OK, forst of all, for those who do not know, I live and work in Alabama. With the exception of learning Spanish (which was more a hobby than a necessity, and has proven to come in real handy!), I have never given much thought to the rites and customs of other cultures, with the exception of what we were taught in school, until they came into play. It was literally that far between times that I HAD to think about it, and was usually a minor thing, like making sure our Jewish or Muslim patients did not receive pork on their diet.
They didn't teach me this in school.
I have had a number of patients of (and work with several docs of) Middle Eastern descent lately, and I have 2 questions.....I would ask, because shy is about the last thing I am, but I really don't want to look like an idiot or accidentally insult somebody.
1) What is the word for the head scarf that the women usually wear? I work with another NP who wears one, but I'd be mortified to ask her.
2) Is it considered rude of me, as a Christian and as a female, to assess the male patients bare-headed? I see their wives and female relations wearing the whatever-it-is-that-I-don't-know-yet, and am curious. Nurses don't even wear hats here, NPs wear whatever, so I just want some input.
I have no problem with the above, if it is considered good manners. To me, it's no different than speaking Spanish to a Hispanic patient. If it helps me make a positive impression, and makes my patient more comfortable, so much the better for me. My family, on the other hand, thinks I'm a hypocrite, because I am firmly in the camp of "No man's going to tell me what to do". You know, that is how I was raised. This is America. I am a very strong independent woman and danged if I'll kowtow to someone just because he happens to be male. I just won't do it. I am ranked right up there with Obama bowing to whoever it was he bowed to. Do I think it meant anything? I don't know. It didn't strike me as any different than curtsying to the Queen of England. Do I curtsy here? No. There, yes, because I'd be in their country and would want to make a good impression. Same with, I think, Cambodia, where it's considered rude to point the sole of your foot towards someone (the reason being that they consider that the dirtiest part of the body). I would endeavor not to insult anyone.
I don't see this as any different, but I would like some advice. Is it considered bad form to assess someone of that culture bare-headed, while his female relations are covered, or would it be considered MORE rude yet to cover my head, even though I am not of the same culture or religion?
No one has said anything to me. All the patients and docs have been more than nice, and the NP I mentioned before is the only one that wears the scarf, so obviously the docs do not take issue with NOT wearing one. I guess I'm being silly, but this is nagging at me, so if you can shed some light on the subject, this dim bulb would be appreciative.
Thanks!!!