Who has kids? How do you balance?

Nursing Students General Students

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I have 3 little kids. I do have the support of my husband, However I am struggling if I should move forward with the nursing program. It's a huge commitment and I am scared it will take a bunch time away from my kids. It scares me. I know people will say if you really want it the you will make it happen. However that response doesn't help me LOL. Any advice from people also in my shoes?

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I don't really balance it. I focus on what I need to do to support them financially in the future: They are only going to continue to require more resources. Any time I spend with them is play time, which maybe lasts 10-15 minutes and happens 2-3 times per day. I also take them to school since I don't have to be physically present at school everyday.

It isn't ideal, but you can pull it off for 2-3 years. Lots of people have. 

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I have 3 kids, on welfare, receive a little support from their father (child support/child care) and scored the highest on a fundamentals exam yesterday 92.5. It's extremely possible to excel, you just have to be willing to work hard for it. My home life is difficult but at school I shine brightly. 

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Specializes in oncology.
Conqueror Slothful said:

don't really balance it. I focus on what I need to do to support them financially in the future: They are only going to continue to require more resources. Any time I spend with them is play time, which maybe lasts 10-15 minutes and happens 2-3 times per day.

Focusing what you need to support them in the future will just make you  a an absentee parent.,  So many hours, months, years wasted. The value of being  a parent is being with them when they are young.

But it is probably better to demonstrate that you are an absent father than trying to fake it.  Listen to "Cats in the Cradle"

My child arrived just the other day
He came to the world in the usual way
But there were planes to catch, and bills to pay
He learned to walk while I was away
And he was talkin' 'fore I knew it
And as he grew, he'd say
"I'm gonna be like you, Dad
You know I'm gonna be like you"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
"When you comin' home, Dad?"
"I don't know when
But we'll get together then
You know we'll have a good time then"

My son turned ten just the other day
He said, "Thanks for the ball, Dad, c'mon let's play
Can you teach me to throw?" I said, "Not today
I got a lot to do", he said, "That's okay"
And he, he walked away but his smile
Never dimmed and said
"I'm gonna be like him, yeah
You know I'm gonna be like him"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
"When you comin' home, Dad?
"I don't know when
But we'll get together then
You know we'll have a good time then"

Well, he came from college just the other day
So much like a man, I just had to say
"Son, I'm proud of you, can you sit for a while?"
He shook his head, and he said with a smile
"What I'd really like, Dad, is to borrow the car keys"
"See you later, can I have them please?"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
"When you comin' home, son?"
"I don't know when
But we'll get together then, Dad
You know we'll have a good time then"

I've long since retired, my son's moved away
I called him up just the other day
I said, "I'd like to see you if you don't mind"
He said, "I'd love to, Dad, if I could find the time"
"You see, my new job's a hassle and the kid's got the flu"
"But it's sure nice talkin' to you, Dad
It's been sure nice talkin' to you"

And as I hung up the phone, it occurred to me
He'd grown up just like me
My boy was just like me

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
"When you comin' home, son?
"I don't know when
But we'll get together then, Dad
We're gonna have a good time then"

 

1
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londonflo said:

Focusing what you need to support them in the future will just make you  a an absentee parent.,  So many hours, months, years wasted. The value of being  a parent is being with them when they are young.

But it is probably better to demonstrate that you are an absent father than trying to fake it.  Listen to "Cats in the Cradle"

My child arrived just the other day
He came to the world in the usual way
But there were planes to catch, and bills to pay
He learned to walk while I was away
And he was talkin' 'fore I knew it
And as he grew, he'd say
"I'm gonna be like you, Dad
You know I'm gonna be like you"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
"When you comin' home, Dad?"
"I don't know when
But we'll get together then
You know we'll have a good time then"

My son turned ten just the other day
He said, "Thanks for the ball, Dad, c'mon let's play
Can you teach me to throw?" I said, "Not today
I got a lot to do", he said, "That's okay"
And he, he walked away but his smile
Never dimmed and said
"I'm gonna be like him, yeah
You know I'm gonna be like him"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
"When you comin' home, Dad?
"I don't know when
But we'll get together then
You know we'll have a good time then"

Well, he came from college just the other day
So much like a man, I just had to say
"Son, I'm proud of you, can you sit for a while?"
He shook his head, and he said with a smile
"What I'd really like, Dad, is to borrow the car keys"
"See you later, can I have them please?"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
"When you comin' home, son?"
"I don't know when
But we'll get together then, Dad
You know we'll have a good time then"

I've long since retired, my son's moved away
I called him up just the other day
I said, "I'd like to see you if you don't mind"
He said, "I'd love to, Dad, if I could find the time"
"You see, my new job's a hassle and the kid's got the flu"
"But it's sure nice talkin' to you, Dad
It's been sure nice talkin' to you"

And as I hung up the phone, it occurred to me
He'd grown up just like me
My boy was just like me

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
"When you comin' home, son?
"I don't know when
But we'll get together then, Dad
We're gonna have a good time then"

 

With 46 years experience in the field I have to ask: Why are you posting in the general students section on this topic?

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Specializes in oncology.

the original post was in this topic. Why did you post in the general students' section?

Conqueror Slothful said:

don't really balance it. I focus on what I need to do to support them financially in the future: They are only going to continue to require more resources. Any time I spend with them is play time, which maybe lasts 10-15 minutes and happens 2-3 times per day. I also take them to school since I don't have to be physically present at school everyday.

It isn't ideal, but you can pull it off for 2-3 years. Lots of people have. 

Doesn't this scare you that of 24 hours a day you "play time" with them 45 minutes, and of course the drive to school where your attention is limited?

AS you said in the General Students' thread

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To the OP: Do what you have to do to support and provide for your family and work backwards from there. However much time you are able to carve out of that to spend with your family while still succeeding in nursing school is the best you can do. You have to be selfish with your time because your performance in nursing school is an investment in your family's future. Nevermind the people who pop their head in here to nay say, they have probably not experienced real adversity in their lives in decades.

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