Phil-on-a-bike

Phil-on-a-bike

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All Content by Phil-on-a-bike

  1. Payrise - well, not really

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to osceteacher's topic in United Kingdom

    Interesting post-script to this: our local Unison branch have distributed flyers to all departments 'clarifying' the figures. The text of the flyer says that they're doing this in response to the...

  2. Life in UK

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to gudo's topic in United Kingdom

    UK problems: 1: Country House murders. The NHS is stretched to breaking point by a constant stream of Dowager Duchesses who've fallen victim to cyanide or antique Kashmiri blowpipe darts during garden...

  3. How long have you been a nurse

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to Rocknurse's topic in General Nursing

    30 years as a British 'RGN' come September, and 24 years (I think!) since I took my US NCLEX. I intend to die in harness. Or have my consciousness uploaded into a robonurse. Either's

  4. Things Patients Have Taught Me NOT To Do

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to Trixxy's topic in Nursing Humor

    Never, ever.... do the housework naked. Because I saw so many patients in Accident and Emergency... with so many foreign objects in their orifices... ...and almost all of their stories began with the...

  5. Cartoon Caption Contest WIN $250! Nurses Week 2018

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to Brian S.'s topic in News, Announcements

    The day was saved by swift administration of a Triple-H enema. Five minutes later, Mr Jenkins was far too scared to

  6. My Colonoscopy

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to Davey Do's topic in Nursing Humor

    [ATTACH=CONFIG]26398[/ATTACH] You're upholding a proud tradition,

  7. March 2018 Caption Contest - Select $100 Winner!

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to Joe V's topic in News, Announcements

    What were you expecting when you opened the door marked "Corporate Planning and

  8. Specialty Poll for male nurses

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to DatMurse's topic in Men in Nursing

    I'm a double-"other"! Full-time clinical research - which isn't one of the named options - in the field of Haematology - which also isn't one of the options. You can't pigeonhole

  9. Are you discerning with your "likes"?

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to klone's topic in General Nursing

    Confession time: I'm not a habitual frequenter of fora in general, and - despite the ease of AN's layout - it took me a while to realise what the whole 'like' business was about. And by that time......

  10. January 2018 Caption Contest - Select $100 Winner!

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to Joe V's topic in News, Announcements

    "Someone called for a 'Lab'

  11. Avoid the UK

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to Jhurlow's topic in United Kingdom

    It was unjustified and unnecessary because... and this is not rocket science... those nurses who wanted to pursue an academic path already had access to further development. There were already...

  12. Avoid the UK

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to Jhurlow's topic in United Kingdom

    Duly noted - I hunched over the keyboard well into the evening on Wednesday writing an Individual Submission to the Committee. Seven points: * 2015 NHS pension changes (from 'highest salary' to...

  13. Permanent contract or full time bank nurse?

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to rosmbre's topic in United Kingdom

    Hi Rosmbre, The voice of experience here: I did this for eight years, and I loved it. BUT: there are a couple of points you might want to bear in mind. First, your reluctance to join an agency....

  14. Gender neutral bicycle!

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to hppygr8ful's topic in Nursing Humor

    There was a running joke amongst my friends and I, when we were about 12 or so. It would start with: "I saw you on your bike the other day...." "Oh aye?" "Aye. It's got nae crossbar." OR: "It's got...

  15. Charlie Gard

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to Lavender111's topic in Nursing News

    Horrifying slow-motion train-wreck of a case, with no upside whatsoever. Random thoughts, in no particular order: The expert opinion of top clinicians at one of the leading children's hospitals on the...

  16. Avoid the UK

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to Jhurlow's topic in United Kingdom

    Oops! Re-read my post in the light of your reply, and realized... yeah, I did come across a bit snippy. (My apologies, I didn't mean to.) Fingers crossed that you find a workable resolution that...

  17. Avoid the UK

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to Jhurlow's topic in United Kingdom

    Short version: Unlike State Boards, the British NMC has a monopoly on the regulation of Registered Nurses & Midwives, and exhibits all the abuse-of-privilege an unchallenged monopoly engenders....

  18. I miss floor nursing...I think?

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to tshunni's topic in General Nursing

    You're very charitable! I'm hardly 'BBC Newsreader' material, though. If you want to hear my regional accent, have a listen to Liam Cunningham (Ser Davos) on 'Game of

  19. You've Got To Be Kidding Me

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to CapeCodMermaid's topic in Geriatric, LTC

    Reminds of this joke: If the "Titanic" disaster happened in 2017: Sailor: "Abandon ship - Women and Children first!" Passenger: "Oh, excuse me, did you just make an assumption about my gender...

  20. Best MD note

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to beckster_01's topic in Nursing Humor

    Most mystifying one I ever saw said: "Thank you for reviewing this 50-year old gentleman, who is a member of the dark glasses brigade." I had absolutely no earthly idea what it meant to imply, and...

  21. I miss floor nursing...I think?

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to tshunni's topic in General Nursing

    I volunteered (Yeah, I know) for extra duty as part of our hospital's "Winter Pressures" measures last november. It's not unusual here in the UK. It meant leaving my cushy desk and going to Acute...

  22. What is the grossest thing that's happened to you???

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to PrincessAlexis's topic in General Nursing

    Apologies folks - duplicate post. (Like it wasn't bad enough first time

  23. What is the grossest thing that's happened to you???

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to PrincessAlexis's topic in General Nursing

    Night shift on a cardiothoracic unit - we hear moaning and retching from the ward and when we investigate, find one of our lsevere COPD patients sat up in bed, dry-heaving hard. He caught his breath...

  24. What does your username mean?

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to LifesAJourney's topic in Nursing Humor

    Mine is a cryptic riddle - a mystery wrapped in an enigma, if you will. In dusty libraries deep in the hallowed halls of Oford & Cambridge, tweed-clad academics pore over it's meaning like a...

  25. Silly random nursing thoughts, one sentence, NO JUDGMENTAL FOLKS ALLOWED

    Phil-on-a-bike replied to wooh's topic in Nursing Humor

    Occasionally, when somebody asks me if I'm carrying the keys, I say; "Nah, it's just the way these trousers