Question? Going in major debt..with minor doubt..about nursing career?

[c5150b]

Storys like below concern me about the future, my future?

I graduated from nursing school in 1979 and easily got my first job in a teaching hospital in acute care pediatrics. I was young and stupid and didn't put 2 and 2 together that while I hated nursing school and all the "BS" I would also hate nursing. I have not worked since 1990 because I was literally killed emotionally, spiritually and physically by this career.

If anyone wants to know why there is a nursing shortage it's really pretty easy, NO ONE WANTS TO DO IT!!! The real clincher is you work with other miserable people and wonder all along if others are hating it as much as you. (A good indication is when you start a new job and your preceptor keeps saying things like, "I hate this job.")

I worked in the PICU and also did transport and trauma. Have you ever asked someone in another profession if they ever feel guilty that someone is going to die because they dared to stuff a half a sandwich down after not eating or drinking until they felt like they were going to pass out, or do they have to ask someone to watch "their work" so they can go to the bathroom, or are they so tired after staying up for days that they are hallucinating, and this while lives are at stake.

Another thing that destroyed me was when my patients died and instead of getting a break or even a pat on the back I just got another patient. This is outside the range of being normal. I think nurses suffer terribly and from things like PTSD. We work in carnage!!! This is not normal. Things are not going to change and we are all looking at being "cared for" in some scummy hole by jaded caretakers.

Yes we are jaded for the reasons I just wrote. Think of how a "normal" person reacts to just going to a funeral, try doing it on a daily basis and having to act like it's the most normal thing in the world. Death and dying are a part of life but so is the sympathy and understanding that usually goes along with it. It's not normal to live your life in the greiving process and try to act like this is life.

Anyone who is in nursing school right now and/or mired in debt and doesn't think there is anyway out think again. There is always another path. Don't throw your life away like I did. I ended up getting a large settlement from a medical malpractice suit after becoming suicidal and being abused by a doctor. Now I am facing having to work again and the prospect of anything that has to do with nursing is nightmarish.

I am in a legal nurse consulting program and just reading the message board with all the pukey nursing enthusiasm (yes we that hate nursing know what I am referring to) I thought, "I have to have some commissuration", so I typed "nurses hating nursing" into my search engine and came onto this site. I hate to discourage people into nursing but I will give my honest opinion when asked and finally I have found some validation for my own feelings after so many years of total anguish. Maybe some of you can relate to this, it is almost a sin in some circles to say you hate something as sacred as nursing. You may think hate is a strong word but I wish I could think of something stronger, like HATE TO THE MILLIONTH POWER!!!

Don't get me wrong I was a superb nurse, but I absolutley despised every second working as a nurse. Now I live a life being so damaged by this profession. If you hate nursing like this do not feel like you are alone, there is at least myself and I am not a crummy person. In fact I am a Christian and very loving and smart (Summa Cum Laude graduate) sensitive and talented (and like I've read no I am not obese, unattractive, nor do I live on coffee and junk food). Please do not wait until you are 53 years old like I am to decide on a career move. Love yourself as much as we have loved our patients and get out while you can. Take it from me it is NEVER too late.

[calilvn2008]

Nursing is a tough job , but a lot of us here because we love the aspect of Helping People .You said that it is not normal attending a funeral everyday which is true but.....how many normal people get to save lives everyday ?Although their are some hard parts in it , when you provide quality patient care , and when families are thanking you for taking good care of their loved ones, it is PRICELESS!!!I guess its just which way you look at it.

[llg, PhD, RN]

Nursing is not the right career for everybody ... just like firefighter, policeman, soldier, nuclear physicist, mathematician, ditch digger, etc. are not the right careers for everyone. What one person loves, another person will hate. You can same the same about any career.

I am sorry that the person quoted by the OP did not have enough self-awareness to find a better career fit for herself sooner in life. She probably should have acted upon her job dissatisfaction earlier. Perhaps she would have been happier within nursing had she chosen a different specialty or a different employer. I don't know. But apparently, she has some serious problems in her life and blames some of them on nursing. Whether nursing is "to blame" or not, I can't say for sure. It sounds like she has some problems that go beyond nursing.

To the OP ... do your homework before making a huge committment. Spend some time in a health care environment by volunteering or working there. Talk to lots of people. Get lots of information. But most of all .... do the homework of learning about yourself. Understand why you are interested in nursing and whether or not you can make the committment to stick with it through the tough times. No career is perfect and everyone has some difficult days. Only you can know whether or not you can handle it or not -- and whether or not you want to.

