So stressed over my current job...Should I find another one? (long vent!)

greenfiremajick · Sep 6, 2009

My opinion is this: If $'s not an issue, life's too short to be this miserable. Your details of other nurses being just as miserable means it isn't an issue with you and needing to "just stick it out." Leave gracefully after finding something else. Make sure the new employer understands that you just wanted new skills, something else, etc but I don't think I would tell them what you've told us!! Anyway, that's just my opinion! Good luck and many hugs to you!

I'm looking for opinions and maybe just plain sympathy... I feel like my life has changed to the worse since I started my new job a few weeks ago. Sounds dramatic, maybe I'm exaggerating as I still have a wonderful spouse and I am happy in life in general...but I'm just so very stressed out with my new job. So, this is my situation at the moment:
I've been a nurse for over 9 years now. I'm a foreign nurse and had a job (my first one in the USA) in a large, well-known and respected university teaching hospital. I worked there for a bit less than 3 years. I left my job for being able to move in with my boyfriend (I was too far away from my old job and the commute would had been too much). I found another job on a very, very busy surgical (ortho) unit. I started in July and will get out of orientation very soon.
The thing is that despite of having been a nurse for years, and having dealt with very busy shifts in my old job, I feel like my new job is a handful. I'm not a new grad, not new to nursing...and still I am so stressed out I've never experienced anything like this, even though I well know what stress is (I've had bad insomnia and physical symptoms from stress before, stress caused by some personal issues). Now, however, it's become so bad, after a long time of being calm and de-stressed, that I've lost my sleep again, get hormonal pimples, feel anxious about going to work, have palpitations and feel like it's hard to breathe... I even had my first anxiety attack ever a while ago. I've never had symptoms like this before! Never, in my old job, did I dread to go to work and feel so overwhelmed after my shifts that I cry when I get home. Now I've done that too, a few times. I came home last Friday and all I could do was cry my eyes out. This is so not like me at all. Thank goodness I have the most supportive and loving boyfriend I live with!! :)
I've tried to think about this; what is so different with my new job? The new unit I work at is extremely hectic. I used to do nights in my old job, and now do days. I know days are more busy, and I know I'm also quite new on the floor, but then on the other hand there are nurses who've been there for years and they stay overtime, way past the shift has ended. Often nurses stay until 8pm, even 9pm or longer when you officially can clock out at 7:15pm.
There are a lot of discharges and a lot of admissions. I have a looooot more charting than in my new job. The charting is electronic, although we still have a lot of old-fashioned paperwork too. We have to do notes on patients every few hours, the admission paperwork takes at least 25-30 mins to complete and if you get, say, 3-4 admissions, it's so much work you never get out on time. If the patients have anything "extra", such as transfusions or dressing changes, you really work your butt off. I've never felt I'm lazy, I know I am not, and I DID run my butt off in my old jon. Now everything just feels very chaotic, too overwhelming... I feel I can't provide safe nursing care and I feel I can make a mistake at any time. I run on the floor, my heart racing, I wolf down my food as fast as I can...and my heart doesn't stop galloping and I have to concentrate on getting enough air in my lungs.
There is no a real space for preparing your meds. We have little computer carts on aisles where we sit and where we f.example prepare injectable meds. No real nurses' station with supplies handy. If I need one little thing, such as a saline flush, I have to run and get it from a supply room. For a syringe I'd run to another room. It's kind of chaotic and I feel things are not as organized as they could be. I feel I have no time to really concentrate on what's going on with my patients, as I'm too busy making sure my charting is up-to-date and being on top of getting my discharges done. I've been with a preceptor, although a couple of times I didn't have one (they think I'm ok, not being a new grad). The whole orientation is less prepared and not as well organized as in my previous job. I know I was pampered in that university hospital, having all the interns on call available and orders written on computer... (now I have to try to read MDs' handwriting and mess with a handful of paperwork that overwhelms me). Still...I am a hardworking person and despite of having been pampered, I'm not trying to be snooty and ridicule the system they have in my current job. The floor IS busy and everyone says it really is. There are nurses who are very tired, one nurse had to get therapy after she started and one is always so tired on her days off she has no energy to do much anything when she's off. And as I told, I often (many others too) don't get out on time and get home dead tired, overwhelmed and in the edge of tears at 9pm.
Sorry for the long rant... Basically I just feel unsafe working on this floor. It's not a small hospital in the middle of nowhere, it's around 700-bed one and they're trying to brush up their image and trying to get a magnet status (some people says the're not close getting it). I wonder, if I'm this stressed out now, this busy, WITH a preceptor, how busy will I be when I'm on my own in a few days? My life has started circulating around my job and I have trouble unwinding on my days off. I even had to get sleeping pills from my doctor as after starting on floor I stopped sleeping at nights.
How long have you, who have experienced something similar, stuck around and made a decision to look for something else? If I was a new grad, if I didn't know better and if I was younger (I'm in my early to mid-30's), I might stick around as it would propably be the overwhelm of a new career etc. But now...I've already seen what nursing can be, I've already worked on a busy ortho floor before (and have been busy in my home coutry before moving to the USA). This level of stress is just so different what I've had before! An d I really don't feel safe anymore. I don't want to get in trouble for forgetting something with my patients as I'm so busy I can't even think of my own name and all I do is run around, my heart palpating fast and my chest tight. . I've half made a decision to look for something else, I guess I just need some encouragement and some similar experiences and stories from you who've been in a same kind of a situation. I think I could try to ask to go half time, or get another job altogether. Money is not the issue (half time would be okay, or less paying job), all I want is to work so that I'm not under this tremendous stress.
Thanks for reading trough this long vent... Tell me your experiences, recommendations, whatever!! I guess I just needed to get this out of my chest.:redpinkhe

