Redneck Medical Terms

[Fathappychap]

hope this gives you a good laugh! this way if you work in my home state of nc you will know what the locals hear when you say these things! lol!

benign - what you be after you be eight.

artery - the art of learning how to color real good.

bacteria - back door to cafeteria.

barium - what doctors do when patients die.

cesarean section - a important neighborhood in rome.

catscan - searching for kitty.

cauterize - made eye contact with her.

colic - a sheep dog

coma - a punctuation mark.

d & c - where [color=#3333ff]washington is.

dilate - to live long.

enema - not a friend.

fester - quicker than someone else.

fibula - a small lie.

genital - non-jewish person.

g.i. series - world series of military baseball.

hangnail - what you hang your coat on.

impotent - distinguished, well known.

labor - getting hurt at work.

medical staff - a doctor’s cane.

morbid - a higher offer than i [color=#3333ff]bid

nitrates - cheaper than day rates.

node - i knew it.

outpatient - a person who has fainted.

pap smear - a fatherhood test.

pelvis - .second cousin to elvis.

post operative - a letter carrier.

recovery room - place to do [color=#3333ff]uhpostlery

rectum - damn near killed him.

secretion - hiding something.

seizure - roman emperor.

tablet - a small table.

terminal illness - getting sick at the airport.

tumor - more than one.

urine - opposite of you’re out.

varicose - near by/close by.

[busymom31]

FUNNY!! From one Southerner to another!

[liveyourlife747]

omg, so funny!!! Love it!

[coltsgrl]

:hpygrp:

[mybelle3221]

love it!

[diane227, LPN, RN]

I am from Texas and we have a different language down there. But when I worked in an inner city ED I had to learn a few more:

I "fell out" means I passed out.

I "have sugar" means I have diabetes.

I "have high blood" means I have high blood pressure.

I "have smilin mighty Jesus" means I have spinal meningitis.

I have "fire balls in my Eucrest" (misspelled) means I have uterine fibroids.

I "can't pass my seed" means I can't ejaculate.

It is a whole other language.

[WoofyMutt80]

Oh geez!!!! And I thought people made fun of my Boston accent!

Arm- Ahhhm

Artery- Ahhhtery

We just can't say our "R"'s up here!

[9livesRN, BSN, RN]

"i hear my diabetus is from suggar, can i have corn syrup instead?"

what?