I have a new job in a new school district this year. I am doing case management and essentially managing chronically ill/medically high needs kids and helping coordinate their care, paperwork, IEP/504's, etc. So think along the lines of those families that have so much going on and you get swamped with all the chasing paperwork, calling providers, talking with teachers, etc. I take those kids off the school nurses' plates and manage them instead. So I am realizing how some parents claim to be their child's "biggest advocate" and do everything they can to "fight" for what their kid needs/deserves, yet do everything they can to make getting those services difficult.
I have two cases in particular and the mothers are the reason we are having issues in the first place. One mother (who I am convinced has borderline personality disorder with schitzoid tendencies) has made all of these requests for accommodations for her kid. We all meet and she is hostile the entire meeting. I write down all of her demands and call the specialty clinic for his condition to speak with the nurse. The nurse agrees to essentially write a 504 with all accommodations which we can roll into his IEP. So nice of the nurse. So I am thinking great, all set. Nope! Mom gets the 504 from clinic and is upset that it doesn't have all her requested accommodations and tells the clinic they do not have permission to share it with me. Tells me that until they "fix it" we can't have it. The medical component is the only thing standing in the way of a completed IEP for this kid. I told mom that. But at the same time she is fighting with us that we haven't competed the IEP but she is the reason why ? She asks for all these things but doesn't give us anything in return. Still hasn't brought in a copy of his physical (they are new to our district), still hasn't signed consents for meds at school (but demands he self carry and self administer), etc. ARGH!!!!!!
My other case is an overly involved mother of a very complicated little one who is in a school out of district. Our district provides her 1:1 nurse (district policy). Mom and nurse do not get a long very well, but nurse is competent and providing good nursing care. Mom emailing to complain about every little issue, asks for things, etc. I email her back in response to her "urgent" requests and tell her we are still waiting for doctor's orders, still waiting for her to supply a medication list, still waiting for other things...crickets. So she wants us to provide all these things but doesn't turn in any of the things we need to be able to provide safe nursing care for her.
I just don't get why these parents are the biggest barriers to their child getting the care they need, yet acting as if we are the ones not doing our part. I know I am preaching to the choir here. Just a vent more than anything.
Just got sidestepped by a grandparent for the kiddo who isn't feeling great and wants to go home.
Afebrile, not vomiting , good color and has missed a number of days already taking care of the parent...agreed to stay (it's after noon). The kid agreed a lot of school had been missed to cirumstances of which they have not control and that missing again is not a great thing, that 1:30 left would be ok to deal with...
I've had many parents like this, every. single. year. I just document the heck out of it, all the letters sent, phone calls made, results thus far, and if they finally stop responding, I give them a few weeks, then file all my notes in their chart and document everything in their school record on the computer. Almost every time I do this, I never hear anything back from them until the following year, when it starts all over again. I get this all the time with parents listing a severe peanut allergy every year and never bringing in an EpiPen, etc. However, there's always the exception that needs we absolutely have to chase down. I would get the school principal involved. Sometimes they have the teeth needed to get what we require. Good luck!
NutmeggeRN, BSN
2 Articles; 4,743 Posts
Just got sidestepped by a grandparent for the kiddo who isn't feeling great and wants to go home.
Afebrile, not vomiting , good color and has missed a number of days already taking care of the parent...agreed to stay (it's after noon). The kid agreed a lot of school had been missed to cirumstances of which they have not control and that missing again is not a great thing, that 1:30 left would be ok to deal with...
On the way home per gram...aya yay yay