We all know the PIA homless ETOHer and or drug abuser. We also know the guy who really is apreciative of the clean bed, shower and food.who comes into the hosp when homeless.
Yesterday I helped cook and serve food for a homeless shelter. Everyone was nice, generally very clean (one guy smelled). They were articulate, sober, and appreciative.
A disproportionate number were 5 to 600 lbs or more. Kind of ironic that I was feeding them. chuckle. a few looked like the typical homeless. Many you would never in a million years guess were homeless.
As expected there were one or 2 families, a few women but the majority were male. Not only were they male but many looked and acted very able. What happens? Why is this the case?
Being a Christian doesn't mean giving out freebies to ungrateful people who are on a self destructive path. I'll bet a lot of men in that shelter have children out there whom they have irresponsibly abandoned.
I feel it is at times like this that these people need us more than ever. I would feel better helping someone out who is ungrateful than not doing anything for them at all. But that is just me, I guess. : J
Specializes in Addiction & Recovery, Community Health.
P.S.
Many years in special education taught me that tough love works well. Just mix it with compassion and dignity. Very easy to do with children. A little harder with adults, I know.
I just think that sometimes we nurse types are enablers, and that our society should maybe try to build a little character in our weaker members instead of always letting the stronger ones carry the whole load. The pendulum has gone pretty far in bending over backwards to excuse every misbehavior on mental illness, and hurrying to alleviate the hunger pangs of the morbidly obese. It's a little absurd have a soup kitchen cater to grossly overweight people don't you think? I would say that there is something wrong, and out of balance, with that picture.
Being a Christian doesn't mean giving out freebies to ungrateful people who are on a self destructive path. I'll bet a lot of men in that shelter have children out there whom they have irresponsibly abandoned.
Jls - I agree. I believe that having compassion is neccessary, but assisting someone to continue destructive behavior is enabling, and is wrong.
My mom always says... "You never know if that 600lb drifter is Jesus just judging you..."
Now, while I don't really believe he would try and pull one over on us like that, I guess we really just don't know. I don't care who they are, or how they got there, I believe the help I can give them (whatever that may be) is far greater than the damage it would do. While I'm not going to sit there and inject a heroin addict with a syringe, I will provide them with the necessary care to try and get through this difficult time as compassionately as possible. Hopefully it will come full circle and in the end, everyone will be at peace.
It's so nice to come here and hear everyones differing opinions and the reasons behind them. I really enjoy it!!! : D
My mom always says... "You never know if that 600lb drifter is Jesus ..."
Now, while I don't really believe he would try and pull one over on us like that, I guess we really just don't know. I don't care who they are, or how they got there, I believe the help I can give them (whatever that may be) is far greater than the damage it would do (if I did nothing at all). While I'm not going to sit there and inject a heroin addict with a syringe, I will provide them with the necessary care to try and get through this difficult time as compassionately as possible. Hopefully it will come full circle and in the end, everyone will be at peace.
It's so nice to come here and hear everyones differing opinions and the reasons behind them. I really enjoy it!!! : D
Specializes in Addiction & Recovery, Community Health.
I know luvmy3kids.
I was raised Catholic. They said that at school and "how do you know that person isn't an angel checking on you"
Then there is the hymnal with the line "Whatsoever you do to the LEAST of my brothers, that you do unto me".... that one makes me shiver!!!
It never leaves you does it?
I agree, interesting debate here.
Enabeling is not good either. Like I said, I worked with handicapped kids for many years and they will try to use it as an excuse and you can not let them. You have to teach them to reach for the stars. Tough love is needed with lots of just plain love.
I lead with my heart, and yes it gets crushed, but I just pick right up, dust off and move on...
Specializes in Addiction & Recovery, Community Health.
jlsRN,
Rereading 1 of your posts, I just want to say...I agree...The pendulum ALWAYS swings to far. Some balance would be good.
Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish he feeds himself (and his family hopefully) forever.
I see that pendulum thing repeated everywhere. Having just gotten out of the school system...Need I say more. I'm fairly conservative but "No Child Left Behind" is a big mess. Swinging, swinging, swinging, if you know what I mean.
I'm not sure if I'm a rockin' nurse, but I do get on well with the patients, even the more difficult ones. I figure, ultimately, that I'm not there to change the world, but to get them through my shift unscathed, and to try to connect with them as a human being on some level. They do appreciate that, but I feel like maybe I'm enabling them.
suzi-Q
115 Posts
True enough!