Good luck,

llg

[LoriAlabamaRN]

I hate seeing people so jaded by nursing. I know that I wouldn't want someone like that caring for me or my loved one. When you get to that point, I agree that it is time to get out, and let some of those "pukey" enthusiastic nurses who still love nursing to take over.

[kukukajoo, LPN]

Wow! Have you heard of forgiveness? As long as anyone retains this attitude and disdain or as they say hate, you will never grow and flourish in life.

For me life is too short to blame me or my job or others for any of my misgivings, and I promise you there are lots and lots!

There is a saying- if you keep doing what you are doing, you will keep getting what you are getting.

Another one: If you don't like your life, then change!

Life is what you make of it, this poor person whose rant you found sounds like she has a problem with life, never mind nursing! I feel for him/her but as a professional the person has to take some responsibility for where they are now.

You can't tell me there were not choices along the path of life this person could have taken for a different, much happier outcome. Sounds like a martyr to me.

[llg, PhD, RN]

There are basic skills that everyone needs in order to be successful in a career. The OP's post illustrates several of them.

1. Self-awareness. The person quoted by the OP clearly let herself go on a downward spiral for far too long before she acted on the fact that she was not happy with her career choice. She made a series of bad choices in choosing a career, choosing a specialty, choosing an employer, etc. and then compounded those bad choices by not recognizing her mistakes and changing her career path sooner.

2. Personal responsibility. Again, the person quoted by the OP has yet to take any personal responsibility for the choices she made and the actions she chose to take (or not take). She needs to accept responsibility for her choices and stop blaming an entire profession for her personal mistakes.

3. Healthy skepticism. Anyone reading the story quoted by the OP should be able to see that the writer has a lot of personal problems related to #1 and #2 above in this post. They should realize that the story-teller is NOT a reliable, credible source of information about nursing in general. The story is the rant of someone with deep emotional problems -- and not representative of the nursing experience in general. Yes, not everyone is happy as a nurse. Yes, there can be some significant problems within nursing. But a sensible reader should be able to discern a "reasonable analysis" of the situation from a distorted one.

In other words ... don't take everything you hear or read at face value. Judge the characteristics of the source. Don't be too gullible and/or trusting of everyone you encounter.

As for whether nursing is a good career choice or not, use the same analytical skills to assess yourself. What are your strengths, weaknesses, likes, and dislikes? What do you care about? How do you want to use your talents? What do want from a career? What types of work are you willing/able to do? Is there a career path within nursing for which you seem well-suited? (There are many different types of roles within nursing.) Are you willing/able to do the work required to succeed on that career path?

llg

[elkpark]

I agree (as usual :)) with everything llg said. Nursing is definitely not for everyone -- there's no question or mystery about that! Lots of people drop out of nursing school because they figure out early on that it's not the right path for them, or leave the profession early on (for the same reason), and there's nothing wrong or shameful about that. What is very scary to me is the idea of someone staying for decades in an occupation that's making her/him miserable, and not making the changes s/he need to make for her/his own well-being ... We're all responsible for our own lives and the choices we make.

[GilbertDaddy]

I know several nurses who feel the same way because they haven't really tested those "greener pastures" prior to getting into nursing. In my experience (as someone who wants to become a nurse and is in school for that), nursing is indeed a passion one takes on from the beginning. I can feel your pain looking back, especially if you always had doubhts

However, your care is directly indicative of your temperment and if that's not positive, you'd do everyone, including yourself, better by moving on. Your feelings seem valid and I'd definitely think more about them if they're that strong.

Having been in a few fields already, I've found that sitting placidly behind a desk waiting for payday was 10x worse than being in the mix, even if it is stressful. There is a painful disconnect in those well paying "desk jobs" that often gets taken for granted.

I'm sorry you're not feeling very well, I hope you find what you were looking for here. No one likes to see nurses go down in flames, whether due to the stress, work environment, or other nurses

[newnurse51]

I started my nursing career very late in life. I graduated in my 50's and found it to be the hardest most stressful work I have ever done. It's a constant love/hate relationship. I love helping people and making a difference in their lives. It's a wonderful feeling when you know some action you did probably saved someone's life. When a patient says you are the best nurse they ever had you will glow for the rest of the shift. On the down side, working with difficult co-workers, management, constant interruptions, stress, etc has left me cursing that I ever went into nursing on many a days. The most positive thing about nursing is the wide variety. I truly believe there is a niche for everyone - you just have to find it. You have given alot of yourself to become a nurse, financially, emotionally and physically - give nursing a chance and find that right niche for yourself.