What can I do to combat bullying?

[Destiny'skid]

I seem to attract bullies to myself.

I was bullies in school and in some previous jobs, but as cna bullying takes on a new dimension.

First off I should say my job does things differently and I don't like it. They put several cna's on a team to care for a floor under one rn. This to me just creates a lot of confusion. the rn doesn't have time to be too involved with the plan and its never clear whose supposed to call the shots so to speak,

now honestly I can put up with another cna telling me what to do or following me around to make sure I do my job right. I can put up with reminding me to follow standards that I know to be true. I run into trouble when the other cna who has presumed herself to be the lead tells me to do something that goes against what I feel is right for the patient.

Its one thing for a nurse to do this because I work under her license but I am not under the license of this cna therefore if the patient complains I will be held responsible.

I've already gotten called out for not answering call bells ect. because the cna was having me do other things. My nurse has made it clear however she has no time for resolving conflicts and I just need to find a way top get along. I understand her not having time Im just not sure what to do when the cna tells me to not help someone because Its more important to do such and such. She even physically grabs me to bring me where she feels I should be.

One or two cnas come in at two and then I come in at five and they seem to think since I come in later Im the bottom of the totem pole. One day I emptied a foley bag charted the amount and gave it in writing to the nurse and the other cna got all huffy that i didnt give it to her. I was under the impression we could not have other cnas chart for us nor were we allowed to give patients info to them yet it happens all the time.

I flat out dont like this system. if we all worked as a team it with our nurse as the leader it would be fine but one cnas seems to always try to be in charge. Also they sometimes designate one cna as the helper. I dont understand what this means but honestly I dont like it. Our job is already so stressful trying to follow the rns direstions and do everything the patients need the way they want it. Its too much to have to worry about another cna bossing me and pushing me around.

How can I be a positive influence? Is this somehow my fault. I dont want to be a problem and I like my nurse and the people I take care of and I want to be a better team player, but I enjoyed much more having my own assignments and just working with other cnas on the floor. Any thoughts?

[SoldierNurse22, BSN, RN]

If she grabs you, report her for assualt. That will stop that real quick.

Ultimately, the only perspon who has authority and is responsible for the patient is the nurse. She or he, whether they like it or not, is the ultimate authority. Do NOT report information to the other CNAs. What if they lose it or don't report it to the RN and then make you look bad? You are a CNA. A Certified Nurse Assistant. You're not a CNAA...with me?

It's not about being a positive influence. You can positive influence away and that won't deter a bully. You need to be assertive in defending your personal rights and boundaries as well as your professional duties.

Do you have a manager above your nurse? This is a good issue to bring up with them...both the structure problem and the bullying issue.

[Hygiene Queen]

Don't you dare let anyone lay a finger on you!

I'm curious if you reported this, because if you did and they weren't interested in that, well I'd quit.

If that aide grabs you again, you need to stand your ground and tell her, "Do not grab me again!"

You need to speak up for yourself.

You tell them that you report to your nurse... not them.

I can't speak to the subject of them telling you to do one thing when you think you should be doing something else. I don't know how you work or how good your prioritization skills are.

There are people who pick on the weak only because they know they can.

You can't control their behavior, but you can control yours.

You need to learn to be firm and speak up for yourself.

Your nurse is right-- she can't resolve your conflicts. That's not her job and she's not your mother.

But by golly, absolutely report it if that aide put her hands on you again.

[Guest707336]

Hi Destiny'skid,

I know how you feel. I also seem to attract bullies in the workforce. I think it's because they take my kindness and quite demeanor for weakness. I was once told by a co-worker that "...a grown woman can't be bullied...". Well, adults bully each other just as school-age children do. I agree with you that as a CNA bullying takes on a whole new dimension. The job is stressful enough without co-workers making it uncomfortable for you. I too work with nurses "managers" who reward bad behavior and seem to be hard on the professional and cordial CNA's. I had a nurse pull me aside last night and tell me that a co-worker complained to her that I don't talk and just come in and start my work. Wow...not even a legitimate complaint and shame on the nurse for wasting her time and mine on such foolishness.

This complaining CNA is mean, miserable, thinks she can assign teams to the other CNA's after she picks the residents she wants to work with and scratches the names off of the ones she doesn't want to work with. This particular night she had to work with a resident she did not like and she took it out on me. The nurse seems to be afraid of this CNA and asked me to ask her who she wanted to trade with me. I did...however the CNA got irate and refused to talk with me. I then told the nurse she is in charge so she needs to assign residents to CNA's. I also let her know that I am not there to make friends and in the future please do not pull me aside over a complaint about my quiet personality. I then spoke with the CNA and pretty much told her the same thing I told the nurse. I also informed her that she was wasting her time trying to intimidate me and that she has a personal problem that has nothing to do with me. There were other CNA's at the nurses station so hopefully the other "mean" ones got my message also. The CNA said nothing, rolled her eyes and walked off.

I think if people just adhered to their job titles and responsibilities then some conflict can be avoided. In my case if the nurse just assigned residents at the beginning of our shift, instead of letting certain CNA's pick and choose...most problems would not occur.

I don't like conflict and you do have to pick your battles, but some people deserve and need to hear that you won't accept their disrespect or won't allow yourself to be an easy bully target for them...misery loves company...but it does not have to be your company.

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

First off, it is NEVER ok for anyone to put their hands on you--attempting to "direct" you or not. And I would be the first to say "do NOT put your hands on me". Don't yell, just a firm tone. If it happens again, I would go directly to the NM, as it is clear that the Charge nurse is "too busy".

As for the other. Ya'll need to be better organized. If you have ideas, write them down, go to the NM and sit down with her and say "it is confusing, the group is disorganized, can we think about setting things up this way.....and give her your suggestions. My immediate thought is there SHOULD be a lead CNA--OR an LPN who is directly responsible for the CNA's organization. The lead CNA can rotate. There DOES need to be someone directing, and it is not always "someone bossing around" but directing accordingly. There should be a distict assigment for each CNA, dividing the residents up accordingly as well.

Another thought is to have staff meetings for all CNA's to discuss how to organize better. If everyone is running and no one is following a specific plan, it can and is a mess. Also, a reminder on appropriate behavior, the steps to take if you are being harrassed, and the consequences if one is the harrasser.

Good luck with this, and let us know how it goes.

[SilenceintheLibrary]

You need to speak up for yourself and stand your ground. And watch this awesome video....