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taken the nclex 3 times & failed!! need advise!!

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**disclaimer: this is a really long message**

hello everyone,

im new writer to the site, but i've always been a frequent reader. i need some advise from fellow nurses out there. i've taken the nclex 3 times and failed all 3 times. i'm starting to lose hope in myself and my decision to become a nurse. i did very well in almost all of my nursing school courses with a lot of hard work.. but i've never faced a struggle quite like this before. school/academics have always been my forte, so for me these failures feel like a slap in the face. im just writing here to maybe gain some insight on what i can do to take my exam, and how i can be more motivated. it feels like everytime i fail, i get more and more and more shot down and its so much harder for me to get back up. my new test date is in 24 days, but i think i'll probably end up changing it because i haven't fully studied like i should be. this is what i did to study the previous 3 times. if anyone can offer tools or advise, that'd be great Thanks:

1st time: august 2014: i took kaplan review and did all my q trainers and scored OKAY on them.. not the best. and i did about 60% of the qbank. to be honest i was kind of cocky this time, and did not study hardcore like i should have.. and i was very focused on my sisters upcoming wedding, so i was distracted all summer. failed at 75 questions. - and i just had a feeling that i had failed.

2nd time: november 2014: i was able to extend my kaplan, and i took a local review course for content. i heard from alot of classmates that this class was great. it costed $350.00. i used kaplan qbank, this class's review, and examcram CD (which i would not recommend to anyone because the questions repeat themselves). i was really focused and put my heart into studying all day long for about 1.5-2 months. failed at 75 questions. i thought i could have actually passed this time. i didnt do the pearson check because it would give me major anxiety.. needless to say, i was really disappointed when i checked my quick results.

3rd time: march 2015: i didnt start studying until january because i got so busy with holidays and it really took me a long time to get the motivation and positivity back. this is when i REALLY studied with my heart. i used lippincott rn review book, kaplan qbank (by now i was so familiar with the questions so i stopped using it halfway because i could easily recognize the answer), saunders book, and the notes from my review course. i spent a solid 2.5 months studying. i was sure i had passed leaving the exam becasue i felt that i knew more than the other times, and i had gone past 75 questions. my exam shut off at 127 questions. again, i was really disappointed in myself when i checked my quick results 48 hours later..

now i finally was able to afford to sign up for the FOURTH time, and i cant even get the confidence and positivity up to start studying full fledge. i'll study half ass sometimes.. but i know my heart isn't in it. i've wanted to be a nurse ever since i was a little girl and the constant disappointment is very hard for me. especially seeing classmates who have moved on from this exam, and seeing their success.. it's hardd not feel bad. if there's anyone out there that can provide some insight and advise, i'd greatly appreciate it!! i'm planning to sign up for ncsbn course, and i am currently reading the pearson nclex rn book. i dont really like it, but it's pretty informative.

sorry for the super long message.. lol