OK, Cultural question here, please forgive the stupidity.

U.S.A. Alabama

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OK, forst of all, for those who do not know, I live and work in Alabama. With the exception of learning Spanish (which was more a hobby than a necessity, and has proven to come in real handy!), I have never given much thought to the rites and customs of other cultures, with the exception of what we were taught in school, until they came into play. It was literally that far between times that I HAD to think about it, and was usually a minor thing, like making sure our Jewish or Muslim patients did not receive pork on their diet.

They didn't teach me this in school.

I have had a number of patients of (and work with several docs of) Middle Eastern descent lately, and I have 2 questions.....I would ask, because shy is about the last thing I am, but I really don't want to look like an idiot or accidentally insult somebody.

1) What is the word for the head scarf that the women usually wear? I work with another NP who wears one, but I'd be mortified to ask her.

2) Is it considered rude of me, as a Christian and as a female, to assess the male patients bare-headed? I see their wives and female relations wearing the whatever-it-is-that-I-don't-know-yet, and am curious. Nurses don't even wear hats here, NPs wear whatever, so I just want some input.

I have no problem with the above, if it is considered good manners. To me, it's no different than speaking Spanish to a Hispanic patient. If it helps me make a positive impression, and makes my patient more comfortable, so much the better for me. My family, on the other hand, thinks I'm a hypocrite, because I am firmly in the camp of "No man's going to tell me what to do". You know, that is how I was raised. This is America. I am a very strong independent woman and danged if I'll kowtow to someone just because he happens to be male. I just won't do it. I am ranked right up there with Obama bowing to whoever it was he bowed to. Do I think it meant anything? I don't know. It didn't strike me as any different than curtsying to the Queen of England. Do I curtsy here? No. There, yes, because I'd be in their country and would want to make a good impression. Same with, I think, Cambodia, where it's considered rude to point the sole of your foot towards someone (the reason being that they consider that the dirtiest part of the body). I would endeavor not to insult anyone.

I don't see this as any different, but I would like some advice. Is it considered bad form to assess someone of that culture bare-headed, while his female relations are covered, or would it be considered MORE rude yet to cover my head, even though I am not of the same culture or religion?

No one has said anything to me. All the patients and docs have been more than nice, and the NP I mentioned before is the only one that wears the scarf, so obviously the docs do not take issue with NOT wearing one. I guess I'm being silly, but this is nagging at me, so if you can shed some light on the subject, this dim bulb would be appreciative.

Thanks!!!

Specializes in Med/Surg, DSU, Ortho, Onc, Psych.

Always ask people re their culture, they will be very willing to talk and share it with you. I ask tons of questions, and people will be very pleased re that, in fact, u probly won't be able to shut them up.

I don't worry too much about right and left hands - I just use what I have available. If it's a problem, the patient and/or family will let you know.

Specializes in Med/Surg, DSU, Ortho, Onc, Psych.
I'm a Christian, have tattoos, don't think they're offensive and cannot find any relevant scripture for today. You can't pull a verse from the Old Testament when it's no longer in practice. Although traditions from the Old Testament are still present today, God promised a new covenant to follow (i.e. the New Testament, see Jeremiah 31:31-34).

You also need to look at the context of the verse. God was sending that message to the Israelites when traveling from Egypt to Canaan. The point was to prepare them and to cast out idolatrous nations ideology. These other nations would mark their body to worship other gods.

So looking at the New Testament, there is no evidence to back up Lev 19:28. I don't see anything wrong with tattoos as long as they are meant to glorify God.

I like most tattoos. I think there is the perception that people with tats are rough and ready perhaps.

We get many Kiwi (NZ) patients in Perth here and some in Adelaide. Their tattoos are stunning. One Kiwi was explaining all the cultural significance of his tats, but I couldn't stand there all day to listen. I love the facial tats, they look really cool! And I love it when they do the Haka! I think most tats look good, but some people go overboard.

Specializes in Med/Surg, DSU, Ortho, Onc, Psych.
hello this is actually my 1st time posting.im am not a nurse yet but i am going to school to be an L.P.N. i am muslim.yes the headscarf is called a hijab.no i dont see why you should wear one because you are not muslim and you do not wear one on normal days.muslims are quite used to dealing with women who dont wear hijab.in most muslim countries alot of muslim women do not wear it.personally i dont wear it either,but that is my personal choice.

it really depends on the person that you are caring for also.muslims like anyone else are people,there are really religious muslims and there are more laid back muslims.some muslims will not let someone of the opposite sex take care of them and some dont mind.islamically as muslims we are supposed to have someone of the same sex take care of us,but we can have them if the someone of the same sex isnt available.put it this way,my doctor is male.but some muslims dont feel that way.once again it all just depends on the person.just make them feel comfortable with respecting their religion,thats all you have to do.most muslims are happy that you ask about their religion so that they can tell you.dont be afraid to ask them if you want to know.

once again just respect their religion,dont try to conform to it unless that is what you believe.hope this helps some.

What a good post Staci! And welcome to AN. Hope you can shed some more light on your culture for us people who don't know too much about it, ie: me!

Specializes in Med/Surg, DSU, Ortho, Onc, Psych.
sorta of a funny story. i had a very sick older man whose family didn't call 911 until he passed out at the dinner table because as the elder they had to do what he said( they were sikhs)anyway when i got him in the icu he was already on the vent and whoever did the tape job on the tube had managed to wrap it all around his beard and even then it was hardly holding the tube in place.well i knew enough that to sikh men a beard is a big deal but there was no way i could retape that tube without cutting his beard because of all the tape.so i did what i had to do,protect his airway(he had really bad pneumonia,couldn't believe he was still alive)well the first thing his sons did when they saw him was not "how is he doing" but basically i think i got cussed out in hindi about the beard.i guess i was not very politically correct with my reply which was "do you want him alive or dead?"they shut up after that.i mean i really did take into consideration about the beard,but there was just no way to get that tape off and resecure the tube without cutting it.i don't think they would have talked to me like that if i had been a man which really ticked me off.i was very young then and not so "understanding" as i am now.:cool:

this reminds me of when i was helping out in the ed/er once and i had to cut this girl's jeans off so the docs could do a proper assessment of her after an mva. she literally screamed abuse at me (think of all the really bad swear words and you have it!), as these were her new jeans. well i explained why they were doing this - the jeans were all marked with blood anyway from what i can remember, but she didn't care. sometimes you just can't be culturally sensitive, it isn't possible, but i always explain what i am doing.

Always ask people re their culture, they will be very willing to talk and share it with you. I ask tons of questions, and people will be very pleased re that, in fact, u probly won't be able to shut them up.

I don't worry too much about right and left hands - I just use what I have available. If it's a problem, the patient and/or family will let you know.

I've found this also.... It's a way to show you care about them as humans, not just as patients, and they appreciate the attention to detail by asking them directly.... :) I've had people ask me things that they wondered about various parts of my life, and I'd much rather them ask me than assume anything, or have any questions that are very easily answered. jme

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