized.)

You have no tables then the hostess decides to triple-seat you. (Note: there should be studies done on why only idiots get hosting jobs at restaurants.)

You schedule something after work because you have been slow for two weeks in a row but the college softball team picks that night to come in.

Can't wait to have "real" stories like you guys!

[nursefrances, BSN, RN]

englishgeek said:

I will be starting nursing school in the fall, so I have no stories to add. But it does remind me of waiting tables. You stand around picking your nose (figuratively) wishing you had a table, but no one walks in till 10 minutes before shift change/ closings, then you get four tables, at least one of them being phenomenaly slow eaters. The pickiest people were the ones whose orders the cooks decide to screw up (of course me and my tip are penalized.) You have no tables then the hostess decides to triple-seat you. (Note: there should be studies done on why only idiots get hosting jobs at restaurants.) You schedule something after work qbecause you have been slow for two weeks in a row but the college softball team picks that night to come in. Can't wait to have "real" stories like you guys!

Oh, you will......you will.

[E.Fiore]

Outbreak of the flu, four admissions on your unit, a code blue, and two deaths all in the same shift while you're short staffed. This really happened unfortunately...

[mandy13086]

Lets see what I can add to these...

How about progress notes suggesting the patient will be discharged that day so you do expect it but really they could have gone home a day or so ago from what I thought so idk y they hadn't...but the order isn't put in until 630pm. Of course patient is told about it and is now rushing you.

And...this happened tonight..patient's IV has been great ALL day..granted, she managed to continually get herself tied up in the tubing somehow but I carefully untwisted it all day

.pt calls cuz the pump is beeping (heaven forbid lol), go in there WITH the night nurse taking over so I can give report to find that just NOW she's managed to sit on it so badly she pulled the IV out..and u can only use one arm...and she's a hard stick..AND I had JUST gotten her IV nausea medication ordered cuz what she was getting wasn't working & I was trying to help night shift.

Also..knowing I'm getting a transfer, report called to me around 5..patient not brought down until 6..& I had 2 discharges I was trying to get finished at the same time..plus a couple IV meds that were due at the same time (just before shift change..so nicely timed).

Gotta love murphys law haha.

[CountryMomma, ASN, RN]

2 trach pts across the hall from each other. Pt 1 turns blue and a rapid response is called on the pt d/t trach dislodgment. During that RR, trach pt #2 begins spewing frank red blood and clots out of his well-established trach. Pt #2's nurse is newer and can't reach the charge who is ambu-bagging pt 1. Other wiser nurses are either assisting with the blue pt or doing their start of shift assessments. New nurse panics and calls a RR, unaware of the RR across the hall. (Pt #2's room looked like something out of the movie Carrie.) Across the unit a detoxer gets agitated from all the commotion and flips on his safety aide, triggering a security request for manpower.

We all needed drinks after that day.