Manipulated by patient family :(

Nurses General Nursing

Published

Specializes in ICU.

Have you ever been manipulated by a patient's family? Well, it sucks. I don't want to go into all the gory details here, but the long and short of it is, I now understand why there are nurses out there that are not communicative with families.

Sure, some would argue that miscommunication can happen, but this was a case of pure manipulation.

I've learned an important lesson. When your gut tells you that something isn't quite right, remove yourself from the situation! Families can be creepy at times. This one wanted copies of accident reports so that she could pursue a lawsuit, wanted copies of test results, etc. (which I of course, did not give her!), and then misconstrued every word out of my mouth so that I came out looking like the ogre and the guilty party. I reported the family member to my nurse manager, but I still feel lousy.

Once burned, twice shy . . . :o:madface::nono:

Specializes in SICU.

Yep, it only takes a time or two before you learn your lesson...

Sorry, hun... (((BIG hug)))

Specializes in LTC, Med/Surg, Peds, ICU, Tele.

Yes, I've been manipulated by family. Keep your guard up at all times.

Specializes in Med Surg, Hospice.

One family TRIED to make me feel guilty for not fixing an IV, even going so far as to tell me what my job was when my back was turned. I spun around and reiterated that IV's wer NOT in my scope of practice and I could only tell the nurse about the problem. Thank God I didn't have to deal with them after that. Sometimes there are advantages to working the other side of the floor. :devil:

Specializes in Palliative Care, NICU/NNP.

Yes, I'm sure most of us have and it doesn't feel good. Sorry for your misfortune but they will probably twist everyones' words when they get refused what they want. Don't be surprised if this hits administration but it won't be about you, it'll be about their not accepting HIPPA regulations. They'll huff and they'll puff...

Almost one of the ten commandments for working in home health. If you never get a family that tries this, even innocently or in the most subtle manner, you haven't worked hh very long. Almost every family will try to get a little more quid pro quo than what is called for in the situation. Many nurses fall for this and actually actively participate in the games being played. All of this behavior usually brings about some kind of lower level of care for the poor patient who is caught in the middle and may not be able to speak for themselves or make their wishes the first priority. You have to learn to develop a shield for this early on. Good luck.

Oh, and I forgot. There was an RN on one of my cases that was open about the fact that she was making copies of the medical record for the family to use in their lawsuits. I once told my manager. He acted speechless and naive.

Specializes in Hospital Education Coordinator.

Making copies is a HIPAA violation and probably a violation of corporate compliance. This "evidence" could help the famly LOSE their case since it was obtained illegally.

I'm confused.... I'm not a nurse so maybe I'm not understanding. I thought that the patient had a right to their own records if they wanted them. ??? Why can't you give them a copy of their own records???

Specializes in ICU.
I'm confused.... I'm not a nurse so maybe I'm not understanding. I thought that the patient had a right to their own records if they wanted them. ??? Why can't you give them a copy of their own records???

Patients have access to their records, but it has to be through the proper channels. I, as a bedside RN, cannot give them test results and records. A physician can't give them copies either. The physician can discuss test results/outcomes/etc. But in my hospital, the patient must obtain their records through medical records and not through the bedside RN. All health care institutions will have something like this in place.

Although it is the patient's information, the hospital has to make sure that the information is going to the proper person/parties for HIPPA purposes, and not being mis-used or abused. Also, it has to go through proper channels so that chances of mis-interpretation are reduced/eliminated. For example, if you want to see a test result, it generally has to be in the presence of a physician so that the physician can aide in understanding of the result, etc.

It's a complicated legal issue . . ., but one that is explained in the patient bill of rights in each health institution. The staff are educated on these matters . . . if only families would bother to read instead of blame!!!

Specializes in ICU.

Thank you all for your support. It just feels good to know that others are out there who can understand and commiserate. I'm sorry this happens to anyone at all . . . . But thanks for being there!

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