Stuttering Stupid Nurse

[pearlgarden]

So...I'm not looking for sympathy or anything. I think I just need to get this out. If you judge me for my decision then you judge me but know that I am hurting inside and feel hopeless.

I have a stutter and it's worse when I'm nervous. I'm a recent new grad and got my first job as an RN in May 2012 and I knew that my stutter was going to make it difficult at times to talk to patients, doctors, coworkers, and family members but I never thought that it would be this hard. There were times when I couldn't even say "Hi my name is.." or "I have some medication for you" and when it did happen the patients would look at me and wonder what was wrong with me or maybe they thought I was dumb or incompetent because of my stutter. And to make matters worse speaking Spanish is a must in my area and I stutter a lot worse when attempting to speak the little Spanish I know. The look on the patients face of confusion/doubt was the worst.

My coworkers started to notice and I heard one of them announcing to the other nurses there "dude, she talks all stupid." and they laughed...I pretended not to notice but ended up tearing up in the bathroom. I can't begin to explain how hard it is to speak as a person who stutters (I think only a stutterer would understand). I've tried hard to find ways to hide it and when someone notices it it completely embarrasses me and devastates me. I admitted a patient the other day the charge nurse wanted to see me do it and I stuttered so bad and then she called in an experienced nurse to finish up the admit assessment. The patient said "oh thank god. you seem to have better speech than this one" I shrugged it off. but called in sick to the work the next day. I quickly became depressed and doubted my ability to ever be a nurse if I can't even communicate effectively and I was highly stressed. The skills weren't the problem but the communication was. So before giving myself I chance, I quit.

And I don't know whether or not to pursue with nursing or to try something...anything else but every job requires speaking. I know I didn't even give myself a chance and I feel absolutely terrible that I did quit. I guess I just want to know if anyone else stutters here or knows someone who stutters. I already feel stupid for quitting and I know that I shouldn't have so please don't be mean about it.

[TheGooch]

I stutter-it's the result of a head injury I had when I was child. I also started having eye problems-my head took a good hit on a fireplace when I was about 3. I started kindergarten a year late because I had to spend a year in speech therapy learning how to talk again. Now as an adult I still stutter and also have a habit of talking a mile a minute when I am stressed or tired. My Mom used to tell me to "slow down and start again". I remember one instance when someone did a "porky pig" impression of me while I was talking to her. Rude but I think that says more about them and their upbringing than it does about my stutter. I think she thought she was being "cute". I used to work in retail and was in customer service which meant I had to tell others over the intercom if they had a call or page people. Not fun for a person who stutters or rambles on.

This thread is over a year old and I hope the OP has found the confidence at her job to put others in their place. In my case the person is usually very embarrassed by their rude and insensitive behavior after I tell them I had a brain injury as a child so that's why I have a speech disorder. It does amaze me that the people who are making fun of her work in the medical field and should realize that stuttering is nothing to be made fun of.

[kittleRN]

I came across your post as I searched for tips to help with stuttering as a nurse. I am a new RN about to start my first job in a couple weeks, and I have stuttered all my life. While I have been able to control it most of the time, it definitely comes out in stressful and professional situations. I am so sorry to hear that people can be so cruel at this stage in your life. I have not heard such cruelty since high school. Although I am prepared to hear it again soon, because unfortunately ignorant and rude people are out there! I have a new strategy to help me. Instead of being embarrassed or apologetic, I am going to turn it around on them. Make fun of me? Shame on you! I will hold my head up high. I know I can't do this with a patient, but if a colleague chooses to be rude, I plan on standing up for myself. We'll see if I actually get the courage:) I hope you have found peace from this situation and you are still practicing. I just wanted you to know that there are other stutterers out there struggling along side you.