guest64485 · Sep 6, 2009

Couple important things

-you are not a new nurse so you already know the ropes of general nursing

-you see current staff staying late

-you have physical effects of the stress that is seeping into your home life

-you see current staff's stress seeping into their home life

These show that you are internally educated and experienced enough to know when things aren't right, and, externally, you can see that experienced nurses are not faring well either, which means that things probably won't get much better over time.

So you've got 2 options

-stay and work to improve the place, such as by putting the nursing supplies in one area for med preparation

-find a new job

I'd look for a new job while also trying to suggest improvements to the manager of your current job.

From what I've experienced and what I've seen of other nurses, there are many hospital jobs that offer poor working conditions, where you will see experienced staff crying, and you will not feel like you can always provide safe care, so take care that you don't get a new job only to be back in a similar working environment.

Good luck!

DogWalk · Sep 6, 2009

Thanks guys for your replies so far:).

I've thought about the same things... I just talked to my boyfriend, the very exact thing: "life's too short to be this miserable". I am sure not everyone on the floor is as miserable as I am--but I know more than one nurse have had problems and stress. And many DO stay there very late. Some nurses just somehow bear with it... I have no idea how. I guess they just get used to it or something. I just don't WANT to get used to being what I am now and I don't think it would improve a whole lot on the long run.

I am gonna have guts to do something about it and try to find something else...if not trying to stay there half-time (we won't stay in this city for more than 1,5 years the longest anyway, that 1 to 1,5 years just seems too much now to bear with the job for at least full-time).

By the way, what is a good "reason" to tell your new employer why did you leave your latest job? I would not tell I was so stressed out (thank goodness I have that almost 3 years in the large teaching hospital under my belt before the current job!). I was thinking if you can say "I want to provide safe, quality nursing care for my patients and felt I was not able to do that". Is that a bad thing to say? About skills... that is a good one, but the new job might be in a smaller place and I would not necessarily have "new skills" to deal with so that one might sound weird to say.

