Terrified of working on my own

[Sham_wow]

I was so happy when I was able to get into a residency program for nursing at a great hospital. I was accepted for a progressive care/telemetry floor which has a residency of 12 weeks. During that time, you are assigned a preceptor who basically helps train you on the job and shares the patient load which you. Gradually you end up taking the patient load by yourself (which is four to five patients) but your preceptor is still there to guide you if you need it. At first I was so excited to have this opportunity. I couldn't possibly imagine going onto the floor alone after a brief orientation like most hospitals give you. But working nights has been a big adjustment and it has caused problems in my marriage. I had been out of nursing school for four months when I got the job because i got married straight after graduating and I moved to a different state. Currently I have two weeks of residency left and I'm finding myself becoming immensely terrified of being on my own. I know that my preceptor will still be someone I can ask for advice if I'm working with her, but I find myself always always always unsure of what to do when any new situation arises. And we get a lot of random situations. Patients that are having alcohol withdraw, stroke patients, post surgical patients, and many other situations that I haven't even come in contact with yet. Rapid responses are called often. This morning I woke up and found myself overcome by anxiety about coming off residency and being alone. I know it's good to ask questions but I question everything just because I want to be told what I'm doing is the right thing. I'm still unsure of when to call the doctor and scared because it's the middle of the night. Every time I do call them I feel so shaky it's hard to even think or know what to say. I know that everyone goes through anxiety about this but I'm already someone who suffers from anxiety and I don't want to go to my job every night afraid of not doing my job correctly or making a mistake. It's too much stress. I fee like maybe working in a hospital setting isn't right for me but I don't have enough experience yet to go and find another job. I'm just not sure what to do or how to help my situation.

[Dani_Mila, BSN, RN]

I know this is an old post, but I wonder how you are doing? Did you move to a different specialty??