Why do we do this to ourselves?

LovePurple · Apr 28, 2009

Um. Frankly, it sounds like you're working in a terrible unit. Of course being a new grad is hard, but you shouldn't have to put up with actual abuse, constantly, from your coworkers. I work in critical care, which obviously can be stressful, but all the nurses in my unit love their jobs, and I highly doubt that it's because they're all on happy pills.
You need to make some sort of change, because the status quo is obviously not working for you. Can you switch shifts, days that you're working, to be more compatible with your husband's or friends' schedules? If that doesn't work, you might need to move on, either from your unit or from nursing entirely (but I would really encourage you not to think that the entire field is like what you've experienced so far).
Good luck. Sorry you're in a tough situation.

I know for me, personally, I've looked for day jobs.. and cannot find ANY in the nursing field (which of course is only hospitals, because everywhere else requires at least a yrs experience). The only people on days on the units hiring are the ones who have worked there 5 years and finally got days.... but I would LOVE to have them if at all possible.. just isn't an option right now. =(

NewTiredRN · Apr 29, 2009

wow thanks for all the replies. Its nice to "talk" with others.

I dont think Im being hazed on my unit, but I do think my unit has several of its own troubles now. I dont know if it is any one person's fault or not. I dont think its all managements fault. I dont think its all the organizations fault. I dont think its all the nurses fault. I actually think my managers are good people. I know they have to be tough sometimes and sometimes do things that they dont agree with. And they are human so Im sure sometimes they do things they shouldnt. I think its just a bad situation: no money no help and rising demands as healthcare becomes more of a business every day. And I also think that many of my own personal circumstances make this job more difficult for me than other nurses on the unit who have more experience in all areas of life: school, jobs, family, work/life balance. I dont want to blame everything on the unit. Still maybe if I worked on a unit with more support it might help lessen the load of several factors combining to make life unbearable. If I had the ability to develop more of a social life, I could probably cope better also. If I was married longer or just older that might help. who knows?

It still doesnt change the fact that everyone knows nurses are treated right and it just continues on and on. Sounds a little like slavery back in the day. Thats just the way it was until war broke out. I wonder if nurses will ever declare war on the healthcare system---the problem is we arent united.

My friend made an excellent point: America groans about the nursing shortage but the reality is that there are many

I have looked into other fields. I definetely think I might have a chance to thrive in the non acute care setting. Then again Ive heard that you have to have even more confidence in your skills there.....because you have less support. I would like to experiment with school nursing or home care nursing. But its hard to get those jobs without experience in those particular fields right now. The job market is just so limited. And I am definetely not thriving in the med/surg setting.

I have considered asking for a transfer to ANY job within the organization for now. I have considered leaving nursing until more jobs in other areas open up to less experienced nurses. I really dont know what to do.

My family and friends think I need to get out of my job because they have watched me go down hill. Others think I need to stick it out until I can move into a better position after I have more experience. The problem is by the time I have more experience I might not be ok mentally.

I really do want to help people. And I honestly dont know what else I could do with my life that would satisfy me. I want to raise children one day but the time hasnt come yet-and wont for a while. I had considered teaching when choosing colleges but ended up choosing nursing. and teaching has its own level of stress that might be just as grueling. Although i think all nurses could argue that its very hard to compare the stress of being responsible for whether or not hearts keep beating with other stressors in life. There are some Im sure.

Sometimes I think that Im just young. I went from home to college right into marriage and nursing. Maybe I just need to take a step back- and gain some life experience in other areas. Maybe that life experience would help me cope with the rough waters in nursing. It wouldnt change the fact that so many aspects of nursing are wrong and unhealthy but it might enable me to cope with it well enough to thrive in it.

NewTiredRN · Apr 29, 2009

Sorry I left a sentence unfinished....I meant to say that there are many qualified nurses livining in America.....the healthcare system has just ran them all off....so its less of a shortage and more of retention issue. I know that alot of nurses will retire in the coming years as they reach retirement age but I think theres more to it than that....

Thanks lovepurple. I do want to get out and find something else but I dont know how with my lack of experience....

anyway id love to hear more thoughts....