question about how to respond to rude family members

Nursing Students CNA/MA

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What is the accepted way to respond to rude and demanding family member when working in a nursing home? My employer seems to just accept it as is. I had a family member tell me that they had someone fired for the same minor mistake I made. I just didn't know what to say or anything at all.

Unfortunately, you will come across a lot of people like this. If a family member complains to me, I make sure they know they are heard and I tell them I will do the best that I can. If they are demanding, like they want their family member in bed right now, do it. Don't give them a reason to complain about you to your supervisor. I like to hold the saying "Kill them with kindness" close to me when dealing with a rude/demanding family member.

Also, mistakes happen! If you are worried or have questions, talk to your supervisor.

What PP said, plus document if possible. If they are asking you to do something that is within your job description, then it is just fine. Some family members have tried to ask me to do things that are just not possible. Here's a good example:

One family in a hospital I worked in as a sitter, through a registry, were leaving their family member for the night and knew I was sitting the whole night. They asked me if I could be responsible for their very expensive rosary that was imported from Italy and had all these precious gems in it. I said very politely, it would be best for them to turn the rosary in to security or take it home because I have to take breaks and lunches and could be swapped with someone else.

Sometimes, just saying "Thanks for sharing" and moving on is the best thing to do. I would say that unless it was going against the care plan or endangering the resident, it isn't worth worrying about. Document, for sure, but don't worry about it too much.

Specializes in Gerontology, Med surg, Home Health.

We all run into rude family members. If they are consistently rude or inappropriate, we call them in for a family meeting and explain that we don't allow our staff to be belittled or yelled at. Most of the time it works.

I have had families constantly complain about the food, the room, the staff.....I politely tell them I'll be more than happy to find them another place for their mother/father/grandmother to live. That's an extreme case to be sure, but I value my staff to much to let them be abused.

I will meet their requests if they are reasonable. If they are not, I pass them over to the nurse to deal with.

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