You know you've been a nurse too long when:

[curlyfries]

*** Discussing dismemberment over a meal seems perfectly normal.

*** Your idea of a good time is a code at change of shift.

*** You believe in aerosol spraying of Prozac.

*** You believe that "shallow gene pool" should be a diagnosis.

*** You believe that chocolate is a food group.

*** You believe that the government should require a permit to reproduce.

*** You believe that unspeakable evil will befall you if someone should say "Boy, it sure is quiet around here!"

*** You admire a stranger's veins.

*** You have referred to someone's death as a transfer to the "Eternal Care Unit."

*** You don't think a consult with Dr. Kavorkian is inappropriate.

*** You have had to leave a patient's room before breaking into uncontrollable laughter.

*** When ordering labs, you have wanted to order a "feces on the brain" profile.

*** You are astounded when somebody in the lab speaks English.

*** You encourage an obnoxious patient to sign out AMA.

*** You can calculate the "tooth to tattoo ratio" without a calculator.

*** You have ever bet on someone's blood alcohol level.

*** You have used your status to get out of a speeding ticket.

*** You've called in sick on a full moon.

*** You've got voodoo dolls labeled with doctor's names..and lots of needles stuck therein.

*** You believe that every waiting room should come with a valium salt lick

*** You have restrained someone, and it was not a sexual experience.

*** You barely consider the raise your employer offers you, before moving on to another job.

*** You aren't sure who your boss is.

*** You know how to say bedpan in five languages.

*** You keep oxygen equipment in your locker, just in case there's a code on the same day as cost containment is implemented by your employer.

*** You recognize that unionization is professional.

[pghfoxfan]

LMAO! Funny, because they are so true