Work life career advancement issues. Helpful advice needed.

[Kalipso]

So I'm trying to figure some life stuff and would invite advice. My situation is this: I had a job I loved but after 3 years of driving 70 miles one way to work and debating moving with my husband, came to the conclusion that I needed a job closer to where we live. 2.5 months ago I got a job 25 minutes away and I absolutely HATE the place. My issues are many but I really don't care to go into detail. Lets just say that my new coworkers are use to working in an environment that is poorly managed and, to me, very unsafe. While I can see the good in these people as individuals, I can also see that they are set up to fail and that no one cares to fight the loosing battle to get things right again. That these poor polices lead to care given at a much lower standard than I'm use to giving which gives me very little respect for the facility I work for. Yes I have brought my complaints AND suggestions to fix my complaints to management and their responses have lead me to the conclusion that nothing will change. To be frank, this hospital is a typical hospital, of the 7 I have worked in 5 have been just like the one I work in now. I knew I was lucky with the last hospital I worked in, I attempted to explain this to my husband, but to him a job is a job. You just go do it, come home and forget about it until the next day. The further issues were that my husband has 10 years until he can retire...I'm still 20+ years away and that while I loved my job the gas it took to get there and back sucked a big portion of my pay. Not to mention that I am 33 hoping to start a family in the next year. Complicated by the fact that my husband and I both live 1000 miles away from any family that would be willing to help watch a baby because of my odd hours. We live in a country area that pretty much functions during the day only.

My medical experience is as follows:

4 yrs tech\registar\unit secretary

2.5 yrs cardiac stepdown

1 yr travel

3 yrs emergency peds and adult

So my husband doesn't make steady money as he is a union brick mason, so my job is necessary. I have applied for a ton of jobs and I'm starting to get called for interviews, yay!, but here is what I'm trying to figure out. I applied for a bunch of doctor office jobs. I've never done that but the schedule sounds good, and to be frank I am tired of killing my back moving heavy people and cleaning up messes, of working every other weekend and holiday, and of having to many really sick people at the same time. But I worry that being in an office might kill my skills and critical thinking, also that doctors may not want to hire me because I have too much experience and they don't want to pay so they skip over my resume. I'm willing to accept a loss in pay to have a good schedule. All of the interviews I have so far are at other emergency departments, and while I hate my job I don't want to step out of a bad situation start another job then get called for an interview for a job I want more. How do I play that? Secondly I've been thinking maybe i should apply for OB and L&D to get a 'full spectrum experience'. Like I've done adluts, done some peds, done critical care, but haven't messed with pregnant people over 20 wks. If I could get a partime job doing that on days maybe I could have the full life span experience I want, but how likely is an OB floor willing to hire a nurse new to OB on partime days? So then I thought well maybe I can work part time days in an ER somewhere and go to esthitican school for 6 months and run a part time business out of my house and who know, maybe by the time my kids go to school it will be my full time job? Or is that just wishful thinking? Also how do I explain in an interview why I'm trying to leave a job I just got 2.5 months ago? I don't know but what I do know is thatI need a Day mostly postion ( I currently eork 3p to 3a and that is killing me still. I've worked full nights but could only handle it for 2 years...my body hates it and I get depressed. Best I can do is 1p to 1a it seems) that will allow my to be the mostly primary parent for a baby. My husband is wonderful and willing to let me have kids, he's 20 yrs older than me though and has kids my age, but he has made it clear that caring for them from infancy to like 5 is going to be mostly my duty. I don't really care to get in to the 'fairness' of such an arrangement, if we could contol who we fell in love with I'd be Hugh Jackman's wife, but life isn't that way. I realize there are people in much stickier situations than mine, and I,like everyone else in the world, will do what I need to for things to get done, but if anyone has any suggestions as to what worked for them or why they think one action may be better than another I'd love to hear it.

[firstinfamily, RN]

Kalipso: Nursing is a very dynamic field, because it is always changing it is difficult to maintain current skills for what the market demands. It also seems that nurses get labeled as to the area they are working in: ie: once an ER nurse always an ER nurse. One of the most frustrating things is it seems that when you change jobs everyone wants you to have some form of experience and a specialty certification that applies to the position you want. So, you have to get your ducks in a row before you can actually apply for the positions you are interested in. A career counselor would be most helpful. Because you are the primary breadwinner for your family I guess you need to ask yourself how much money you need to bring in to live at your comfort zone. Warning here: the cost of living rarely goes down!! If you like the ER environment but want better hours what about an Urgency Care center where patients are treated for minor infections, work-related injuries etc. If I understand you correctly, you live in the boonies, so perhaps these type of services are not available. What about out-patient services or out-patient surgery that is provided at the hospital where you currently work?? It is hard to transition into other areas of nursing. I believe the nursing managers need to get a grip and realize that cross-training in multiple departments would really help their staffing issues and also keep nurses from being burned out, bored or what ever happens to make us want to change our positions. As far as weekends and holidays I can tell you that this is a basic part of nursing. There are very few nursing positions that provide day time hours, no weekends or holidays. School nursing may be one that would meet your needs and use the experience that you have, but alas those are rare also and usually the pay is not very much, benefits are usually great. Hope this helps a little!!

[Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN]

I agree maybe urgent care or school nursing if you have your BSN although some school system require masters. After my babies were born, I was 35 and 36, my husband worked the 9-5 5 days a week. I had moved to an area where I knew no one and any family was 1100 miles away. We sacrificed. At one point I worked 12 hour nights every weekend. Then I worked 5p to 1:30a for a while. Then I went straight nights when they were in school full time. One job I really hated but it as convenient and they worked my hours so I shut up, smiled prettily, and did it for my babies.

I saved a fortune on child care. I never missed a field trip (I was popular with the teachers because I was a nurse) or a party.

As my daughter starts college this week and my son his senior year....it was worth every bit of exhaustion.

[firstinfamily, RN]

I did the same as Esme12, I worked night shift for 14 years while my husband worked days, we passed each other in the hall and kept in touch, but mostly we kept our children at home with us. It saved a ton of money for child care, and I knew where my children were and what they were being exposed to. They each started preschool at age 4 which prepared them for kindergarten and learning how to share, raise their hands, be with a group. They socialized with neighborhood friends up until that time. It was hard, we did sacrifice, but it was worth it. Our children have never had behavioral problems, no run in with the law, they are all great adult children now and even though it seemed impossible at the time, we did the right thing. Treasure your time with those who are important to you, the career will be there when you are ready to grab onto it. Money will never be enough and time goes by faster than you think. I was also the primary parent for our children, my husband was there to support me and help but I was the one doing the day to day stuff, it is possible and it can happen. You may lose some sleep, but there is always nap time!!