I really appreciate your opinions! More opinions are always welcome!:)

greenfiremajick · Sep 6, 2009

By the way, what is a good "reason" to tell your new employer why did you leave your latest job? I would not tell I was so stressed out (thank goodness I have that almost 3 years in the large teaching hospital under my belt before the current job!). I was thinking if you can say "I want to provide safe, quality nursing care for my patients and felt I was not able to do that". Is that a bad thing to say? About skills... that is a good one, but the new job might be in a smaller place and I would not necessarily have "new skills" to deal with so that one might sound weird to say.
:)

One of the biggest things "they" tell you not to do, is to "trashtalk" your former employer. Telling them you couldn't provide safe care at your old employment means the new employer may have doubts about your capabilities, or may have some unspoken thought that you are unable to deal with stress, etc......You never know how the hiring manager may interpret your words.....I would just find out something really positive or something that the new employer is known for and use that as the reason. Or if it is closer than your old job, use that as the reason. Find an objective reason that doesn't involve your emotions. That's what I would do, anyway.

MedSurgeMess · Sep 7, 2009

When you find a new job, you could always say, in reference to the current job, that it's not a good fit for you. If they ask, be noncommittal, and state that you're not sure of why, but it's not working out for you, and in fairness to your current coworkers you feel the need to find something that fits you. If this hospital is like this, many other facilities in your area may already know about it. They will appreciate the tact.

DeLana_RN, BSN, RN · Sep 7, 2009

Just wondering, what's your nurse/pt ratio? I once had a job on a very busy med/tele/PCU floor with a 1:8 ratio and it just about killed me; my 12-hour shifts turned into 14 (good day) to 17 hours (really bad day with enough admits/discharges to have to chart on 12 pts; needless to say, the charting started after shift change). I was a new grad, but many experienced nurses stayed very late as well.

I left after 11 months (don't ask me how I made it so long, but since it was my second job in my first year I felt the need to stay as long as possible). My reason for leaving: "Better opportunity". But frankly, no one has ever questioned why I would have left such a job - the evidence (1:8 ratio!!!) speaks for itself.

Best of luck to you, you will find a better job. Just remember, don't say anything that could be considered negative about your current job (such as "unsafe nursing care". The facts - such as your nurse/pt ratio and your responsibilities - should be enough.)

DeLana

CNORMBABarb · Sep 7, 2009

MedSurgeMess has great advice: "When you find a new job, you could always say, in reference to the current job, that it's not a good fit for you...state that you're not sure of why, but it's not working out for you, and in fairness to your current coworkers you feel the need to find something that fits you."

As a manager, I understand that not all jobs fit all nurses and would appreciate the fact that you can recognize a problem and move to an action that can improve your status. You definitely should not stay in a situation that causes you such physical stress and mental/emotional upheaval. There is a definite stress in switching from nights to days (sleeping patterns run amok) but what you describe goes far beyond that adjustment.

Good luck and I hope you find a better fit. You might even check out other open positions in that facility - sometimes different units have better organization and management than others.

DogWalk · Sep 16, 2009

It's been a while I posted this, but I wanna thanks for all the replies I got! Thanks for the encouragament--actually something happened and I'm on my way (hopefully) to more stress-free life now:).

I talked to my manager and told what's going on. He was very supportive and understood me. He said he'd look for something else in the hospital and found me a part-time job in rehab unit. I got a call today from recruitment and now it's official that I got the job (I interviewed in rehab last week). I will let my body rest for a while (part-time, although the orientation will be full-time, but still) and after I feel I'm "back on my feet", I can ask to go full-time.

They have 8-hr shifts so my days won't be as exhausting and the pace is slower than in my current unit which is ortho/gen.surg. (the floor is extremely, extremely hectic). I'm so happy things went this way and I can start enjoying life again--I hope the stress symptoms subside over time. Like I said, I have symptoms all the time nowadays--palpitations, fast heart rate, shortness of breath, anxiety, tearfulness and so on.

Anyways, thanks guys for encouragement!! :redpinkhe. You are great! :cool: