I know having problems with one's nursing preceptor is common, but I just thought I'd fish for some advice here. I graduated from nursing school a few years ago with a BSN, at the top of my class and fairly confident. Alas, it took me a while to find my first nursing job, in semi-acute care at a rehab facility. I worked there for over a year, and now I just started a new job at an acute care facility. The entire situation is very different from my first job -- patients are sicker (so some of the interventions are very new to me), the charting system is different, the nurse/patient ratio is different -- essentially, it is starting over for me.
I was assigned a preceptor who is well-respected, well-liked, and very experienced. Alas, she is very impatient with me, even though I have only been on the floor for a few days. She feels I am too slow, gets annoyed if I do not understand how to use the equipment or know how to do some of the skills (some of which I haven't done since nursing school), tells me I talk too much to the patients (I talk while working to keep myself calm and centered, as well as to get to know the patients better), and gets irritated if the computer system isn't very intuitive to me (my previous facility had NO computers).
I have been very respectful to my preceptor and openly admitted that I feel a bit new and lacking in confidence. I feel I 'am' progressing slowly (I have half an assignment after only a week, even though the intention was to give me one patient a week -- I now have 4, and a full assignment is 6). But my preceptor is only focusing on what I'm doing wrong. Adding to this, she always takes breaks with me but will not talk to me at all (my attempts to make small talk fall flat). When asked if she was upset with me or something, she harped that I was 'half-baked' and 'not ready' (and will not be in the allotted 4 week orientation) and that 'new nurses have it easy today and not like when she became a nurse years ago.' She gets particularly irritated if I 'don't write things down' like where supplies are (though I have indicated that I remember by doing and seeing, not by writing things down -- I am a very visual person).
Bear in mind that I am in my 40s and though I am new as a nurse, I am not a child and have done many other things in my life. I never asked to be treated as an experienced nurse, but I just don't feel she sees me as a human being or is very compassionate. Very weird when she is nice to everyone. Even when I mentioned I had a migraine at work the other day (I get them bad), she was unsympathetic and just asked if I had finished my charting.
I apologize for sounding dramatic, but my orientation experience is really turning me off to the facility -- a very nice facility, and one that could afford me a great learning experience. Not sure what to do -- I just can't afford to come home and go to work feeling so low about myself when I feel I am trying so hard (and feel I am progressing, though not to my preceptor's expectations). I hate feeling so stupid and being made to feel so. I would appreciate your candid advice and feedback (please be kind).
