Should I quit nursing?

[rnsavinglives]

Hi everyone,

I'm a new nurse who has been practicing for about 5 months now and I already want to quit nursing. I work on a very busy med-surg floor with unsupportive management and not nearly enough staff as we need.

I have become so severely depressed that I am becoming worried about myself. This has never happened to me before. I absolutely hate my job and it is effecting me in all aspects of my life. I am so exhausted from working 12, 13, 14+ hours a day, that I spend all of my days off sleeping and trying to recover. I don't laugh much anymore or smile. I've cried so much that it barely happens anymore. I blow off every single person who wants to spend time with me because I just don't want to do anything or go anywhere because of how tired I am. I let myself go ever since I started this job and I've gained 20 pounds and stopped working out. I don't fit any of my clothes anymore. I've lost interest in everything and I feel like such a miserable person. There isn't any aspect of my life that I enjoy anymore.

However, I don't show this at work. I don't think anyone at work would be able to tell that I am this unhappy. I have a bubbly personality and get along with patients and doctors very well. I work very hard and have been told that I'm one of the best new grads on the unit. However, when I leave work all I can think about is how much I never want to go back. I spend all day thinking of any other career I could be doing. I have so much anxiety about going to work because of how bad I don't want to be there.

I always told myself that med-surg is temporary and that after 6 months-1 year i could transfer to a floor I really like. However, after actually working as a nurse I can't think of any floor I want to be on. I can't imagine it getting better at all. After all, nursing is nursing. It's always going to be the same tasks to do.

I just don't know what to do. The only good thing about this job is the money and I can't be doing a career just for the money, that will drive me insane. I've thought about going to a free counseling session that they offer at work, but it just worries me that they might tell my director or someone how unhappy I am. After all, I have to pretend this is the best floor ever in case I ever need recommendations to get away from it.

Anyway, please help?

[lindseylpn]

Why would you totally quit nursing because of one bad job? Hospital nursing is not all there is... If you can't imagine yourself liking any area of the hospital then find yourself a job somewhere else. There's LTC, assisted living, clinics, school nursing, home health, private duty, hospice, occupational health, insurance nursing, telephone triage, rehab facilities, group homes, developmental disability nursing, corrections. There's a whole world of nursing outside of the hospital, go out there and find your niche.

[Jensmom7, BSN, RN]

Why would you totally quit nursing because of one bad job? Hospital nursing is not all there is... If you can't imagine yourself liking any area of the hospital then find yourself a job somewhere else. There's LTC, assisted living, clinics, school nursing, home health, private duty, hospice, occupational health, insurance nursing, telephone triage, rehab facilities, group homes, developmental disability nursing, corrections. There's a whole world of nursing outside of the hospital, go out there and find your niche.

Please, people, for the love of fuzzy puppies, please stop dangling Hospice in front of overwhelmed newer nurses like it's the answer to their prayers.

There's so much that goes into being a successful Hospice nurse, it has its own set of stressors.

It's also not what OP is asking advice about, so I won't derail the thread any further.

Now, on topic:

OP, take a look at your name. Rnsavinglives.

Yes, you are entrusted with the lives of sometimes very sick people on a daily basis. The reality is, you can't save all of them. They will often die no matter what is done to keep them going. People also have the right to make choices, some of them very bad for their life expectancy.

You also can't effectively take care of others if you yourself are a physical and emotional wreck. I firmly believe in the importance of counseling. Does your hospital have an Employee Assistance Program? They provide counseling sessions for situations such as you're experiencing.

If you don't have one, or aren't impressed with the service (happens sometimes), talk to your physician, clergyman if you have one, they can both help you.

It's against TOS for us to recommend any medical advice, so that's the most I will give you.

Just know you aren't alone. You may read several differing opinions from the people in here. Don't let flippant advice, or something that seems insensitive or "mean" distract you from the fact that this has happened to many of us.

[Guest219794]

"I have become so severely depressed that I am becoming worried about myself. This has never happened to me before. I absolutely hate my job and it is effecting me in all aspects of my life. I am so exhausted from working 12, 13, 14+ hours a day, that I spend all of my days off sleeping and trying to recover. I don't laugh much anymore or smile. I've cried so much that it barely happens anymore. I blow off every single person who wants to spend time with me because I just don't want to do anything or go anywhere because of how tired I am. I let myself go ever since I started this job and I've gained 20 pounds and stopped working out. I don't fit any of my clothes anymore. I've lost interest in everything and I feel like such a miserable person. There isn't any aspect of my life that I enjoy anymore. "

This is not a normal or healthy response to stress.

Whatever counseling is available for free might be worth looking at. It would be a complete violation to share any information about you. But, if you don't trust them, there are probably plenty of other options out there.

Should you quit nursing? I have no idea, and neither does anybody here. Regardless, it sounds like you need some help learning to deal with stress.

Good luck.

[lindseylpn]

Please, people, for the love of fuzzy puppies, please stop dangling Hospice in front of overwhelmed newer nurses like it's the answer to their prayers.

There's so much that goes into being a successful Hospice nurse, it has its own set of stressors.

Yeah, hospice was thrown in there with 14 other specialties. I just listed everything I could think of as examples of what else is out there. I wouldn't recommend LTC to a stressed out nurse either. Although each person is different and each job is stressful in its own way.

OP You really sound a lot like me, I could have made this exact post at one time. When I first started I began in LTC, I cried almost daily for months. I slept from the time I got home until the time to go back to work. I didn't even care if I ate and had to drag myself to the shower. I didn't want to cook or clean. I didn't leave the house and stayed in bed on my days off. After more than a year I found a different job and became a different person, I enjoyed life again. I'm not saying a different job would be a cure all or stress free but, from you post it sounds like your job it's doing more harm than good for you. For me a change of scenery helped and I'm thankful to have stayed in nursing. Everyone handles things differently though, I wish you luck.