Stuff my patients say...

[sdegracia]

A night in the ER is sure to bring out so many characters... along with their lovable selves come some of the best form of entertainment. So, some of my co-workers and I have decided to start compiling some of the craziest things we've heard... Here are a few of them:

1. Pt. just being wheeled in to the ER:

a. Pt: Nurse, can I have some pain medication?

b. Pt: Am I gonna be admitted?

All the while they've not even yet been seen by a doctor. Sir/maam, you've been in the ER for about 5 minutes. =_=

2. Pt. being wheeled in... "I'd rather go back to the morgue."

Nurse: "Oh, we have one of those here too."

PUAHAHAHA Pt- 0 Nurse-1

3. MD: so, what brings you to the ER?

Pt: My legs are hurting. My arthritis is acting up?

MD: do you take medication to relieve the pain? What usually works for you?

Pt: (at this point stuttering) Perco...perco...percojesus. Yes, Percojesus.

Puahaha yep! Pain meds are heaven-sent. Percojesus got good old acetaminophen!

[Carrie RN]

Oh, my goodness I so needed a good laugh, percojesus. I am so using that at work!

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

So instead of percojesus, they got tylenhell?!

Oh lord, I need to go to bed......

[Twinmom06, ASN, APN]

we admitted a guy out of the ED to our floor at 0630 this AM after he called EMS to claim a "diabetic emergency". When EMS got to his house he told them that he needed to be taken to the ER for his "Bilaudid" for pain management.

[sdegracia]

we admitted a guy out of the ED to our floor at 0630 this AM after he called EMS to claim a "diabetic emergency". When EMS got to his house he told them that he needed to be taken to the ER for his "Bilaudid" for pain management.

Silly patients.

[sdegracia]

Oh, my goodness I so needed a good laugh, percojesus. I am so using that at work!

You could only imagine what I endured having to witness that when the doctor was talking to the patient. Lol

[andi.w]

A patient recently told me that she was scheduled for a stress test and an autopsy the following day.