You A Nurse When !!!

[RN2149]

you know you're a nurse when..

1) the front of your scrubs reads 'nurses... here to

save your ass, not kiss it!'

2) you occasionally park in the space with the

'physicians only' sign... and knock it over.

3) you believe some patients are alive only because it's

illegal to kill them.

4) you recognize that you can't cure stupid.

5) you own at least three pens with the names of

prescription medications on them.

6) you believe there's a special place in hell for the

inventor of the call light.

7) you believe that saying 'it can't get any worse'

causes it to get worse just to show you it can.

8) you wash your hands before you go to the bathroom.

9) you believe that any job where you can drive to work

in your pajamas is a cool one.

10) you consider a tongue depressor an eating utensil.

11) eating microwave popcorn out of a clean bedpan is

perfectly natural.

12) you've been exposed to so many x-rays that you

consider it a form of birth control.

13) you've ever heard a patient with a nose ring, a brow

ring, and twelve earrings say 'i'm afraid of shots.'

14) you've ever placed a bet

on someone's blood alcohol level.

15) you've told a confused patient that your name is that

of a coworker and to call if they need help.

16) your bladder can expand to the size of a winnebago's

water tank.

17) you have seen more memberes than any prostitute could

dream of.

18) you believe that not all patients are annoying...

some are unconscious.

19) your family and friends refuse to watch medical

sitcoms with you because you spend the whole time

correcting everyone and pointing out upside down

x-rays.

20) you don't get excited about blood, unless it's your

own.

21) you've sworn to have 'do not resuscitate' tattooed on

your chest. soon.

22) discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal

is perfectly normal to you.

23) your idea of fine dining is anywhere you can sit down

to eat.

24) your idea of a good time is a cardiac arrest at shift

change. :redbeathe

25) you believe in the aerial spraying of prozac.

26) you believe that 'shallow gene pool' should be a

recognized diagnosis.

27) you believe that the government should require

permits to reproduce.

28) you believe that unspeakable evils will befall anyone

who utters the phrase 'wow, it's really quiet, isn't it?

29) you have ever wanted to write a book entitled

'suicide: getting it right the first time.'

30) you have ever had a patient look you straight in the

eye and say 'i have no idea how that got stuck in there.'

31) you've had to leave a patient's room before

you begin to laugh uncontrollably.

[Advocate1]

I'm gonna Print this and Post it in the Break Room-

Thanks:bowingpur:yeah:

[9livesRN, BSN, RN]

Lmao!!!

[Nurse_Newbie]

LMAO!!! I have to print and post this one too!!! I'm glad I'm not the only one that washes my hands before I go to the bathroom........

[Jellibum]

32) you've used micropore tape to wrap presents for loved ones

[lisab82]

32) you've used micropore tape to wrap presents for loved ones

:) used micropore many a time