Re: Family Doesn't Want Patient To Know? Originally Posted by KyPinkRN 
I have never advocated keeping a patient in the dark about their diagnosis. On some unconscious level I think they know anyway. Most patients can sense if you are not being completely truthful with them. This creates mistrust at a time when they need to trust us the most.
I totally agree with this, and I guess this is really what my thoughts are. I have trouble trusting when I am vulnerable (like as a patient/client in a setting where my hands are tied) and can definitely see myself being unable to accept logical treatment reccomendations or care due to mistrust issues.
Originally Posted by KyPinkRN That being said, I always respect the families' decision to tell or not tell. They know their family member better than you, however I always tell them about the trust vs mistrust part. Keeping a patient in the dark about the diagnosis makes them isolated from those "in the know".
I can't help but think of my family, and I know that certain of my loved ones would answer this entirely different than others, just based on their own beliefs/attitudes towards life. I would hate, for instance, to have my mother making this sort of decision for me, because as much as I love her, she always feels that its more important to give the impression of normalacy and minimize drama/pain than to deal with issues head on.
I'm 100% certain that she would feel that she was doing me a service by keeping information from me, based on her past attempts to "protect us" (myself, my sister and my father). She always means well and I love her more than life, but her belief in making everything "seem" perfect regardless of the reality has been problematic throughout my life.
My husband on the other hand, would know and agree with my wishes to never be lied to, as that has been the very foundation of our marriage. I would never worry about him not doing right by me in that regard. No matter how bad the news, he would want to be there to help me through it and help me deal with it, which is what I would want.
I can't help but wonder for myself...what would happen if my husband was not around and my mother was responsible for that kind of care decision...and also I wonder how many other people have families similar to mine.
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